Operation Muddy Puppy Paws!--Com Center 16

[Dolly's Mom]

Hey all you super duper DWD agents, Agents Grub and Squeek 'portin in after a long hiatus. Agents SM and Bugs' sign off reminded us that we needed to tell you about our latest mission to drive our mommy insane. We got pwenty of water 'round here and it tain' even waining! Seems that we have this thing in our back yard that dwips water into the dirt and makes it all nice and wet. Well, mommy and papa have been trying to regulate the dwip but it seems to have a mind of it's own. Too much in one place and not enough in ta other. Result? Nice and squishy, just perfect for diggin' right around the lemon tree. Oooooh and us doggities do love to dig! Mommy even boughted a bissel steam dwagon and uses it to clean up the mud we sweet agents track in. We keep our mommy very busy but she still lets us sleep in the big bed..........after our paws have been washed. Well, off to torment the cat on the other side of the fence.

Agents Grub and Squeek OUT

There's a hole in our blankie! Repeat! There's a hole in our blankie

[TessieMom]

Dis iz Agent Bouncer. I hopes all Agents and AIT's can find dis new com center dat Agents Grub and Squeek started for us. Da Hoos were getting very close to cracking out code. It is good to hear from some Senior Agents. Da Canadian DWD group has asked dat we gives weal names plus agent names to help dem out, so I will identify my pack:

I am Agent Bouncer, aka Lucy. I have 3 oders.
Agent Lover (da old gal, Stinker)
Agent Missy (da red headed HW girl, Kibby), and
Agent Hugger (my baby sis, Tessie)

Agent Bouncer go'in out to dig an look for Toadies while da poison drops fall

[blazeman]

Dis is Agent Lil-Turd portin in from the Northern Ohio Field Office. Tings going well here. I has been on the hunt for some BIMs who keep coming to my door. THey is tewling me dat de has secwets to tell me... but ain't fawling for da twicks...

It has been bewy buzi here the past two weeeeks. I has a bwoder here now and I is starting his twaining. He should be a bewwy good Agent once he has been twained. I is thinking his DWD name should be "Alpha Cow" or AC for for shorts... does we have and Agent (or AIT) AC?

So here is da rundown of the DWD Northern Ohio Office..

I is Agent Lil-Turd. Many people calls me Jake too... that is my name dat da Hudaddy calls me.

My little spotted bwoder is Elwood (or Woody). As long as we has no AIT or Agent AC, he will me Agent AC (Alpha Cow).

Any udder Ohio DWD Agents?

[Katy]

Dis es Agent, well AIT Ms. Chevious. I needz sum senior agent help. Down hewr in de deep sowth der esn't no DWD agents. Dis terwitory needz cowerage! I be willin two twain, but das nobodie to twain me. And I needz to twain fast. I twicked mom and dad en two getting me a little sistwer so I could has sum bakup sum timez. Anywayz I am willin to twain ober de computr ef sumbodie wil help me out! Jus send infowmacn here and I wil get et when momma haz to tak care of de little sistwer.

I am off to hide my toyz from dis new little sistwer dats comin.
AIT Ms. Chevious signin out, De beagle licks my noz! Repeat, de beagle licks my noz!

[TessieMom]

Agent Lil Turd, der is no AC in our archives, so's your brudder can be AIT AC -- no pwoblem. Be sure he takes da oath an you twains him well.

Welcom AIT Ms Chevious. We has a few scattered agents in da south, but you has your works ahead of you. I would luv to send you 3 of the 4 potential agents dat HooMom calls fosters -- specially dat BT boy dat keeps attaking me when I has sumthing he wants. You could also have da chubby pair dat wrestle all da time.

Bouncer out -- da poison dwops are still falling. I repeat, da poison dwops are still falling.

[Heidismom]

Dis is Agent Bluebonnet. I wuz able to infiltrate Hoomom's work today. She hadda finish packin' up her room for da summer, so I gave her da L@@K an' she took me. I sniffed out alla hookids smells, an' made sure da room wuz safe! Den I met lotsa Hoopeople - eben Hoomom's boss an' da big boss - Hoomom calls him da "Supertendent". Ebrybody at Hoomom's skool has doggies - but only 2 odders hab da right kind so I left sekrut messages on dose people so dere dachsies can get in touch wif me frew Hoomom. She'll be da go-between, an' neber know! After Hoomom cobered her las' cabinet wif paper to keep out dust for da summer, and turned in a file folder, we were done! Now she is on bacation - hurray! - I am sure dat means more tweets for we 4 agents!
AIT Miz Chevious - my sissies an' I wish you all de best, an' hope you get sum reinforcements soon. We CA girrrls doan fink we'd be able to help you much wif local stuff!
Agent Bluebonnet - also speaking for Agents Blinkin', Nod, an' Sleepy, ober an' out. Da bed is soft! Repeat: da bed is soft!

