DWDs bestest secret ComCenter #28

[Mark]

It is safe to report here fellow Agents and AITs. :)

[Heidismom]

Whew! Thank goodness - I thought my hoomom was gettin' a little too close to our secret network! Hewwo, all fellow and girlie Agents and AITs. This is Agent Sleepy, 'portin' in!
I got to sellabrate the time change with - tada! - scrambled eggies! I got some on Saturday, and then I got more on Sunday! It has been very slow for mishuns around here! I have not been able to communicate with my niece, AIT Dragon, for the last two weeks. My hoomom has changed ISPs - whatever that is - and she is on the phone or the puter all the time - I think! Anyhow, my only misshun lately, is to wait until Hoomom leaves for work, and then I tell Hoodad that she didn feed me! He falls for the L@@K all the time! I have been gettin' two breakfasts for about 2 months now! I urge all fellow and girlie agents and AITs to do the same - you know we are allus starvin'! The trees are gettin nekkid! Repeat: the trees are gettin nekkid!:blush:

[gunther's mom]

Adbisor Putty here- Jes a wise move to the new section. Only thing is I hope dat the new agint wannabe AntiTubby can figure out how to git here. Now I haf to say dat I can relate berry much to AntiTubby specially since it seems i live not too far from AntiTubby. It is berry cold in upstate NY.
And AntiTubby. A MASH outfit is a definite plus for mishuns. I have a stephoscope in one of da dwawers dat my hoomom does not use anymore. Mebbe i can steal it and send it too you.

[panzer]

Ajint Tank portin in :wavesmile:

I iz berry berry a-cited to weport my late-ist mishun sukcess de udder nite da Hoomomma and Hodaddy wuz messin wif da Hoosisters ears an de got outs a tweat dat wuz small an round an has sum white stuff on it an I fink dey called it a dog-nut. It wuz supposed to be fur da hoosister but I gotz it offa da table and ate it all reel fast afore dey cud take it away frum me. IT WAS DELISHUS!!!:essen_15: I gots in trubble for it but dat dog-nut fing was worf gettin sent to my bed and bein in trubble.

I gots to go an take care of de Hoomomma she not feelin gud:ill: , and she iz laying on da couch all da time, gotz to go get unner da bwankit.

Ajint Tank ober an owt!

[beausmom1]

Ajent Wannabe Antitubby here! Oh my Dog, I fought I wost all my fewow ajents and adbisors der for a minute. Good idea bout da new page.

I am so glad to find an ajent who lives near me, and you even have a stephoscope! I would love to use dat for da michuns now dat I look da part wit my MASH shirt.

Tonight I went out in da cold to do my busy ness and my hoomom has one of dos cheap leashes from Target dat doesn't cwip right and I heard it snap so I started to run to da neighbors house, but hoomom yelled "Tweat!!" And I couldn't wesist. I had to go back.

Sorry guys, first michun failed. I won't let ya down da next time. Next time I'm gettin in dat time machine and makin it go to Ajent Putty's. I been watchin hoomom and I fink I know how to make dat time machine go... I fink.

PS: Ajent Tank, congrats on da dog-nut, dem fings smell so good! My hooparents eat dem too quick and I can't grab em! I fink I want one of dos hoosister fings.

[panzer]

Ajint Tank here,

Jus want to say :thanx: and a big DWD :welcome2: to da newest recruit AIT Antitubby, da cawse can allus use a gud doctur wif da steffascope. Make sure you get your tubberware and start puttin da cwedit cards an da tweets dat you can save fur da mer-gin-cees. Wots of de udder Ajints and AIT's keep dere tubberware unner da big bed, I keeps mine in da baysmint.

If I can git sum more of de dog-nut fings I will send sum to your cave so you can hab one two. Dey were so gud.

Allwayz glad to have new recruits fur de cawse!

Ajint Tank ober an owt frum de frozen pwace cawed Awaska

[MicheleS]

Ajent Digger here :wavesmile:

I would wike to :welcome: da noo AIT Antitubby to our ranks!!

Dere is trwouble agin wif da World's Meaniest Nasty Cat. Look at what I am accused of:

http://www.dachsie.org/vbb/showthread.php?t=34341

Da Powice is tinking I did dis, I might needs a lawyer! help2:

Digger out!

[panzer]

Ajint Tank here


Ajint Digger I red de awfull accuzashuns aginst you, I fink it wuz de worlds meanyest fewine. I am weady to use de cwedit card to cum an testify on behalf of your defense. You are too purty to hab dun it, I wuld be happy to help such a purty damzel in de-stwess!

Ajint Tank ober an owt.....to find sum new mishuns

[kerie0408]

Ajint Digger-- I do not know if you want to get dee Hoomans inbolbed. But my mudder is a lawyer and she no wike cats. Dee cats make her sneeze an dee doctor told her to stay away. I is berry berry hepful becaws I chase away all dee cats and dere are many of dem in dee nayborhood.

My hoomom offers a fwee consum-tation. Mebbee she can dee-fend you.

I is also berry hepful because I bark and I make sure my mudder is awert if dere is an amblance in dee neighborhood. I heard a joke once and it said dat a lawyer wants to know if dere is an amblance in dee area. Hoomom no wike dat joke.

Yer pal,

Silly Dog.

[gunther's mom]

Agint Digger- Adbisor Putty here. That was some fine offer from Agint Silly Dog. Silly dog's hoomom wud probably wike defending you over chasing them amblances. My hoomom in fact often wanted to chase away dose ambalnces too. Dey made her work berry hard. Now-- Here is another strategy. Remember dat I said I could possibly lend a stephoscope to Agint wannabe Antitubby. Well perhaps Antitubby could lend it to you then. Here's what you do. Put the ends in your little ears, go close to da wall, listen for mean cat sounds... den git another agint (need not be a full agint) to take a picture. This should do da trick. Oh----- you might needs yet a third agint helper since you have short feet. You haf to put da cold part of da stephoscope on da wall and yer legs might not be long enough. I have confidence dat, as a team, we can keep Digger outa trouble.

[panzer]

Ajint Tank portin in for AIT Fleck

As of de last comyoonicashun frum AIT Fleck, he wuz sent to da Doggie Jail in Texsis. His Hooparents are staying in a cave dey caw a hoe-tell and Fleck an his Furbrudder an Fursister were at da doggiesitters cave, and AIT Fleck ate sum shuz an tore up sum stuff and got a at-it-tude :boxing: wif the doggiesitter. I am wunderin why his hoopeople wuld hav sumbuddie sit on him, I wuld hav an at-it-tude :angry013: if sumbuddie dat sat down on me!

I fink dat AIT Fleck iz goin to hav to go to o-bee-de-nce class when he gets out of jail, part of his probayshun.

Ajint Tank ober an owt

[Jenn]

:wavesmile: Ajint Metro Bo portin in:

I hab been layin low cuz da hooma caught sniff ob da old com center and i hab to act wike I did not knowz what she wuz sniffin bout. I feel so much safer now! Ajint Digger I wead bout yer nasty cat pwoblems and I hab asolushun. First off use de L@@K cuz it is yer best definse. By dat pic da cat does look real nasty and GUILTY!!!!!! I don't knaw of any lawyers but my hooma said dat she gibs folks money for stuff called co-lat-teral, so if you need sum money den send me a blankie or toy and i's get you some money for da lawyer. You can pay me back in tweats. As faw da cat, der sum stuff called CAT NIP dat makes dem act stupid. Slip sum of dat to the nasty cat on da court day and da jery can't help but tink dat he's crawzy and dat he's got too be GUILTY!!!! Good Luck!

[Paul Coover]

AIT Spaz here, AKA Willy. Yo! How we doin? I had a vewy bad night here. I was forced to go out into the poison drops! It was weally wainin' poison drops hard! My daddy put me out and I got weally wet! But I got my sweet wevenge. I peed on his nice, cween, white shoes when he wet me back inside! Now da swoosh is yellow, not white! That will teach him! AIT Spaz out...

