Need help making a dachsie decision

[shawnj]

Hi!
This is my first time posting to this bulletin board. I have enjoyed reading some of the posts. I have a 4-year old miniture long-haired dacshund. His name is Nickie (short for Snickers). I've had him for a little over a year. Nickie and I have had some hard times together, but we have managed to settle in. Nickie is extremely high maintenance. He needs lots and lots of attention and he has a mind of his own to say the least! I've done a little Alpha training with him to alleviate some problems I was having with him relieving himself in my guest bedroom, and keeping me up at night with his whining and groaning because he wanted to play. Here's my problem. Recently, I've been forced to travel more for my job. Just when things were settling in with me and Nickie, I am spending less time at home. Therefore, he's either at the kennel or with a girlfriend that he really likes. But even with that, he is starting to act out again by running around my bedroom all hours of the night, tearing into the garbage can, and urinating in various areas in the house. I try my best to spend as much time with him as I can, but sometimes it's just plain hard. Beginning September 13th, I'll be out of town for almost the entirety of Sept. and October. This makes me think that this situation won't get any better any time soon. I've been considering 3 options: 1) Send him to "grandma's" for the next two months (she lives in Louisiana and has 2 dogs of her own), 2)Keep him in the kennel everytime I'm gone (that's gonna be expensive), 3) Get him a dog or kitten companion to keep him company (could be creating a bigger problem), or 4) Find another home for him permanently (someone who understands the temperament of dachsies. I don't know what to do. I love him to death, but this just isn't fair to him! He already spends quite a bit of time alone during the day while I work, and with all the traveling that I'm doing, it will just get worse. I miss him when I'm away, but I also feel guilty for leaving him so much. It's like I have a kid! I would appreciate any insight you all can offer on this subject. I need to make a decision soon.

Shawn

[Mickamack]

Shawn, it sounds like you've got quite a problem on your hands. I'm not sure I'll provide you with many answers, but if I can't, I know there are lots and lots of people here who will help you in any way they can.

You had mentioned that you had been doing some Alpha training with Nickie, however, the biggest part of doing any training is consistency. If you are not around a lot right now, it will be very difficult if not impossible to be consistent enough to train him. That is especially true if he is spending time away from home, in a kennel or at someone else's house. With being at someone else's house, there is no guarantee that they will work with the dog like you would...and with a kennel, I'm sure he doesn't even have that much human interaction.

If Nickie is not being trained consistently, and you are gone more and more, it would seem to me that your problem is going to get worse and worse.

For people who live in a one-dog household especially, their doggies might seem "needy", but then we have to remember that we are their entire lives. They depend upon us for EVERYTHING...food, water, attention. The sun rises and sets according to us. They aren't in a pack anymore, but their instincts are pack-oriented. We are their pack.

As far as being gone for the months of Sept and Oct. In my opinion, that might be a real problem. I don't think it would be beneficial to Nickie at all to be in a kennel that long. I think that would make things worse for him and you. And I don't think that getting another animal would help the situation at all, but rather make it worse. You'd then have another animal that would need your time to train it...which you don't have right now.

It would be one thing if it were a temporary situation, or you would envision not traveling so much in the future. But if you will be continuing to travel this much, I think you should consider placing the dog permanently somewhere.

Please don't misunderstand me. I would never suggest such a thing without much thought. It's a very difficult decision to make. But right now, your job is taking you away from home a lot. That's a reality and it probably will not change anytime soon.

Nickie needs to be in a place where he can get the attention and consistent training that he needs...I feel that would be best for him and for you. Whether that place be another home, or "grandma's", I think you would both be happier for it.

If you were to decide that you wanted to give him up for adoption, I would highly recommend that you get in contact with some rescue organizations. We have several members from Dachshund Rescue on this board, who deal with situations like this all the time. If Nickie is not fixed, please do NOT put an ad in the paper. A lot of puppy mills scour the paper looking for dogs to buy for their horrendous breeding purposes.