[Dolly's Mom]

It's your CA Centwal Coast DWD Connections again 'portin in wiff our weel names as per orders fwom headquarters. Agent Grub here, aka Dolly. Agent Squeek at your service, aka Madison (Maddie, Madderoo).

An update on Mission Muddy Puppy Paws...
The hoomans twicked us and fenced off the ooey gooey awea wiff the doggy fence. Agent Squeek has been twying to find a way to limbo under the gate but so far has not been successful though she's done it in the past. Me? I is too big at 16 pounds. I did skore though the other night. Hoopapa fordot to push in his chair and I jumpted up on the tabo and helped myself to cleaning his plate. Hoomommy sez weez are the best pot scrubbers around!

Agents Grub and Squeek off to hold down the couch and snuggle in our quilt.

over and under and Zzzzzzzzzz.

[lotsadox]

AIT Fluffer Pup and Speckled Teckel portin in wif da name stuff. AIT Fluffer Pup is Cash and Speckled Teckel is Miller. Altho recwuited AIT Colonel (Bogart) to da cause. He hath an awesome "l@@k". Gets Hoomom every time. Uh oh, time ta go gif Hoomom the "l@@k" to get erwy dinna. Over and under (the covers that ith)

[Mark]

Pssst . . . Are ya sure this com center is safe from prying ears?

OK . . . we be,

LoneWolf (Star), LongDog (Debbie), Weenie (Wimpy), OldGal (Susie), Sweetie (Tiny) and Agent ToughGuy (Brutus).

The sweet potato smashes grapes on cloudy days . . .

I repeat,

The sweet potato smashes grapes on cloudy days.

Agent LoneWolf out!

[Dolly's Mom]

Agents Grub and Squeek nosin' in with our weekend reeport. We got to goferaride today. Oooh, but dats not the best part. Are you ready? We got to meet and greet about 150 other long dogs like us! This Dachsie event was held in Atascadero, CA. That's about 15 miles from where we live. The main event was just fer fun wienerdog racing (about 30 paws in length was the course). Me and Squeek didn't race though. We were too busy getting the nose on other dachsies and trying to recruit them for our cause. I, Grub, was most interested in the dachsies whose hoomans had fud. Squeek spent much of the time running like a silly goose all over the park dragging hoomommy behind her. Our hooparents were very proud of us and especially of me because I didn't grump at anyone, even when some of those impertinent dachsies tried to sniff my booty. I just would sit on my fanny and not let them......hrrrrumph. There were some faux dachshunds there too and I did grump at one of them. Pre-emptive strike, that's what hoopapa called it. Well, it was really a BIG ol' dawg dat was only imdogerating a dachsie and I don't like big dawgs.

Didn't find any agents in the end. They simply refused to take the oath so we had to deny them membership. Maybe next year.

Now we're two tired agents and are off to catch up on our shut eye. We'll check back later. ZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz.

The hotdog is outta the bun! REPEAT! The hotdog is outta the bun!

[TessieMom]

Dis is da Bouncer 'portin in. Congratulations on your work Grub and Squeek. I wish I could a been dere. I went to a training academy for evaluation today (it was 2 hours away) and den we gots to go to watch da agility competition. I could do dat! I had lots of but sniffs and I did not growl at any of dem (even tho I wanted too). Der were no other long dogs dere so I couldn't recruit tho I saw lots of udder doglets. Da trainer guy tried to tell me I had border terrier in my background, whatever dat is. We is gonna go down der for 6 weeks of advanced bedience stuff so I can be a show girl. I likes dat. So many smells. When I gets around da ring, I likes to prance and show my dachsie stuff. I is berry tired now. Bouncer out and under da jumps

[juliette]

Dis is AITs Scratcher and 3pawz portin in! We wer 'cruitin agents twoday! Hoomom and Hoodad put us in da yella zoom zoom an we went to a neat ting called Woofstock. It was a neat ting with lots of places sellin stuff for us dawgs - and lots of da treats!

Der were lots and lots of puppers der - and bwest of all, der were about 20 odder dachsies! We met da dachsies from da rescue dat hoomom's in, and we met lots and lots of odders ones. Of corse, we spred da word on da DWD and I no we got lots of new AITs comin on board!

Hoomom and Hoodad bowt us des really neat bits of jewlery to connect to da ropes (ya no - da ones dat keep Hoomom & Hoodad from wanderin off). Hoomom calz dem "harnesses". Dey were made by the Hoos of a dachsie named Buddy (we met him and he had a crush on AIT 3pawz). Dey are comfy womfy harnwesses!

So, weze was wonderin - now dats we've done misswons against da greases, and recruited da new AITs, when do we get to be da Agents??????