[TessieMom]

Dis is Agent Bouncer 'portin in. My hoomom has been berry busy lately, so I had not had time at the computer machine. I has a new title in agility too... I is now NJC, NAC (Novice Jumpers Certificate and Novice regular agility certificate in NADAC)... those were very hard to get for a short legged girl. However, my Hoomom gave me cow steaks and an I has a big salmon steak too! Bouncer out to collect more ribbons and steaks! (I likes salmon da best)

[LaurieE]

Ajint Southawn Comfawt heah --

Ah just had to wepawt dat Ah have now learned how to wawk the TV wemote. :thumbup2: Ah tested it yesterday. So if y'all need to convey any pawtint infawmayshun by saddle lite, Ah can now weceive it. Ah fawgot and left it on, dough. :faint: My hoomama noticed it white away when she got home fwom wawk. She is gittin' a little fawgetful so Ah let haw think she didn't turn off da TV when she left in the mawnin'. :evilgrin:

SC out -

[gunther's mom]

Hewwo fellow agints . Dis is Adbisor Putty. I am especially impwessed by Agint Southern Comfot's ability to now use de wemote. Now i must tell you my mudder has four wemotes on her table. It is pathetic. Dere is wemote for da TB, then for the DVD, one for the VCR... dere are times when I haf seen her lose her temper ,as mastery of da remotes is not her strong suit. Oh yes, she has two wemotes for her moosic as well. She is 'wemote challenged". So Agint southern Comfawt.. ifin you kin send her messages,of course,in disguise to help her dat would be a very kind mishun.

[LaurieE]

Southawn Comfawt heah --

Ah will due ma best ta help yaw mama with haw wemote pwoblem. Ma mama has twee wemotes on da table in da daytime woom. One tawns da TB on and off, one changes da picktures, and one is faw another TB that is only for local infawmashun caws it doesn't go tew da saddle lite. De otha tew wemotes ah in da sleeping woom but mudda doesn't use dem vewy much.

As soon as Ah find waya ma mama put da instruckshuns, Ah'll send dem tew yew tew give tew haw. Ma mama always misplaces dings. Yew'd dink de humans wood have betta memories. Ah wememba waya Ah put ma dings.

SC out

[gunther's mom]

Sanks for de offer. Oh you gotta hear dis one. My hoomomma and hoodaddy just bought a new Hooman house. Not a big fancy house. BUT it is a white house. Does dat mean I was voted Pwesident?Dis is Agint adbisor Putty , but please advise..... I haf lots of studyin to do ifinfact I is da new Pwesident.

[LaurieE]

Southawn Comfawt heah --

Ah don't know. Ah hood dat ta be Pwesident, yew hafta wun. Did yew wun? Ah also hood dat dayahs dis ding called a pole-ing place. Do yew haf a pole in yew yawd or neahby? Ah dink if yew run tew da pole befaw yew move into da white house, it wood make sense that yew awe da new president.

[kerie0408]

:cheer: :cheer: :banana02: :banana02: :wow4: :appl:

Adbisor Putty you is dee new pwesident! I always knew dat you wuld go pwaces. Don't you lib near Small-bunny? Well, if you do it makes sense becaws dere is gobernment dere.

I tink dis means dat you will be on dee tellie-bision. You may hab to wear a tie, but only when you is on tellie-bision. I am sure dat you can chew on dee tie if it tastes good. When hoomom dresses me, I chew on dee clothing.

I am glad to weport dat I sayed wif hoogrampa and hoograndma last week when my mudder and fadder went on away. Hoogrampa tinks I'm an ellie-phant so he gibs me lots and lots of food. I will nebber ebber tell him dat I am a wiener dog. I want FOOD. I get hooman food and my speshul food when I am dere. I ate so many sammiches wif cheese! :banana02: Also, when hoogrampa watches telliebision, I sit on dee top part of dee couch until dee next time he goes to make a sammich. When I is asleep and I hear dee friderator, I kin run to dee kitchen so fast. Dat must be a good skill for an ajint to hab.

Congrats again to Putty.

Yer pal,

Silly Dog.

[panzer]

Ajint Tank portin in,:wavesmile:

I must weport dat I went to da woom of doom for de furst time here in Awaska, De white coat wuz not berry mice to me an dint gib me any tweats or acknowidge dat I is the bestist wiener boy. Since he wuz not innerestid in makin fwiends I growled at him jus a wittle bit :mutter: and he puts dis fing on my face dat kep me frum openin my mouf! He cawed it a muzzle, an I dont wike dat ebil fing one wittle bit!:tongue02: Den he tellz my hoomomma dat can neber have any more chikins, an maybe not hab any lambs or cows. An den he gabe her sum :yuck: pillz dat she keeps makin me take 2 times ebbery day! I iz being AB-YOO-SD! I dont wike dis white coat, de ones in Kintukey were berry nice to me an awlwayz told ebbry buddy dat I wuz de bestist wiener boy dey eber sawl. Now da hoomomma bot me dis new fud an I iz habin a hard time getin yoosed to it, an now I kin hab only one kinda tweet until dey find out fur shur if it iz just chikins dat I am awergic to.

Adbisor Putty
I iz berry excitid dat you are goin to be de new Pwesident :thumbup2: :yahoo: congwadulashuns! Now wif de Adbisor Putty in de white howse de cawse id shur to sukseed! I will watch de telliebision to see if you cum on de TB. Shud we cawl you Pwesident Putty now, insted of Adbisor?

Ajint Silly Dog
You are berry lucky de hoogranpa gibs you wots of sammiches wif de cheeze, cheeze is DELISHUS! My hoograndpa ate my tweats on aksident when I wuz bisitin him! He thought dey were jerkied cows. Da hoomomma laffed an laffed at him fur dat mistake!:rofl:

My latest mishun has been to git sum more tweets in da tubberware, I gotz to rash-shun de gud ones cawse dey are only gibing me de new alwergy ones and dey are ok but I am gunna miss de uld ones.

Ajint Tank ober an owt!

[Heidismom]

Hello, all fellow and girlie-girls Agents and AITs! This is Agent Sleepy, 'portin' in. I have terrible, distwessing news! I hadda go to the Room of Doom last night, and they wore pink coats??? Anywho, da Hoomom letted them squeeze my butt, give me a poke, check me over and then - horror of horrors, they weighed me!:sob: I was two pounds overweight and I haveta go on a diet! :annoyed: Looks like my last misshun of gettin the Hoodad to feed me a second brekfus was not as successful as I thought! I am :pray: that the weightloss:angel7: will help me get rid of my "avoir-du-prwah", as Hoomom calls it, so I can go back to life as it should be - with two brekfuses! Agent Sleepy, over and out! The scales lied! Repeat: the scales lied!

[gunther's mom]

Agint Sleepy- Dis is Adbisor Putty. My hooparents put me on a diet many years ago. Fwankly i feel better being a smaller Putty. I know, though, it is berry rough at first. But CAN"T dey put you a a diet after da holidays?
Oh yes, Silly Dog-indeed the white house is right in Small-bunny. But as Southern Comfot indicates ,one must "run" first and then collect the poles.I must confess I did not collect da poles. So I sink i am not Pwesident after all. I will however, contemplate this next year when the time is right.
Oh you gotta hear of my mishun tonight. As I was being walked, i chewed right through a neighbor's garbage bag and got a whole leg of turkee. I et most of it until my hoodad distwacted me with those pathetic Milkbones.....
I hope all my Agint buddies had a good Thanksgiving.

[MyMaisy]

AIT Snuggers weportin’ in for dee fuhst time! Sank you to Agent Little Bird for auforizing AIT Smartygrrl an’ me to join the DWD. I hab a bery bery impawtant warnin’ to issue to all my fellow ajints an’ AIT out dere, an’ we bof hab mishuns to weport.

I am bery bery happy to weport I hab wetired as a stud an’ am now wiving de wife of wugshury wif my new hoofamily. Dey gib me lots ub pats an’ bewwy wubs an’ mos’ impawtant ub all wots of tweats. My hoomomma wanted to make shur I was all healthy, so she took me to de room of doom where she said dey would clean my toofies an’ take my tonsils out. Ob course, de white coats all twied to confuse me by wearin’ COLOR COATS, an’ at fuhst I wuz bery happy to be dere acuz dey was all tellin’ me how handsome I was an’ told hoomomma that deys all wants to babysit for me. HOWEBER. Wet me be the fuhst to warn you, fellow Ajints and AIT, to be bery skeptical ob any hooman, whether your hoomomma or hoopoppa or hooanyone, dat you is getting’ your tonsils out because beweve you me, dose wuz not my tonsils!!!! I don’t wanna be too graphic in cases dere is any young puppers weading dis, but jus’ unnerstand dat I will neber, eber, EBER be able to pawform my former job as a bweeding stud. ‘nuf said.

Now, habing said dat I hab a bery impawtant mishun to weport, welated to my wecent surgewy. De white coats sent Hoomomma home wif some pills to feed me, which, as we all know, means CHEESE! Now, here is de mishun I hab accompwished for neawly 10 whole days: I hab managed to get at leas’ 2 pieces ob cheese for almost ebery pill I had to take. Sometimes even 4! Dis is how I did it: hoomomma twied bery hard to hide de pills in de cheese, but I was bery clevah an’ would woll and woll de cheese awound in my mouf until I popped de pill out an’ den I’d spit de pill out and hoomomma would put it in ANUBBER piece of cheese. Sometimes hoomomma would get sneaky an’ put it in somefing diffewent, but I would still manage to spit out da pill and gets more! Dis was a great mishun.