I know this was long, but you have some difficult decisions to make. Please listen to the advice given on this board. We have a lot of really great people, who really care about their dogs and will help you and Nickie in any way they can.

Please keep us updated.

Karen

[sillysadie]

Hi Shawn,

What a difficult decision you have to make for your baby. I like the grandma idea as this lends to a more stable home for Nicki but if you should need placement I am here to help. My e-mail is shelley.l.davis@att.net. I am a member of Dachshund Rescue of North America and I would be more than happy to help.

I know this is a hard decision but should you decide to go the adoption route we are here to help. There is also another org. Coast to Coast Dachshund rescue so we have a lot of area covered should you need us.

Shelley Davis
DRNA New Mexico

<font color="#00FFFF" font size="1">[This message has been edited by sillysadie (edited August 24, 2000).]</font>

[dutchman]

Hi Shawn,

I don't envy you your decision. I hope the grandma idea can work out but if not I would suspect if you do end up giving up Nickie to rescue and then down the road your work situation changes where you no longer have to travel that rescue people would not consider this a black mark on your record since you would have come to a very difficult decision that you felt was in the best interest of your little buddy. Any comments from someone directly involved with making these rescue adoption decisions would be welcome here.

Another possibility that would be better than a kennel would be a pet sitter who visits your home twice a day while you are gone. From what you have said about Nickie I doubt this would work out very well, it sounds like he needs more time than a pet sitter would be able to give him. I would definitely try to avoid any prolonged kennel boarding.

One thought would the girlfriend who has been taking care of Nickie when you are gone. Would she possibly be interested in giving him a new home? I know this might even more difficult than giving him up to rescue since you would still see him but he would no longer be your little boy.

I really appreciate that you are trying to make some tough decisions. A few more questions to ask yourself and I know I may be making a difficult situation even more difficult. Will you get so depressed or mad over giving Nickie up (if that is your decision) that you will start to resent your job and you will end up doing poorly at work? Is so then you might want to find a temporary solution for the Sept/Oct time then consider a job change. Of course the question will then be reversed will you resent Nickie for causing you to change your job? I realize these are very difficult questions but ones that you have a better chance of knowing the answers to than some outsider who doesn't really know you. I'm not saying Nickie should be more important than your job but some individuals would feel that way deep in their hearts and if you are someone like that then you need to be aware of the possible impacts on you life as a whole if you give up Nickie. Some individuals might end up resenting their job for forcing them to give up their companion then their job starts to suffer and they end up out of a jobs as well as loosing their comanion. Of course the reverse could be true you change you job to keep your little friend and then resent you buddy for making you give up what you felt was a rewarding growing opportunity.

I hope things work out for the best for both of you what ever you decision my be.

Tom, Frank and Tanner

[Roxane]

Hi Shawn:
For me, the worst part of decision making is the time before the decision is actually made. The emotional tug of war takes a toll.
On this board you are surrounded by people who have faced the "tough ones" regarding decisions effecting their pets. For that reason, regardless of which way you go, there will be support and empathy for your situation.
The most difficult part, for many of us, is to separate ourselves from the problem and focus on what may be in the best interest of our pet. When I am able to do that, I feel it is the optimum way I can express the deep love and affection I feel for the animal. After all, I am responsible for it's well being, even if that means heartache for me.
The "consistency" others have mentioned often spells the difference between a well adjusted pet and one that develops neurotic behavior. In my experience, I have observed high levels of anxiety develop in many animals when their daily routine was radically changed. Like people, some can take this in their stride, others can not.
This may manifest itself in what we label "bad" habits. Those habits are not "bad" from the animal's point of view. The pet is simply exhibiting an inability to deal with the confusion.
I feel I have an obligation to provide the security of routine. It gives our pets the opportunity to relax, interact in their normal way and be receptive to training.
If, for any reason, I am no longer able to do this, I would hope to find someone who could.
This is just one more point of view to possibly help you through. Whatever you decide, thanks for the struggle. We know too many others who never give this much thought to the problem you are facing.
Roxane