Scratcher and 3paws portin out!
"dat Woofstock was cewl, repeat: dat Woofstock was cewl"

[blazeman]

Helllo AITs Scratcher and 3pawz It's Agent Lil Turd porting in...

I am not one of the DWD directors... but I tinks your misswons and recwuting have made you full agents... we'll has to see what the oders tink...

[TessieMom]

Dis is Agent Bouncer... I tinks dat those who accomplish deeds of valor against greasies and successfully recruit new Agents qualify for full Agent status!!! Congratulations to Agents Scratcher and 3pawz. Be sure to report in further exploits! Bouncer out to get HooMom to obey my commands.

[MARTHA]

Dis be Agent SM and Agent Bugs portin in frum da hot an sweatty south. WEz jus gotz to tellz you whut our nliddle bruddger, AIT Boo. Him gotz da Hoomoms cwredit cward and ordereded us a pooter for home. Dat way wez don'tz hab to go to workie wid da Hoomom or sneek an use DA BOY's pooter...he's stingy anieway. A"IT Boo did a goodz job, he gotz itz customified to fitz our liddle pawz an all da tingz dat we neededed. De, dis iz da bestest part...he gab da Hoomom da "look" an knnvinceded herz dat she ordereded it. He may be shy but he iz a weal smartz boy. Hez iz also gettin weal brave - he hazz started fussin at da LAWN DRAGONS - We iz so proudz ob him - he willa be a full agentz in no time!!!

Gotz to go, itz dinner time.

Remember dis Credit cards aree good...credit cards are good

Agent SM, Agent Bus, and AIT Boo ober an at da feedin trouff...

[MARTHA]

So all ob you new Agents and AITs will knowz who we are...

I am Agent SM - Sadie Mae. I iz a bootiful black and tan tweenie doxie girl. I am bery smart and taleneted and I am so sweet...OUCHH you bit me Skooter...okay I will go on...Enuff bout me,

My luberly sister Agent Bugs - Skooter iz rite here wid me weadin ebery werd dat I rite!...Skooter is a tiny (5lbs on a fat day!) silver poodle that thinks she is a dachshund. You can twy to convince her dat she iz not a dachshund but she won'tz listen. She willz jus stomp her lidle two front feetiez and stomp off. Do Not Confuse Her With Facts. She haz alwayz libeded wid a dachshund an she actz like one - she sure don'tz actz like a sissy poodle.

Da newest member ob our famibly iz AIT Boo - Butchie Boo. He iz half doxie and half chiuwawa. We metz him when we took his birf Daddy in as a Rescue. Dey askeded us if we coodz find a home for Butchie Boo too and we didz but he hadz a stroke and out Hoomom sed dat wez got too much lub investeded in him to letz him go. Skooter and I wuz good nursies when he wuz sickie. Now he iz al mos all recobered. He wobbles sumtimes when he jimps. He iz a rite hansum boy, he is black an tan jus likes me an hez gotz da loooong doxie nose. Hiz hair is so soft an he alway duz whatz Skooter an I tellz him. GOOD BOY.

By the way = muchie tanks to Agent Bouncer fer tellin us how to handles dees boyz dat came in as rescues. Herz advice wuz outstandin an perfectz - as alwayz.

We libz wid our Hoomom and da Hooteenage boy dat we just call DA BOY.

Datz it fer now....it weally iz time fer dinner - I fink I feelz faint frum lack of food..itz been at least 30 long minutes since I hadz me a snackie...

Agents SM, Bug, and AIT Boo ober and outz again

[Heidismom]

Hewwo, fellow and girlie Agents and AITs - Agents Nod (Siglen) and Bluebonnet(Sorcha), 'portin' in! We jus got back from da evil Room of Doom, where we not only got our teefies cweaned, but our feeties got chopped off, too! What will Hoomom fink ob, next? We got to goferide dis mornin' inna time machine, and den, Hoomom lef us dere!
Agent Nod here - I was given sometin dat knocked me out, but Agent Bluebonnet sez I didn gib away any sekruts, 'cause dey didn knock her out - she dus had sum stuff dat made her happy.
Hoomom tol us we gotta quit chewin on Agent Sleepy, 'cause we had a wot of her hair up in our gums! Agent Bluebonnet hasta take medsin, and, woe is us - we can't hab any dinner! We are berry glad to be back home, and will make sure we get xtra food tomorrow to make up for dis disgustin state of affairs!
Agents Nod and Bluebonnet, signin' out. De teefies are cwean! Repeat: da teefies are cwean!

[juliette]

Dis is Agent Scratcher portin in...wat's wid all da twips to da room of doom??? Awntie Charlene (shes da nice awntie ho comes and hikes wit Agent 3 pawz and me evewee day) sed dat my poops wernt lookin dat good, so she calld da hoomom and told her. My tummie has ben feelin a wittle bad da last couple of dayz.