Agent Smartygrrl will hab to weport later, I must turn off de compooter afore my hoobruffers gets home! AIT Snuggers ober an out!

Dose was not my tonsils! WEPEAT: DOSE WAS NOT MY TONSILS!

[LaurieE]

Ajint Southawn Comfawt heah --

AIT Snuggers - Welcome ta da caws. Yew had a vewy successful fuwst miszhun. Ah's vewy pwoud of yew.

Ah had a good miszhun today. While ma hoomama was at wawk, Ah found some paypa towels in haw campin' stuff dat she hadn't put away yet and den Ah taw dem up inta tiny pieces and spwead dem all ova da living woom. She still hasn't figured out wheya dey wah and how Ah got 'em. When she asked wheyah did Ah git dem fwom, Ah didn't ansah haw. Ah thought a hasty wetweat was in awda so Ah wan ta da backdowah so she'd let me outside.

SC out --

[kerie0408]

Have I missed any weports from Diaper Doll and Barky Boy? I am in luf with DD and her brudder said I could go on a date wif her. But I tink she is breaking my widdle heart and out wif anudder boy. I haf not seen weeports frum her. I is sad.

Silly Dog

[gunther's mom]

Silly Dog agint- Dis is Adbisor Putty. The thing to do is to play hard to get. I agwee, DD would be quite a ketch.

[kerie0408]

Silly Dog agint- Dis is Adbisor Putty. The thing to do is to play hard to get. I agwee, DD would be quite a ketch.


When hoomudder wants me to go inside da gates I play hard to git. When she goes to werk, I sposed to stay in kitchen. I wun far away fwum dee kitchen. Sometimes unnder dee bed all dee way up stairs. Sometimes I go to dee couch and I twy really really hard to blend in wif da pillows. But I no wanna wun away fwum DD. Wif dee lady ajints, I can't help meeself sometimes. :hearts: :hearts: :hearts: :hearts: Iff'n DD comes back here, am I spossed to pweetend I don't notice her? Are you just saying dat becaws you want to play wif DD, Adbiser Putty? I don't fink you would do dat to me becaws you hab always been dere eben when I got in berry big twubble wif dee hoomom, and you gabe me advice about lots ub tings and you let me tell you about dee beach on dee Island of Long!!!

Hoomom is getting dee winter coats weady fer me. Dey is all lined up on dee row of hooks by dee door. She got a new one fer me and it is Kord-or-Roy. It looks dumb.

Yer pal, Silly

[Heidismom]

Agent Sleepy, 'portin' in. Hewwo, all fellow and girlie-girl Agents and AITs! I went to school today to teach my hoomom's children how to approach a new dog! I kept really quiet in my cave under Hoomom's desk, until after math like I was 'posed to, and then I coughed and Hoomom said,'Bless you!" and those children said, "Who's that?" :wavesmile: So Hoomom brought me out and I taught them how to let me sniff them first and Hoomom told them to never go down for the head, 'cuz that may make us growl, nip, or bite! I gave them all a good lick on the hand, and I did the same lesson for Hoomom's reading group - well, for the children from the other two rooms that I hadn't met yet. I had a great mission, and I just soaked up attention. Hoomom shared some lettuce, carrot, and peas, and then a piece of grilled chicken from her Asian salad from MickeyD's! :cheer: I reacquainted myself with Mrs. Martinez (future AIT's hoomom), who is next door to my hoomom, and scored some major belly rubs!! She says she may need a fuzzball like me! All the children thought I was very cute and said my fur was so soft, so I did my best to apply the L@@K as much as possible. :thanx: Agent Sleepy, over and out! The kids tasted good! Repeat: the kids tasted good!

[gunther's mom]

Agint Sleepy- dis is Adbisor Putty. Teaching the little hoopersons is berry important. Perhaps u should git the award for commoonity service.
And my dear friend Agint Silly Dog. Nope I wud nebber steal DD from you.. but i sure would love attending a wedding. Specially if it is on the Island of Long. See,here in Small-bunny dere are no beeches. When I was a baby Putty, I wuz in dat berry big city south of Small-bunny and dey had concrete beeches. Must say dat BIG city wuz berry dog friendly.

[kerie0408]

Agint Sleepy- dis is Adbisor Putty. Teaching the little hoopersons is berry important. Perhaps u should git the award for commoonity service.
And my dear friend Agint Silly Dog. Nope I wud nebber steal DD from you.. but i sure would love attending a wedding. Specially if it is on the Island of Long. See,here in Small-bunny dere are no beeches. When I was a baby Putty, I wuz in dat berry big city south of Small-bunny and dey had concrete beeches. Must say dat BIG city wuz berry dog friendly.

Adbisor Putty--I know dat big city. One time we went to a park dat had a pwace called "Small Dog Run" and a pwace called "Big Dog Run." Hoomudder twied to take me to Small Dog Run. No fun. Mostly chihuahuas on dere hoomudders laps. Hoomudder finally takeded me to Big Dog Run. Dat was fun. Dere was so many butts to sniff (I may git in twubble fer saying dis but dere was butts wif clingons). Uh oh, can I say dat on DWD? Any-who, in Big Dog Run dere was also a purdy beagle wif long eyelashes. And dere was lots of zoomies hapnin'. Mostly I was just lookin' fer new ajints!!!! Always twying to help dee cause!!!!

Den hoomudder took me to a pwace where hoopeople get served food right on dee sidewalk. Dey tied my leash to dee table but I was pullin' and pullin' and almost dragged dee whole table over to dee next table, where dey was eatin' chicken sammiches!!! Den, dee day was still not ober. Hoomudder took me to a store dat sells tings fer dee dogs (me). She was twying to find harness to fit my big neck but I had anudder idear. I had my head in dee bin where dee bones was. I was eatin' dee merchandise. Hoomudder was berrissed and we left dat store after she noticed me.

One time in dee big city, we went in a yellow taxi. Dee people dat own taxis nebber, eber, eber clean dem, so dee seats and dee windows taste like hebben when you lick dem!!!!!!!

I will also tell you about dee tunnel of midtown, which is berry scary and I would adbise Putty or anyone else to howl berry loud if you ever go in a car dat goes in a tunnel. Oh, after you are in dee tunnel, hoomudder has to drive up to a place where she PAYS fer dee scary ride in dee tunnel. Dat is called dee Toll and you should bark a lot when you are dere. After dat, you are on your way home (to my house!!!!) and you kin sleep dee rest of dee way 'cept if hoomom stops at dee McDonalds on dee 'spwessway. Den you need to wake up fast and be loud again.

Now ajints, ifn yew was paying tension, you will notice that my message above has 'struck-shins fer how to git to my house. You might need dem one day. Find dee berry big city of New Yawk (look fer yellow cabs, speshul parks fer ajints, and big buildings). Eben dough it is scary, be bwave and go to dee middle of dat city and find dee tunnel of midtown. Go inside tunnel, when you come out, bark at toll, den take 'spwessway. Do not git off dee 'spwessway until you cant see dee big buildings anymore. oh, you kin stop if you are gittin' McDonalds fer me. Send me dee signal dat you are in the nayborhood (maybe if you step on yer hoomudders cell phone), den I will find a way to meet you near dee hi-way. I lib near dee conbenience store.

--Silly Dog

[gunther's mom]

Agint Silly Dog and other agints too- dis is Adbisor Putty. It is good to know how to travel to other agints houses. Fwankly i think i am gonna run away for a little. I am so mad at my hooparents. Ever since dey bought this "White House" in Small-Bunny they are paying so little attention to me. So I might just take you up on de offer and ketch me one of dose yellow cabs. (Jes, I lived in NYC as a baby Putty so I know what dey look like.)
Today I hurt my paw-though it is better now. My hoomom pwetended she was concerned... even called my hoodad from work. But pfft- i still think I might run away even just to get their attention away from dis stoopid White House.

[LaurieE]

Southawn Comfawt heah --

Dat's not wight dat yaw hoomom and hoodad awe ignawing yew. Yew can come to Flawee Duh. Dayah awe otha ajints heah too. And da weatha heah is weally nice. Today it's going to be in da 70s. We ken lay outside in da yawd in da sun.

SC out.

[MicheleS]

Ajent Digger here :wavesmile:

Adbisor Putty, you can comes to my cave, too. I can shares my toys wif you, and you can helps me outsmart de world's meaniest nasty cat.

Hoomommy and hoograndma put up dis tree in da cave. :xmastre3: It has purty flashy tings and mommy calls it a "No-no-get-away-from-there" tree. Does anyone habe one of dese trees? Should I make a pee-pee on it so eberbody will know dat it is mine? :chin:

Please advise.

