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Rebecca
04-29-2004, 07:15 PM
Oscar 8/2000 – 4/25/04

Oscar was and will always be my sweet baby boy. He has been my world. This is not a realization I came to now that he is gone, but one I’ve know since the moment we made eye contact 2 years and 10 months ago. Oscar spent the first 11 months of his life neglected, caged and regularly smacked & yelled at. The prominent caregiver was a man and Oscar never completely recovered from the abuse. He was terrified of men and had serious trust issues with all people. He knew, wholeheartedly however, that he was completely safe and totally loved with me. He was my little shadow. That’s one of the reason making the excruciating decision to put him down was all the more agonizing. He suffered with diffuse intervertebral disc disease and had at least 5 calcified discs. And those were what were evident on x-ray. His first injury happened while I went away for 4 days in early March and he stayed with Grandma (my Mom). He was in so much pain but he had no gait instability nor any paralysis. It was because of this injury that I was made aware of the degree of his disease. I altered his lifestyle, all the while in somewhat a state of denial. I just couldn’t believe that his feisty little boy could be so compromised. Once he began to feel better it was even harder to believe. His wonderful vet reconfirmed for me that these discs were “time bombs” waiting to happen and I had a challenge ahead of me and even with all the changes to his activity and lifestyle, a rupture was probably inevitable. I took on the challenge, I just never thought it would be so much sooner than later. I ordered a nice ramp for the living room and downloaded directions on how to build one for my bed. I stopped allowing him to take the steps at the apartment. I banned him from the bedrooms while I wasn’t at home (he liked to sleep in my bed while I was at work). I started consistently saying “no jump Oscar”. I didn’t let him jump on and off the couch. I didn’t even want him hopping the curbs when we walked. Once I had the bed ramp built, I brought it home this past Saturday and it freaked him out so terribly. He ran in to the spare bedroom and I can only assume he tried to jump on the spare bed and all I heard was agonizing cries. I ran to him and he was unable to move his right leg. I knew exactly what to do and I scooped him up and rushed him to the emergency pet hospital. The vet consulted with the on-call surgeon and it was decided that since he was not paralyzed in both hind limbs that they would put him on IV steroids, pain meds and fluids. He would be observed over night. I was given some comfort in knowing that it wasn’t as bad as it could be because he still had use of the left hind leg and had pain sensation in the right paralyzed leg. I was terrified, but knew he was going to be ok. Oscar took a turn for the worse as the night progressed and the vet called me early Sunday morning to tell me the on-call surgeon was on his way and that Oscar had gone down in the left leg. My heart dropped and I raced to the hospital where the surgeon met with me and recommended surgery. He was very matter-of-fact in that he told me Oscar had excellent chances of regaining mobility after this surgery but that the likelihood of additional ruptures was probable given his youth and the degree of his disease. He told me that if it were his dog he would do the surgery but that money wasn’t a concern for him. I could have just died right there. I would have sold everything I owned to generate the $2,000 needed for the surgery if only I felt that Oscar wouldn’t have to spend the rest of his life restrained and restricted from being who he was; feisty and oh so active. The first year of his life was spent caged, I just couldn’t bear him spending the rest of his life crated when I wasn’t with him. I also couldn’t fathom how I would pay for the first surgery (although I would have figured it out), let alone multiple surgeries. Oscar died in my arms where he always felt safest. The guilt I feel is cutting me deep but not as deep as the anguish of losing him. I love him more than words can say. I miss him terribly and don’t know how I’ll ever forgive myself.
I LOVE YOU OSCAR AND YOU’LL ALWAYS BE MY LITTLE BUBBY. I LOVE YOU. I MISS YOU. IT’S SO EMPTY HERE WITHOUT YOU. YOUR MOMMY WILL LOVE YOU ALWAYS.http://atlantic.photoisland.com/sessions/89024944582/24486216lg.jpg

yolanda
04-29-2004, 07:22 PM
Rebecca, what a touching story, thank you for shaing your pain with us. Please take confort in knowing you did what you though was best for Oscar. He is now running across the rainbow bridge free at last. Bless you for loving him enough to let him go.

Mark
04-29-2004, 07:33 PM
What a wonderful tribute to your Oscar. We who have lost a furkid so suddenly feel your pain and offer our sincerest symphathies. Do not blame yourself . . . though many of us do so.

Try to let the wonderful memories block the pain of the event. As many of us have done, perhaps one day you will share your love for Dachsies again with another . . . not a replacement as that is impossible, but rather, a Dachsie to love and adore you as you do he/she.

Meanwhile Oscar is waitng at the Bridge with Wimpy and so many others who have gone on . . . to greet us when we make that journey.

onebigmickeyfan
04-29-2004, 07:34 PM
I am so sorry for your loss. I am sitting here crying for you and for Bubby. The life and love you gave him means he went to the bridge with a Mommy to wait for. You made the choice we all as huparents have to make at one time or another, and as hard as it was you did the unselfish thing that what was best for him. Thank you for sharing him with us. Please know you are not alone, a shoulder is here if you need one.

