Puppy Tails

[Penny's Aunt]

My breeder sent this to me. The author is unknown.

Now I lay me down to sleep,
The king-size bed is soft & deep...
I sleep right in the center groove
My hooman bean can hardly move!

I've trapped her legs, she's tucked in tight
And here is where I pass the night;
No one distrubs me or dares intrude
Till morning comes and "I want food!"

I sneak up slowly to begin
My nibbles on my hooman's chin.
She wakes up quickly, I have sharp teeth--
I'm a puppy, don't you see?

For the morning's here
And it's time to play
I always seem
To get my way.

So thank you Lord, for giving me
This hooman person that I see,
The one who hugs and holds me tight
And shares her bed with me at night!

[Wienergal]

Cute pome! And completely realistic! Except that the poet forgot to mention the morning ritual of standing on top of the hooman bean and furiously licking about the head and face to alert the hooman that it's time to get up. In dog time..... http://dachsie.org/ubb/frown.gif

[Penny's Aunt]

hi my name is pennny. you hoomans just dont unnerstand how hongry little dogs can get. you think we onlee neede 2 meels a day! now i wille tell you how it shood bee:

early morning brekfast
after-brekfast snak
nap
brunch
before-lunch snak
lunch
dessert snak
nap
mid-afternoon snak
late-afternoon snak
before-dinner tidbitts
dinner
dessert
snak before bed
nice meal left out in case we get hongry at night.

[weenie]

Hi Penny....dis is Willi,

u are so cowect about all of the meaws that we should be fed. it is a shame dat some hoomans beans kan't wead and fowwo diwections. http://dachsie.org/ubb/rolleyes.gif

wuv,
willi

[WOTANSMUTTI]

Wotan here,
What's the recipe for a canned dog food pizza with lots of cheezzzzz?

http://dachsie.org/ubb/tongue.gif

[Dolly's Mom]

Hawwo! This is Miss Dolly

Do you think we could somehow get all the dogfood manufacturers (big word for little doxie) to change the diwections on the kibbo bags? Should weed 4 servings a day supplimented with good yummies in between. And Penny's Auntie? I think more naps should be on the daily sheduewel.

Love,
Dolly

[Penny's Aunt]

Back in the olde days when Cheez Whiz was new, a woman I knew said her son left the can on the table or counter & forgot it. SOMEONE with 4 legs got it to the floor & managed to figure out how to work it. He got the can wedged in a corner & must have stepped on the nozzle. Instant cheese! Doggie Heaven!

This was the same dog whose owner was sick with the flu, & her youngest boy (about 3) came in & asked if she needed a drink of water. No, she said, but he could be a good boy & feed the dog. Okay, Mommy!

A few hours later, she woke up & all was quiet. Sick or not, she got up to check. Son was watching cartoon quietly. Dog (med. size mix) was sitting under the kitchen table, stomach distended, belching.

The refrigerator door was still open, & all kinds of containers were piled up on the floor in front of it. As best as she could tell, her son had offered the dog virtually everything in the refrigerator for breakfast, including an open jar of pickles. The dog had eaten pizza (spit out the olives), raw bacon, most of a block of cheese, all the meat & some of the bones from some leftover chicken, a carton of cottage cheese, part of a carton of yogurt... and other things I can't remember. She asked what she should do. I just handed the phone to my vet. His first advice was to get the dog outside as fast as she could!

[WOTANSMUTTI]

Cheeze Whiz is it's own food group, right?

Loved the bed poem. Daches are so relaxed if they can get what they want:YOUR Bed,YOUR Food,YOUR Love and Attention!