Digger out.

[kerie0408]

Ajent Digger here :wavesmile:

Adbisor Putty, you can comes to my cave, too. I can shares my toys wif you, and you can helps me outsmart de world's meaniest nasty cat.

Hoomommy and hoograndma put up dis tree in da cave. :xmastre3: I has purty flashy tings and mommy calls it a "No-no-get-away-from-there" tree. Does anyone habe one of dese trees? Should I make a pee-pee on it so eberbody will know dat it is mine? :chin:

Please advise.

Digger out.



Pee pee on tree, good idear!

Signed,
Silly Dog

[beausmom1]

Whats up dawgs? Dis is Ajent Wannabe Anti Tubby again! Portin for duties. Sorry I haven't been talkin to ya, but hoomom keeps takin her inter net machine to da school. I did not know der were so many dachsons in New Yolk. I fink dat is whre I live. Dis weekend hoomom brought ova dis udder dachson boy (I fink he's from small-bunny too). Anywayz, we were talkin and we fink dat dis is good fing bout da pwesident bein a dachson. I wuz gonna ask my dachson friend to do a mishun wif me, but my hoomom gave us des big turkey legs and I was so happy, I forgot all about da mishuns. Sorry my friendz, maybe next time.

PS My hoomom didn't put up one of dos trees but der is a snowman fing on da stairs-- will pee pee on that. 10-4.

[gunther's mom]

Agint Antitubby- Dis is Adbisor Putty from Small-Bunny... soon to be living in dat "White House". And nope, my hooparents did NOT put up the Christmas tree this year becuz they are obsessed with the new "White House". Fwankly, it is a berry modest house. BUT I will have a sun porch. Dose agints from NY know how important dat is cuz we are at a high lattitude. And we don't git de sun like de other agints from Florida. I am seriously thinking of bisiting them as my hooparents need to pay more attention to me. Maybe ifin I go away for awhile dey will miss me. Oh- it is not like me to whine.

[MyMaisy]

AIT Smartygrrl portin’ in. Adbisor Putty, I hafta say dis is berry spooky acuz I was comin’ here to ‘port on my whine mishun, and here you ib, talkin’ bout de whine! I hope you wuz more successful dan me in de mishun acuz so far I habbent been able to get da cheese but I will shur keep twying.

So, wast night hoomom sits on de couch wif the talky machine, you know, de one dat dey put to dere ears and den talks talks talks but when YOU twies to talks too dey tells you hush. I kin neber unnerstan’ dat, but anyways. Hoomom is talkin talkin talkin and she sez “I just poured myself a big glass of Whine and I’m just gonna relax tonight” and I gets SO berry excited acuz hoomom always be sayin’ to one uf my hoobruffers, “Do you want some cheese wif dat whine?” when he is buggin her for somefing.

Now, I nebber seen da cheese, so hoomom must be gibin it to him on da sly. But den I never seen da whine afore eifer, so dere you go. But now hoomom has said dat de big glass habs da whine right in it!!!! So I fink, Hooray! I’s kin gets da cheese if I gets da whine! So when hoomom goes to da potty woom, I’s jumps from da couch to da table wif da whine. But hoomom wuz just getting’ a tish-shoe acuz she comes wight back an’ starts yelling at me fer drinkin’ some uf da whine! And she neber eben menshuns da cheese! An I wuz sniffin’ and sniffin’ and sniffin’ for it but den for some weason, I fells asweep afore I could finds it.

AIT Smartygrrl, ober an out. The whines smell wike oak weaves. WEPEAT! The whines smell wike oak weaves!

[gunther's mom]

Hewwo- AIT Smartygirl and Antitubby. Adbisor Putty here. If wonder mebbe it is not near Christmas time at all and therefore maybe dat is the reason, Smartygirl dat dere is no cheese wif da whine. Da reason I speculate about all dis is that there is no white stuff on the ground . Remember I am from Small-Bunny NY and dere is always white stuff on the ground for Christmas.And no sight of the snow dwagons either. Mind you, I do not miss the white stuff... it gits cold you know where eben dough I have a nice coat. My brudder Jake has a nice coat too but it gits in the way of his doing "business' if you know what I mean. It's a mental thing in his head. Figers, he's a terrier.

[MyMaisy]

AIT Smartygrrl 'portin in. Adbisor Putty, I fink I know bout de white stuff you is talkin' bout. I's only seen it once, a coupla weeks ago, its berry cold and gets stuck in yer paws, wight? I thought it was a joke hoomom wuz playin on me acuz she wuz waffing at me when I was wifting my paws and wooking at dem and den de next day de white stuff wuz gone.

[LaurieE]

Southawn Comfawt heah --

help2: Ah need help fwum ma fellow ajints and AITs. Ma cave has been invaded. The hoodaughter and hoogwandson moved in last weekend and dey bwought in with dem a 4 month old kitten. :faint:

Well, Ah went ova to intwoduce maself and he hissed at me and twied to scwatch me. So Ah fought back. No way was Ah goin' tew let dis, dis ding attack me!! The kitten is now closed in da bathwoom and the space below the dawah is blocked.

Ah's not eatin' or sleepin'. Ah's keeping a watch on dat dawah 24/7 tew make shaw he doesn't escape befawah y'all git heah. Ah wood appweciate it if y'all got heah wather quickly. Ah's startin' to git weak fwom hunga.

SC out --

[gunther's mom]

Oh dear Agint SC...Dis is Adbisor Putty. I know what you mean by dose berry little katz. Dey is deceptive in that they are berry cute. Now here is a suggestion. Put some duck tape across yer nose--- oh no ,silly me, den you couldn't breathe... Ummm, i will twy to find out if they have doxie size surgical masks to pwotect yer nose.
Lastly, i am going to try to dig up hoomom's credit card, and hop on a plane to come down South as part of the rescue team.

[LaurieE]

Ajint Southawn Comfawt heah --

Adbisor Putty, Ah wood appweciate awl da help Ah can git. If'n maybe yew and anudda ajint culd come, maybe we ken push da big box dat is in fwont of the dawah ova some. Den dat nasty kitten will squeeze out fwom unda da dawah and we ken git it and intewogate it tew find out why dey invaded ma cave. Do ya dink dey discovered Ah'm an ajint for the DWD?

SC out --

[gunther's mom]

Adbisor Putty here. Eben my hoomom wants to go to Florida.. but she needs to go to dis thing called jobb. I would tell her to forgit about the jobb but I am fully aware dat the cwedit cards are avaialable becuz of the jobb.
BUT=let me tell you this. I have a whole stock of suntan lotion ready to pack in my little baggy for when i come down to rescue you. It is in da bottom drawer in the bathroom so i don't eben have to climb.
I know what you mean by da katz-i am in fear dat i need to go to my hoomom's friend. She has dese katz dat boxed me in da nose.

[gunther's mom]

Adbisor Putty here. Just to let you know i am a 13 year old Putty today. Maybe someone can tell me why all the snowdragons are in jail???

[MyMaisy]

AIT Snuggers 'portin in. Adbisor Putty, I am bery happy to be the first one here to wish you a bery Happy Birfday!!!!!!!

RE: da snow dragons, I fink one of our ajints must hab been bery successful dis year in de norfeast acuz we habbent had any frozen acid drops at all!! Mebbe dis is a super secret ajint inside of de snow dragon jail? Whoeber it is, dat ajint is my hero acuz I hates de frozen acid drops habbing been a southern dog most of my life.


Ajint SC, AIT Smartygrrl & me habbent been able to get down to Flooriduh to helps wif da evil kitten. I hope you been able to conquer her an' are doin' ok.

[LaurieE]

Ajint Southawn Comfawt heah --

Adbisor Putty, Ah wood also like to wish yew a vewy :HappyBday2:

Ah almost caught de evil kitten when the hoodaughta came out of haw woom. Ah jumped weally high but da hoodaughta stopped me. Den she put him back in da bathwoom. Ahz twying to fuhgit dat he's in da bathwoom but he makes all kinds of banging and crashing noises in dayah. Ah hope he's not setting up a CWD contwol centa in dayah. :scratch:

[MicheleS]

Ajent Digger Here :wavesmile:

I would wike to wish a :happybdaystring: to our dear Adbisor Putty.

I can twries to help wif da kitty if I can. After all, I habe experience wif da world's meaniest nasty cat. I not unnerstand fewines at all! :dunno: Yesterday I was slweeping all nice and comfy :zzzz: and she jumped on my widdle head and hissed at me out of nowhere!

I not knows about de snowdragons. We not habes dem here. Are dey like lawn dragons?

Digger out.

[panzer]

Ajint Tank portin in.....