Joyce
04-29-2004, 07:35 PM
Oh Rebecca where do I start I lost my own sweet love yesterday. Dudley showed signs of pain last week, and I took him to the vet she proded, moved, pushed tested reflexes made him walk you name it and my little trooper would not let out even a little peep. So I don't think they realized how bad he really was (neither did we) he didn't jump or climb the whole 5 days, when he went outside to go to potty he just fell over, and he could not move his entire back end, (Dudley was just 5) after taking to the Dr's we to decided to let our little love go (the hardest decision we ever made) because we didn't want him to suffer ever again.
I am feeling the same guilt and sadness. I know exactly what you are going through. I never knew I could feel so sad. So I am sending you my deepest sympathy and lots and lots of love. Need to talk you can e mail me don't worry if it says it blocked, I'll get it. Lets just believe that Oscar and Dudley are having a great time meeting at the Bridge and making new friends. Please don't feel guilty if you loved Oscar even half as much as we loved Dudley (which I'm sure you did) you have nothing to be guilty about.
With much love, Joyce

Kim H.
04-29-2004, 08:10 PM
also crying with you... I am so sorry. You did the right thing for your boy. I lost my little boy suddenly about a year ago (complications of a splenic tumor we didn't even know he had). There is no pain like the loss of one of these innocent loving little dogs.

Thank you for allowing us to share your pain and love for Oscar.

samiam
04-29-2004, 08:18 PM
I am sorry to hear about your loss. I am glad that you decided to post here even though we don't know much about you, I know that I, WE, still feel the all too familiar pain that you are going through now.:( .I ALWAYS feel pain when I hear of someone who has been through this!!! Thank-you for your decision to share here. I too have been through the agonizing pain as you have. Sometimes I think back and wish that I would have put her in a cart but then I have to stop and think about the promises from them that I think could NOT BE fullfilled. Again..... I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I used to be able to say that 'I can't imagine what you are going through'........but then there was SAMANTHA SUSANNE. Each person feels something different, however, WE all feel loss and hurt and pain of losing one of our babies!! You as well as Joyce have my deepest sympathies.:( Please feel free to post here anytime. Those of us who have been through this and share similar feelings will be there for you. Thank-you for feeling comforatable enough to share with the DBB..........Gala P.S. I think that those who have NOT been through this will also be able to be there for you. Anyone who has lost or have a 'BESTFRIEND' can identify with what you are going through.

loogie
04-29-2004, 08:25 PM
Rebecca,

I am so sorry to hear that you had to make such a difficult decision. Please take comfort in knowing that Oscar had a great life because you chose to love him. You have nothing to feel guilty about.

I know how difficult it is to lose a loved one and I am in mourning with you and Joyce.

Shanie

Roobyrocks
04-29-2004, 08:57 PM
Rebecca, I'm so sorry for your loss. You were brave enough to do what was best for Oscar and have nothing to feel guilty about. How wonderful that he knew love and felt so completely safe because of YOU. You've found a great group of caring & respectful doxie lovers here and we are all here if you need a shoulder. Take care.

TessieMom
04-29-2004, 10:01 PM
Rebecca,
I am so sorry for your loss, but know that Oscar will always be free to run without pain at the bridge. He will live on through you. I know he is now with Stinker and all the others that are waiting at the Bridge. Take care and know you did your best.

minicooper
04-29-2004, 10:02 PM
My sincere sympathy to you, Rebecca, for the loss of your beloved Oscar.

I have never had to make the decision that all pet lovers dread, but I can certainly imagine how awful it would be.

Oscar is now running at the bridge with Dudley, and all the other DBB babies who have gone before.

Take care of yourself.

Heidismom
04-29-2004, 10:42 PM
I know so well what you have gone through! I had to have my Fritz-Angel put to sleep in 1979 for IDD, Heidi-Angel had "episodes" but never went completely down, and Gretl-Angel had surgery at age 10, and made it to almost 14 1/2, before passing in her sleep. I am crying with you, and for you, as well as for your Oscar! In great sympathy, Julia B.

willsana
04-29-2004, 11:21 PM
You gave Oscar the only happiness he had ever known. You were so lucky to have found each other!

We would all be honored to hear your memories of your life together, or to be your shoulders to cry on. I saw his photo in the Brag Book Forum. What a beautiful boy! His eyes are like magic.

Heide
04-30-2004, 05:35 AM
My deepest sympahty to you.
What a wonderful tribute to Oscar.
Oh, yes its very hard to make the decision to let our loved ones go. But know you were brave and did the best for him.
You gave him such a wonderful loving home and he knew that.
He is pain free now and playing at the bridge with our loved ones we have lost. He will see you again one day.
Giant ((((hugs)))))) to you
We are here for you.

isobelsmom
04-30-2004, 07:09 AM
Rebecca, thank you for sharing your grief with us, it's a brave thing to do. You will not find a better group of people who understand what it's like to lose a beloved pupper. It's a miracle that you and Oscar had found one another and you made his passing easier by holding him in your arms. My deepest sympathies for your loss. Please, feel free enough to post any and all things you need to say about Oscar---we have big shoulders and all of us have been there.