Furst I gotz to sey a big :PartyFavor10: :party_15: :PartyFavor0: to Adbisor Putty. I git to hab my birfday in 4 more dayz, I iz hopin da hoomomma gitz me a birfday cake and sum new toyz, I got sum new toys for cwismiss but I can allwayz use more toyz.

Da chances for mishuns has bin slow, here in Awaska we gots so much sno dat I can't ebben go owtside ur I will get berried in da frowzen poison. But I still cant fnd dese "Sno Dragons" eberybuddy talks of, but I do see wots of de Mooss. I stay at de window and tell dem to git out of my yard:angry013:

I did hab a minur sukcess at de cwissmiss dinner, I sat unnder de chair of de little hoomans an ate all de fud dat dey dropt, it wuz delishus but de turkey bird made me hab de itchies.

Dis is Ajint Tank ober an owt!

[Heidismom]

Hewwo, fellow and girlie Agents and AITs! Dis is Agent Sleepy, 'portin' in! I have a great mishun I just finished! I kilt an ARTH! :thanx: It only took me 7 minutes from the time I noticed it whilst patrollin' the perimeter, to kill! It was eatin' my hoomom's plants, including that parsley stuff, so I took it out. I hear they have lotsa babies, and I didn't want my training facilities here to be overrun. I disdained to eat it though, so Hoodad threw it over the fence for some big BIMS hoomans call "red-tailed hawks" and he says they'll take care of it for me! Agent Sleepy, over and out! The ARTHS are fast! Repeat: the ARTHS are fast!

[LaurieE]

Ajint Southawn Comfawt heah --

Ah've good news and Ah've got bad news tew wepawt. Da bad news fuhst -- Ah'm only sowwy dat Ah didn't git a chance tew intehwogate it fuhst. :sorry:

Now da good news -- Ah's happy tew wepawt dat da meanest kitten in da wowld is gone and da CWD is no longah being built in ma cave.

Ah ovahood da hoodawta talkin tew ma hoomama dis aftanoon. It seems da kitten attacked da hoodawta when she went inta da bathwoom and it wasn't da fuhst time eithah. He's gone tew live some place else. :banana02:

SC out --

[kerie0408]

Putty, Happy birfday. Don't ferget to gib da look and git da tweats. Do dat fer at least one week.

Yer pal, Silly Dog

[abiose]

Azent Bean La Doon checking in :wavesmile:

Long time no see :blush: sowwy :sorry:
I'm quite buzy working in zee great French North Pole at watching over zee guests who are viziting my oomans (and who tend to leave zheir plates of food low enough for me to grab *giggle*) and to train zee 3 felines of our houze to do zee dirty job for me (as throwing to me zee plates of food which are to high for me to grab *giggle*)... plus it is cold so I'm not going out from under zee blanket pile a lot but make sure I'm doing plans for a big "DWD coup d'état" *waging tail*

To all my fellow AIT and Azents... vive la revolution and
:party4: :merry6: :party4:

Azent Bean La Doon... checking out :seeya:

[gunther's mom]

It is now time to say Happy birfday to Agint Tank-I sink it is Tank's birfthday tomorrow.. And Tank I must say I would love to see dose mooses. Usually it is cold enough here for mooses to do well, but dis year is berry wierd. Not much snow and I know mooses like snow.
Agint Tank you must send pictures of yer first birfday party.
And i want to say thank you berry much for all the wishes for my birfday. And Silly Dog- i did NOT, I repeat NOT get extra tweets. I am sinking about packing my little bags and going elswhere,like Florida,where agint SC lives.I could live in the outside breeze, no need to house me. Oh my mean hooparents, dey is so worried about my being a chubby Putty again. Dis had been a problems in da past. Over-N- out... Adbisor Putty.

[panzer]

Ajint Tank portin in

I iz uffishully 1 year old now! De Hoomomma wantid to get me a birfday cake but I haf de alwergies an de ebil white coats denied me any tweats cept my fud. But on my birfday I did manage to sukcessfully complete a mishun to steal da hoodaddys egg salad sammich!:banana02: He wuz not pay tenshuns to his sammich an I grabbed it an ascarfed it up, berry berry DELISHUS!!!:D
I showed sem ebil white coats whos boss, I gotz my own special birfday tweat! My homomma did git me some spensive fishy tweats (I fink de are sammin) fur my birday acause de are for alwergic dogs wike me, dey are de best tweats I hab had since I lost all de old tweats, acause de stoopid chickin alwergy.

Ajint Been la Doon
It is berry gud to see you are still with us and surviving de nasty cold an sno!
Since I move to Awaska I spend wots of time unner de cubbers too!

Adbisor Putty
:thanx: for de birfday wishes! If in you wants to you can come up here to Awaska an stay wif me an see de Moosis. It is colder up here but my Homomma is berry nice an lubs da doxies, an I gots a hoosister dat is berry well trained an gits me stuff an plays wif me all de time, she is how I gits all my xtra tweats. An de best part iz it is so cold up here dat you dont eben haaf to go owtside to potty, I gots a special potty room in da warm howse to do my bizness! Much better dan going owt in da cold an deep sno! Dat would show your Hooparents dat you deserve better treetment, no diets an ignoring you fur de white howse!

Dis is Ajint Tank ober an owt

[gunther's mom]

Agint Tank- Dis is Adbisor Putty. Pweeze give us pixures of you at 1 yr. old. I wemember when I wuz one....long time ago. Hey salmon will make yer coat really really nice for winter. And well-egg sammiches... could be worse. Tank you are getting into your prime. So you must think of yerself as one of the warrier agints (peaceful warrier that is...) Ober n Eat ... oops I meant over and out. Dat was a Freudian Soup.

[kerie0408]

Happy birfday to Tank!

For my first birfday, I got a new hoomom and new hoodad. Dats wight, brand new hooparents!!! Dey are dee same ones I hab now. Hoomom tinks she wunnerful becaws she wescewed me. She okay. I hope dat you alreddy hab a nice hoomudder but if you don't, make a wish. Dat is what I did. Hoomom took me to dee white coat just a few days after I came to lib with her. Dee white coat told her dat I was jus about one years old. Den I farted and fer a minute, hoomom almost left me with dee white coat forever!!!

Yer pal, Silly dog

[gunther's mom]

Agint Silly Dog- Adbisor Putty here. Now you know your hoomom is wunnerful for wescusing you. I did not know yu was adopted. Now my brudder was adopted too. But I tell you, he is berry berry loved. He wuz in the pound twice! In fact, he is still a cwazy dog at 18 years as he et my hoomom's glasses today. Da white coats speculated that he was about 5 when he was adopted.

[kerie0408]

Agint Silly Dog- Adbisor Putty here. Now you know your hoomom is wunnerful for wescusing you. I did not know yu was adopted. Now my brudder was adopted too. But I tell you, he is berry berry loved. He wuz in the pound twice! In fact, he is still a cwazy dog at 18 years as he et my hoomom's glasses today. Da white coats speculated that he was about 5 when he was adopted.

I is adopted. One day I will tell yew dee whole story. I libbed in a vaccum cleaner store, where dey sold carpet dwagons!!!! I was dere when dee store was open and I had to stay dere in dee dark when dee store was cwosed. I was miserable in dat pwace and I ate carpet dwagon hoses because I had no toys. Hoomom's uncle went to get his carpet dwagon fixed and he told dee man dat his niece lubs dachsies and dat I should not lib in a store. Dee man gabe me to hoomom's uncle, who happens to be a berry weird man, but it was nice ub him to get me outta dere. Maybe hoomom not so bad. I hab so many toys now.

[panzer]

Ajint Tank Portin in....

Adbisor Putty here is de pictures dat you wequested, da hoomomma hasn't put da newist onez on da puter yet, so dis is de est I kin do fur now....It's an actshun shot of me practicing gettin stuff offa da table.

http://img138.imageshack.us/img138/1483/dscn13472kf.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

And an udder one on da Hoomommas birfday, I wuz tired of the flashy thing she iz alwayz pointing at me!

http://img101.imageshack.us/img101/3493/dscn13949zt.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Silly Dog I iz so glad you got new hooparentz fur your furst birfday!:banana02: I iz berry berry grate full fur my hoomomma an hoodaddy, da hoomomma talks about de wescue thing but Im not sure if in Im weady to have a furbrudder or fursister, den I'd hafta share all my toyz and my speshul warm potty room!

Well fellow Ajints and AIT's allz I have to weport iz dat its is berry cold here in Awaska, last week it wuz forty below zerow, dat is too cold for us dachsies, and Im not gitting any gud mishun idears, Any shuggestshuns?

Ajint Tank ober an owt

[kerie0408]

To Tank--Dose are gweat pickshers!!!! You is doing a berry good job in reaching da table. Tomorrow in dee Island of Long, where I lib, it sposed to be colder den it has been for two years!!! Please tell me how to keep warm. Dee only ting dat weally helps me is dat hoomudder rubs my ears whenever I come in from outside. She says my ears are berry cold but her ear muffins do not fit me. I would not wear dem anyway.

[gunther's mom]

Agint Tank- You is bery impressive in yer personal mishun of obtaining fud. Now I must ask why is the fud green?Personjally the color of fud doesn't matter to me=all fud=good fud.) What color is your coat officially speaking that is? It is perty.
Silly Dog- Adbisor Putty here still feeling jealous of you living on Island of Long. My hoomom lived in Quinns once- more near the Island of Long.We have wunnerful mountain up here but no beeches. By the way, you musta did a good job eating dose carpet dwagon hoses, cause I rarely see a carpet dwagon hose here. But (sniffle)-sounds like you had a less than ideal babyhood. Believe it or not I even had a pacifier....Do not tell the other girl agints about this or they will think I am a wimpy doxie.Dis is just between us okay?
Mebbe all of us northern agints could come up with some worthy doxie gear for these freezin days. Specially for the "bathroom" department.

[panzer]

Adbisor Putty De thing on de table is just my toy ball, it isn't fud, da hooparents wont let me git on de table if dere is fud around. Dat is why I had to steel de egg sammich on my birfday, when da hoodaddy went to git de phone I saw my chance an I took it. Offishully my coat iz red dat is what da hoomomma says iz on my papurs, but I hab alot of black "oberlay" I got it frum my furdaddy (I think) he is a long haird sable an a champ-pee-in whatevur dat meens. De white coats alwayz call me a black an red and boy duz it make my hoomomma mad, but I gitz lots of compleemints on my coat. Da hoomomma lubs de markings on my face so de L@@K iz espeshully effective on her!

Silly DogThank you for de piksher compleemints, I don't like de flashy thing. I am sorry dat you are going to have to be cold, I haven't been owtside fur months cept to go to de room of doom an den de hoomomma putz a stupid coat on me an raps me up in da blankit. Otherwize I stay in my cave and sleep unner de blankits and do my "bizniss" in a special room dat is called the artick in-tree I call it my bafroom. Did your hoomomma git you a coat and boots fur de wintur? I hate dose things but when it is berry berry cold owtside dey are purty nice to hab.

I would be glad to help wif any idears fur de speshul dachise cold weathur gear, it gits reely reely cold in Awaska, I miss Kintuckey it wuz not so cold dere!

[LaurieE]

Ajint Southawn Comfawt heah --

Ah's happy tew wepawt dat Opawayshun Second Bweakfast was a huge success! :banana02: Ah woke ma hoomama up at 6 tew git ma bweakfast cuz Ah was hungwe. She didn't want tew git up but Ah tugged on haw blankets until she got up. Afta she gave me ma bweakfast, she went back tew bed, mumblin somethin about it being da weak end. Two howas lata, da hoodawta wakes up. She didn't know dat hoomama alweady fed me bweakfast. Ah had ma chance and Ah took it. Ah sat by da wefwigawaitah and gave haw da L@@K. And it wowked!!! Ah got anudda pawk chop!! :D Now dey's both mad at me faw lyin tew da hoodawta. :faint:

[LaurieE]

Ajint Southawn Comfawt heah --

Ah's on a woll today!! When ma hoomama got up to answah da phone, Ah jumped off da couch and gwabbed haw cookie off da coffee table. You should have seen how fast Ah wuz. Ah had dat cookie eaten in unda 5 seconds.:boogie:

[gunther's mom]

Agint Southern Comfort- I was literally on a roll too. Et a whole big thing. Big and round. Neighbors keep thowing their beagles...umm..bagels out. My hoomom gets disgusted wif da neighbors.

[gunther's mom]

Agint Tank- Quite seriously,is there a special device or hut that your hooparents bought you for doing yer "business" in Alaska? Because it does get very cold here, and my brother,especially could benefit.

[kerie0408]

Just wike Tank, I am twying to reach for high pwaces! My mudder an fadder use a stool to help dem reach dee big tall cabinets. I figerred out how to use dee stool but I can't weach dee cabinets. Cabinets are way up high and dey have snacks and kibble and bowls, but dey also hab yucky medicine. See my picksher. Ignore de dumb shirt. Hoomom tinks I look wike a rockstar.
http://www.liweddings.com/mywedding/album/i/110826.jpg

[panzer]

Agint Tank- Quite seriously,is there a special device or hut that your hooparents bought you for doing yer "business" in Alaska? Because it does get very cold here, and my brother,especially could benefit.

Adbisor Putty
My baffroom isn't a special device or hut, besides all de snow we git :snow: up here in Awaska it gits really cold da hoomomma sayz dat a few weeks ago it wuz 46 degreez below zerow owtside. Most of da time it is 20 degreez below zerow, and some days it will be zerow or a little above. All de caves here have these little rooms call artick entrees, small rooms between de owtside doors and de inside so de cold wont git into de cave so much. Da hooparents set up the entree by de back door wif de potty pads and told me it wuz OK to do my bizness in there. At furst I wuz not sure dat it wood be gud and I wood gits in big trubble, so dey gave me tweets ebbery time I did my bizness in dere to sey I wuz gud boy. I am de luckiest weiner boy in da world, I gits to potty inside de warm cave and I git tweets fur doing it!:thumbup2: It is soo much bettur than going owtside and gitting lost in da deep snow.

Maybe your hoomomma could find a place like de artick entree to teach your furbrudder to go to da bafroom, and then you could go potty dere too! No more going owt in da freezin cold an snow!:banana02:

[MicheleS]

Ajent Digger here! :wavesmile:

Its is amazing to see all of de ajents and AIT's doing such excellent werk out dere! Southern Comfort, dat was exceellent dat you could get de hoomom and her hoodawter to feed you. I sumtimes gets hoomom and hoogramma to feed me my dinner! :eating: Dey not gets mad at me, tho, cuz hoomom says I too skinny anyways! I wants to get me one of dem kitchen-climby tings like Silly Dog has.

I habe other good news - I just had my birfday!!! :banana02: I wuz three years old (but everyone says I dont look a day over two). I got wots of trweets and belly rubs, of course, and hoomom took me out and ebberbody said dat I is de purtiest birfday girl.

Oops, hoomom is about to go to the big bed and I habes to go claim de best spot.

Digger out.

[gunther's mom]

Agint Digger- A very special happy birfday to you. Now since i am an older Adbisor Putty I am not good as you younger agints on the puter. So now I will try to put some funny stickers on here _smilies-they call them. I hope dat dey go through:bdayparty: :

[gunther's mom]

Agint digger- i twied to put a smilie fer you but being an older, Adbisor Putty I messed it up. Here goes agin.:bdayparty:

[gunther's mom]

Folks- Sheesh i hope I don't git banned for my attempts to be computer litrate..... Agint Tank. ...Adbisor putty here. Well that is interesting. In Upstate NY it should be imperative to have artic entrwances like you have. My hooparents bought the new white house, as you know. But it has no artic entrances.Rats. I have got to have them consider it becuz brudder is weally old and I am no youngster.

[MicheleS]

Digger here again! :wavesmile:

I habe de bestest news - hoomom took me to da White Coats place to get my flea stuff and de cheif White Coat say dat I is too skinny. He prescribed wots and wots of treats and more meals and speshul yummy sause fer my fud! :cheer: :cheer: I is in heaben right now.

De white coats not so bad....... I repeat........ de white coats not so bad.!!!!

[gunther's mom]

Agint Digger- Congwatulations to you...I was put on a diet and it worked but I never got too skinny,really. Ohhhh- rays are need for my hoomom. She is not gitting her usual fud as she is on Weight Watchers.

[MicheleS]

Digger here!! :wavesmile:

Dis is day 10 of de "too skinny" diet. Yum Yum Yum!! Wots and wots of treats and extra din-din. And hoomom says I needs to eat more and more.

My hoomom is on de Weight Watchers diet, too. I habe to help her out; evberry day we go for loooooooong looooooong walkies so dat hoomom can get rid of de calrees. I fink dat is how I gots so skinny. :dunno:

Digger out!

[panzer]

Ajint Tank here....

Ajint Digger You are one luckey dachsie! Getting to haf xtra dinners and tweets iz enuf to make me want to go on da too skinny diet too! I am a gud weight for my size, so I just gits my regular old fud and a few tweets here an dere. I wood like to haf more tweets.