Big hugs and lots of love to you... I will say a prayer and light a candle in Oscar's memory tonight.

Meemoo
04-30-2004, 08:21 AM
sympathies to you Rebecca. You gave Oscar true love and he's now at the bridge with other wonderful dachsies. ((HUGS)))

Juneysmom
04-30-2004, 10:38 AM
I'm sorry to hear about Oscar. I know what it feels like to have to put down a dog. The guilt can be overwhelming, even though in your heart, you know it was best to do this. Your pain will lessen as time goes on. Make sure you write a journal of all the special things that happened. Joyce, if you are reading this, I hope you will do the same.

I hope that what I say next is not offensive to anyone. One thing I did when I was in a great deal of emotional pain, was to write it down, then print it, then kneel down in prayer and ask God to take away the pain and to give me some relief from the pain. After this prayer, it seemed like the pain was lessened a great deal, and I couldn't remember the bad very well, only the good. I knew that there was bad, but it wasn't forefront of my mind anymore. Maybe you can do the same. At least, just writing about how you feel, helps.

After Cleo, Taffy, and Hunter died, I told myself that I would never have another dog, but here are Bunny, Cooler, Juney, and Trixie. :) While they have never taken my other three dogs' places, they have given me enough joy as to lessen the pain of loss.

ShewShew
04-30-2004, 10:39 AM
So sorry for your loss. Most of us here have lost a beloved furkid, but those who haven't still feel our pain.

You sound like you saved Oscar's life. In the short time you had guardianship of him, you showed him what life is supposed to be like with a human. And he, in turn, left pawprints on your heart (and fur everywhere else as someone's signature says). I'm sure he was a great little guy, all dachshunds are. You were his stepping stone to greater things.

All our dachsies, and other lost pets, met him at the Bridge, I'm sure Dudley was the first one waggin his tail to meet him, and tell him all the new and exciting things there. He'll be waiting for you, too, and will surely thank you for all you did for him, including not letting him suffer.

While we don't know you very well, we love you. You are family here and were blessed with being owned and loved by a dachshund. If you ever need to chat, please email or PM someone. We're always here for you.

Rebecca
04-30-2004, 11:01 AM
I can't begin to express my gratitude to all of you. I was reluctant to even post a tribute to Oscar because I just couldn't bear the pain. Doing this however, has provided me with great solace. You all feel like friends and I'm sad for everyone's losses. I will always have Oscar in my mind and deeply planted in my heart. Once his ashes come back, I'm gonna have my own special memorial for him. He meant so much to me. Again, thank you. Each and everyone.

Joyce, your words touched me and I hope you are doing well. Dudley is beautiful and I know he was loved. Heck, I love him. It makes me feel good to think he's with Oscar making Oscar feel welcome.

Love to all of ya'
Becca

quavec
04-30-2004, 12:10 PM
Oh the pain you musts be going through. Please know that you did what you felt was best for all. Consider that you gave him a wonderful life while he was with you and were shielding him from what would surely be traumatic had you put him in a crate for his own health. Remember that sometimes the quality of life greatly outweighs the quantity. He is on that bridge now running with so many of his friends and telling them all about the wonderful mommy he had.:angel:

Rebecca
04-30-2004, 07:09 PM
I am in so much pain right now. My little Oscar isn't here to wipe away the crappy day. I love him. My heart is broken and I've never, ever felt this much pain before.

yolanda
04-30-2004, 07:28 PM
Then take a deep breath and place him in you heart where he will alwasy be with you. I know you do not believe it now but things will get better. Remember him with love and joy.

onebigmickeyfan
04-30-2004, 07:34 PM
Here is Becca's handsome Oscar. She asked that I post them for her. He really is an especially beautiful fellow.

http://pic2.picturetrail.com/VOL26/931426/3609334/52497333.jpg

http://pic2.picturetrail.com/VOL26/931426/3609334/52497207.jpg

Meemoo
04-30-2004, 07:34 PM
Oscar your :angel: is watching over you and will always be with you in your heart and soul. Take time to grieve, get angry, ---all perfectly normal emotions and share them---with us. :) Tell us of all the wonderful antics and times you had with him. It will take some time....but we're here for you!

loogie
04-30-2004, 07:44 PM
Oh Rebecca,

I have been there and I know how crappy it is - there is no feeling on earth worse. Keep talking to us and we will be here to listen.

When we lose somebody we love, we just don't know what to do with ourselves. Our whole world is turned upsidedown.

It will get a little easier with each passing day but it will take time.

And I know exactly what you mean about Oscar not being there to wipe away the crappy day. It is like you need him more now than ever but he isn't there with you. Just remember that he IS still with you and always will be.

Shanie