Adbisor Putty I think dat your hoomom and my hoomomma shuld be good frwends habing to not eat there usual fud, and da diet fud is no so much fun for my hoomomma, she been countin da calrees and putting in her waptop and beeing grumpy abouts halfin to lose de weight. Heres sum rayz fur your hoomommy frum me :rayz: :rayz: :rayz: :rayz: :rayz: Maybe our hoomommas could be a gud support to each other to win their war against the evil calrees

Ajint Tank is waiting fur de warm weathur to come and take away de snow so I can go owtside again! Until then I will crawl unner my cubbers
and :snoopy:

Until latur dis is Ajint Tank Ober an Owt:seeya:

[kerie0408]

Dis is Silly Dog wif a reminder--If da hoomom's get skinny, their laps will not be as soft. Most dachsies like to rest dere head or dere whole body on a hoomom's thigh. The thigh should be mushy fer optimal resting. I know because my hoomom has berry mushy thighs (don't tell, okay?). If yew are concerned, spend a lot of time in da kitchen and bee berry berry cute. Hoomom will want to be wif you and she will prbably gwab some extra snacks in dee kitchen and mebbe even share wif you.

:banana02: <---do not let her do a lot of this. It burns too many calrees. Thighs get get to skinny.

Make dee hoomoms do this and try to get them to share: :eating:

[gunther's mom]

Silly Dog- You are berry good at graffics. My hoomom is weaker from dat stoopid calry type diet and might need to go on the older form of the diet. Jes- my hoomom is very very soft and has enuf "thighs" for both me and my brudder.
Agint Tank and other agints- My hoomom is now making a bokly souffle. Is that not pathetic?
Oh I jest moved to the White house. I am a bit nervous.

[maddoxies]

Dis is Ajints Barky Boy and Diaper Doll weportin' in.

We wuz not lost, but da 'puter was bery, bery sick for a loonng time.

We hab been busy wif da new foster. Da hoomom brought her back wif us from da Doxie Phest last October.

We hab been weadin' all our comwrades weports and hope to have good mizzuns to weport on soon too.

It is bery, bery cold here.

Ajint DD has been bisiting da hoograma every week. Da hoograma is wif da hooman white coats. Ajint DD flirts and makes cute wif da hooman white coats so da hoograma gets da extra attentions.

Da hoograma is sick, da 'puter was sick and da time machine is sick.

Hopes to hab da better noos soon

Ajints BB and DD weportin' out

PS Ajint BB turned 5!! on Balentines Day. He gots da ground beef in da bowl as tweets :cheer:

[LaurieE]

Southawn Comfawt heah --

Ah've not been on any miszhuns lately. Awl has been vewy quiet heah. Somethin vewy stwange is goin' on dough. Ah dink someone left da ayah-condishona on wif da fan on high. Up until yestaday da ayah has been nice and wawm. Ah could go outside an wowk on ma tan. But today it's vewy windy and da man on da talking box said tonight it will be in da 20's.:faint: Dat's too cold faw me!! Does anyone know wheyah de off switch is?

SC out --

[kerie0408]

BB and Diaper Doll, tank you fer weeportin' in. I was worried 'bout yews. Sorry dat yer 'puter was sick. My mom was feelin' yucky and all she wanted to do was to lay in dee big bed, but she wanted me dere wif her. Mebbbe if yew had a way to bring da 'puter to da big bed, yew could cuddle wif it and it will get better. My hoomom got better. She said it was just a cold. Well, sometimes I feel like I don't jes have a cold, I have a freezing, 'specially when I go outside.

Southern Comfawt, I do not know how to turn off dee ayer condishner. I think that there is a big ayer condishner dat is on fer all of dee DWD tewwitowies. Dee poisin dwops fell from dee sky and dey fwoze on dee gwound. It berry slippry outside and a dachsie could fall on its rump.

[gunther's mom]

Agint BB dis is Adbisor putty wishing you a Happy Birfday.:happybdaystring:

[panzer]

Ajint Tank Portin in wif wishes an a mishun sukcess story!!:happy046:


A big birfday wish to Ajint Barky Boy
:party_15:


I skored big today, a surprise mishun chance came my way dis ebening, de hoosister left her pizza bwead on de coffie tabul and den dey left da cave to go pick up de hoodaddys twuck. I new I wood git in big trubble if I ate it, but I cudint wesist. I got dat pizza bwead and it wuz berry berry delishus:essen_15: But da hooparents were so mad dat I ate it dey dent give me my dinnur!! Dey sed dat I had too many calrees an didn't need to eat my regular fud. I wuz just tryin to have my own too skinny diet just like Ajint Digger!

Adbisor Putty
I hope dat you are doing ok in da white howse, is it a better cave den your old one??

Ajint Tank ober an owt
:seeya:

[gunther's mom]

Agint Tank -dis is Adbisor Putty. I is berry impwessed with your prowess in obtaining the pizza. And nope I do notlike my new cave, though it will be a better summer cave I think. My hoomans have even suggested that I go to obediance school since I am making a few more accidents. My hoomom and hoodad think I am an emotional "peer". Well ifn I haf to go to obdiiance sckool mebbe I will meet me some nice girly dachshund and elope. Will you all come to my wedding then???

[kerie0408]

Yup, Putty, this is Silly Dog and I would come to your wedding. Hoomom and dad had one and I had to stay wif dogsitter. Know where dey got dogsitter? Dogsitter works in dee white coat place. But I wike her becaws she works in dee front, near dee tweat jar. Hoomom don't like her becaws she dee one dat takes dee money! Hoomom say dat I is "whore" because I slept in dee bed wif babysitter an' I also slept in dee bed wif one of hoodad's fwends dat bisited. Dese people are berry warm. Ub course I would sleep wif dem.

Tank, yew done good wif dee pizza. Yew udder ajints nebber really told me if I was doin' a good job when I was twying to get food fwum dee counter. I eben posted a picture. I didn't show my face becaws I is secwet ajint. Here is picture again:

http://www.liweddings.com/mywedding/album/i/110826.jpg

[gunther's mom]

Silly Dog- Dis is Adbisor putty. I must say we almost look like twins with da same colors. But I gotta be honest wif you (otherwise I wud not be a good adbisor). That outfit-did it weally impress your singificant other at da wedding?No offence here.Maybe I am ole fashinned but meebee your hoomom shouda bought you a tux.
Shucks-I am being critical aren't I. Must be dis freezin cold weather here. I am in my new white house and my hooparents are not as lenient wif da carpet.
Oh-and another piece of adbice. It looks like you are reaching for da coffee. Coffee makes you wired. You don't wanna be a Wire haired doxie,do you? Dats how they become wire-haired doxies, I think. Mebbe wrong.

[panzer]

Silly Dog
I is berry impwessed dat you use de step stool to git the fud frum de counter!:thumbup2: My cave does not hab on of dose things, I half to wait an hope dat dey leave stuff on de coffee tabul.

Adbisor Putty
Da Hoopeople alwayz git mad when you have an aksidint on de new carpit, I got in lots of trubble when we mooved to Alaska fur habin aksidints on de carpit. Dey dont unnerstand we gots to put our smells dere so ebbry buddy nose dat it is our cave! I think you mite be rite about de wired hair doxies drinkin coffee an gitting wired :coffee:

Dis is Ajint Tank ober an owt!

[kerie0408]

Putty, now you is being da silly dog. I did not wear dat outfit to da wedding. Dat is my tough guy outfit. I didn't eben go to da wedding. I had dog sitter. If I did go to da wedding I woulda weared dis: http://www.liweddings.com/mywedding/album/i/98877.jpg

mudder would hab wanted me to wear dis, but I is a BOY: http://www.liweddings.com/mywedding/album/i/98876.jpg

[Bosch-O-Matic]

Ajent Bosch von Richthofen here,

My mission for da week was retreval of pig ear. Mom gave me one earlier in da week and I hid it without her knowing. Few days later after I had bunch to eat I relocated said pig ear.

I was almost caught enjoying it under dining room table, but due to me quick thinking doxie brains I ran fast and got behind couch. Finished eating pig ear and resurfaced as if nothing had happened.


Next mission is to get livaworst out of frig. This maybe one of the hardest missions I've done, but I'm thinking this may help. http://www.cactuspruner.com/images/grabber.jpg

After that maybe this . . . .
http://img153.imageshack.us/img153/5425/dominationzb5.jpg

[gunther's mom]

Agint Silly Dog- Putty here. Must be me advancin years that I thought you went to the weddin. Yer goofy hooparents -tell you what- take dat veil and offer it to one of da girly agints here for her dowry.
Againt Bosch- Oh Pigs ears. My hooparents wefuse to git me one bcus I become so very obsessed with it that I can't eben sleep. I sit and I guard it and guard it to the point of exhaustion.

[Bosch-O-Matic]

Pig ears problem wit me too.

I get one and try to hide it, push it into corners and making my nose sore. Mom comes and take it. Booo her. Then give it back, I figure I need to eat it then or it will be taken again.

Bobo is another problem, me gaurd that baby. Growl at any hooman cept Mommy who tries to get him. Dat my baby!! Mommy put it away now. Say I'm too obsessed. Whatever dat means.

[MicheleS]

Ajent Digger Here!

I knows dat it is rather late, but I say WTG Silly Dog on climbing to the counter. :thumbup2: I can not do dat cuz hoomom not put tings in da kitchen for me to climb. Da world's meaniest nasty cat can climb and gets de fud, but she not shares. Den she gets in twouble and I :rofl: .

I did the bestest misshun ever yesterday. Hoo relatives come to da house fer a barbeekew and hoogramma made some chickens. Well, when hoogramma dropped one, I STOLE A CHICKEN!!!! Dat's right, I stole not just a piece, but da whole chicken. :eating: I thought dat wuz OK, cuz hoogramma made 8 whole chickens for ebberyboddy. She twied to get it back frwom me, but I ran under da porch and went :nanana:: . I managed to gobble about half of it before dey got it back.

I figured dat dey would gibe it back cuz dey say it ruined anyway, but you know what day did: DEY FED DA REST TO DA WORLD'S MEANIEST NASTY CAT. I was so :tantrum2: :hissyfit: :angry013: :angry: after dat.

Digger out.

[MicheleS]

Dis is Digger again.

Now after I gobbles all dat chicken down, I not feels too good. :oops: :vomit: Mutter sed dat it serves me right.

I habe to goes and gibes hoomom de l@@k and say :0211: and den all will be forgiven and I be her little :angel: again.

[abiose]

Azent Bean La Doon checking in :wavesmile:



Now after I gobbles all dat chicken down, I not feels too good.

Ohhhh aw aw aw... poor poor liztle azent Digger *sigh* :0210:
My mizzion of zee day iz to sent you tones of North Pole :rayz: :rayz: :rayz: :rayz: :rayz: to get on your paws, feeling all right soon.

:fuzzyhug:

Azent Bean La Doon checking out... :seeya:

[gunther's mom]

Agint Digger- Dis is Adbisor Putty. Ifin you is not feelin better I will come down to Florida to be yer pwivate duty nurse. I cannot believe you et the whole chicken but I wud absolutely do the same,given the opportunity. My hoomom is on a diet and all the stuff that is falling to the floor is lettuce, carrots....yuck. Mission is to change hoomom's diet.

[LaurieE]

Ajint Southawn Comfawt heah --

Ah went on a vewy good miszhun Fwiday. When Hoomama and the hoogwandson wushed off tew his skool, Ah got da package of chicken legs dat wuz defwostin on da counta. Ah ate twee legs completely, the top pawt of twee, and Ah hid one for layduh. :happy030:

Boy, was Hoomama angwy when she got home and saw da package on da flowah. :fiery: But doze chicken legs shaw wuz good. Ah ate so much dat all Ah culd do wuz waddle when Ah walked. Hoomama said dat Ah ate twee days wuth of food and dat she wuzn't gonna feed me any maw. Den she stawted to call me names like Pawky, Fatso, and Blimp. :sob:

Layduh dat night Ah wanted a snack (since she didn't give me anyding to eat faw dinna) so Ah got out da one dat Ah hid. Hoomama caught me and took it away fwom me. :tantrum2:

Ah twied to weport ma mizshun wight away but communications with Com Centwal wuz down. Ah hope dat doesn’t mean dat dis line has been compwemized.:crsfnger:

[gunther's mom]

Hey you agints from Florida. dis is Adbisor Putty. The chicken mishuns are becoming an art form,I say. But not up here. Like I said my hoomom is on Weight watchers and I haf nebber seen so many veggetables in my life. I am gonna pack my little bags and come to Fla for chicken mishuns. hrmph.. who heard of trying to steal broccoli.. pathetic (and fwankly embarrassin).
I am being depwived in my senior years. No long walkies due to still being very very fweezing.... No good fud lately. Oh no- must stop this whine....

[kerie0408]

Silly Dog here,

Southawn Comfawt, you done a good job.

I hab no new mishuns to repawt. It be gettin warmer outside. Dat means dat if I woll awound in sumfin smelly, my back don't get so cold!!!!! I am weally just workin' on "dee look" a lot. I figger dat I hab to keep up my skils between mishuns!

[maddoxies]

Ajints Barky Boy and Diaper Doll weportin'

We are da subjects of severe doxie abuse :faint:

Da hoomom has put Ajint BB in da cwrate at night and Ajint DD is put in her bed. We been BANNED!! from da big bed. And da L@@K is not workin'. We finks someone has bwrain washed da hoomom. (She say we hog da big bed and she is not gettin' 'nuf sleeps).

Da foster barks if she gets left out, so she gets da big bed all to herself.

NO FAIR

We is callin' on all our DWD brudders and sisters to come and picket wif us.

Pweease send big bed :rayz: if it is too far for ajints and AITS to come :thanx:

Ajints BB and DD out

[abiose]

Azent Bean La Doon, coming out from her deep deep hibernation nap, checking in :wavesmile:


weportin'

Pweease send big bed :rayz: if it is too far for ajints and AITS to come :thanx:

Ajints BB and DD out

Owww Owww... poor poor Azent BB and DD :0210: :fuzzyhug:... how come aunty "M" zoing that to you?

I will try my best "LOOK TM" on my human to make them buy zee big bed or to ride in zee evil house on wheelz to save you all and bring you here to continue zee hibernation nap... I weepeat, continuing zee hibernation nap.

Azent Bean La Doon... yawning... checking out...:snooze: :snooze: :snooze:

[LaurieE]

Southawn Comfawt heah --

Ah can't believe yew've been thwown out of da big bed. :eek: If'n yew want, yew and Diaper Doll can come live wif me. Dayah's plenty of woom in da big bed heah and Ah knows how tew get da chicken legs and otha tweats. If'n yew pweefuh, Ah can send yew de bed of ayah. Dat bed's adjustable so yew can make it as soft awe as hawd as yew want it to be.

SC out

[MicheleS]

Ajent Digger Portin in.

I can't beleeve dat ajents DD and BB hab been banned frwom de big bed. Dat is ebbery doxies right to sleep in da big bed. Iz yer hoomom unner an evil spell? Did da feline ajents get to her? Hmmmm... must be some reason. You can always come here, but you hab to help me wif da World's Meaniest Nasty Cat.

Digger out.

[LaurieE]

Southawn Comfawt heah --

Hoomama has been cutting back on how much food she gives me becuz of da chicken legs. Dat's not wight. :mad: Ahz been hungwy so yestaday Ah went awound da kitchen looking faw somethin to eat. Ah got da last muffin from England. :happy030: That wasn't easy to get eithah cuz no part of the bag was sticking ova da edge. Then Ah said to mahself, "Self, yew need a tweat faw all dat hawd wowk". So then Ah went into da hoosista's woom and got into haw fancy chocolates. Yum, yum. Dey wah good!! :cloud9:

[willsana]

Dis bein' Agent Little Bird, Records Officer,

Upon reviewin' da 'ports in dis ComCenter we be seein' a disturbing trend!

Dachshunds being banned from da Big Bed???? :sosad:

Dachshunds' food bein' 'stricted???? :faint:

Dachshunds beggin' fer broccoli???????????? :insanity:

Dis is bein' bery bery bad news! We must stop dis trend in its tracks. We need to be nippin' on some buds here! We alls knows how ta NIP, don't we????

I CAN"T HEAR YOOOOOO!!!!!!!:hissyfit:

A major type change needs to happen to turn dis all around-a-about. So Dis ComCenter will be a-closin' and new ComCenter will be a-openin'. So follow yer snouts to da new ComCenter to be postin' yer 'ports. ComCenter #29 (http://www.dachsie.org/vbb/showthread.php?p=432351#post432351)

Yous all ben makin' great strides in our 'Cause for World Domination. Do not be discouraged by setbacks. We WILL purse-a-veer! We WILL continue in da knowledge dat:
WE BE DACHSHUND! :shine:

[dapple_dad]

Iz gest wanded tos comz by ans sa howwdy!!! Id noows idz bean a wong wong tim. Woowz hav eyes bean bezi. Id had a wittle wun in wit the the whit coats de ofer da itd waz so tarabull :crying: :kfrown: thad sead I waz getin cut, Id fowd out wud it waz weel fazt.
My hoodaddy iz gettin weady to go on som weally big mizzion, hez downt weally talk to mez tat mush abowt it doe. Hez calls it Iwax ( Iz tink tats it) Oh twap, hear he tums!!!!! miz u giz!!!!

Ajent Fleck OUT!!!!


http://i149.photobucket.com/albums/s57/jon_ann/Badgerinjail.jpg