Hoomom put me in da yella zoom zoom and we went back to da Room!! I didn get da nock out stuff - i got da white coat squeezin my tummy, and puttin dis thing dat beeped up my bum!! Da white coat toad Hoomom dat I got sometin up with my tummy called "collie-itis". I haven SEEN any collies in weeks! How did dey give me dis "itis" ting???

Hoomom haz been reely mean since we wnt to da room - she makes me drink dis sweetie stuff bi puttin it undr my tong. Den - she forgot my dinner, and my breakfast!! I've been givin her da L@@K all day.

My tummy is feelin a bit betwer, but it'sa grumblin and a growlin - I tinks I'm starvin to death. Its not fair, Agent 3pawz got her dinner and her breakfast.

time for dwastic mesures!

[blazeman]

Hey Der ebewy one.. it's AIT AC (I am still mad at Agent Lil-Turd for dat name...) portin in from the Northern Ohio Field Office...

Agent Scratcher.. I feels yer pain about da woom of Doom.... da hudaddy took me der tree times wast week! The first time wasn't bad... dey put us in a room... told hudaddy sumphin.. and den we left... the next times... the POKED ME WITH SOMETHING THAT HURT! I was a tough AIT... I didn't cwy.... until dey had d the sharp thing away fwom me... then I was ballin like a baby... (wait... I is still a puppy... da Agents gonna hold dat against me?). Once hudaddy came over... I stopped cwyin.. he said I was a big actor... what's an actor?

The last time we went... was pretty painwess... I got ton the scale... but didn't need to... since I was der the day before getting STUCK!

Hopes da tummy feels better Agent Scratcher... Agent Lil-Turd was tellin me bout his battle with the bad tummy stuff... he tinks you will be fine!

OK... abck to my twaining since huhaddy is at werk... Agent In Training Alpha Cow porting out...

[TessieMom]

Dis is Agent Bouncer 'portin in. Agent Scratcher, I hopes de tummy pwoblems is bedder. Starving an agent is cruel and inhumane, you needs to give your hoomom your very best L@@K.

AIT AC, I tinks dat when you gets bigger and become a full agent, you should choose your own agent name.

I is very glad dat all agents and agents in twaining has survived der twips to da room.

I has a pwoblem here dat I needs help with. Da poison dwops keep falling and da back yard is a giant mud puddle. Some agents has left presents for hoomom on da carpet. Now she has blocked off parts of da house. I needs to find a way to stop poison dwops. Any ideas.

Agent Bouncer out to chew my booda chew.

[Heidismom]

Agents Blinkin', Nod, Sleepy, and Bluebonnet 'portin' in! We doan hab many poison drops aroun here, so if you, Agent Bouncer, wanna move outta yer territory and check out Caleefornya, it's an idea! Agent Bluebonnet is still takin' medsin after her toofie cweanin'. She wriggled and squirmed soooooo much, but Hoomom gab her da medsin anyhoo! We wanna report somefin worse dan lawn dragons! Dere hab bin sum hooguys in our patrol area who make a lotta noise, dig holes dat we didn make, and put pieces of wood inna ground dat Hoomom won't let us touch! Hoomom won't eben let us out on da pewimeter - we only getta go out wif her or inna wittle patrol area inside a wittle fence. Whassup wid dat? Hoomom keeps tellin' us we are gettin' our patrol area "remodelled" - whateber dat is, an' now we doan getta chase da bugs she calls dragonflies or da ones we call flutterbys! Woe is us! But no poison drops to report!

Agents Blinkin', Nod, Sleepy, and Bluebonnet over and out.
Da patrol area is torn up! Repeat: da patrol area is torn up!

[Katy]

AIT Miz Chevious (Maddy) porten in for myself and AIT Miz Understood (Molly) on a recent mission. De most importent mission we have around here is to get de wed dot. AIT Miz Understood don't understand de idea of de mission. Last nite de wed dot appeared and I quickly began to chase dat wed dot. AIT Miz Understood haz a lot to learn, because she wuz chasin ME. She wuz bitten my ears while I wuz trying to get dat stupid wed dot. De dot kept playin twicks, too. It wuz runnin up on my hoomomma's leg...and of course I can't attack it on hoomomma's leg so I just had to wait. Then wittle AIT Miz Understood would be bitten my ears again...It is so hard to compwete a mission wit a baby in de house! I be on de look out for dat wed dot, and hopefully AIT Miz Understood will be taken one of dose baby naps when I see dat wed dot, and I will get it dis time.

AIT Miz Chevious over and out...
The baby naps a lot...Repeat...The baby naps a lot.

[TessieMom]

Dis is Agent Bouncer. AIT Miz Chevious and AIT Miz Understood pwease be careful chas'n dem dots. I has heard of Agents dat has developed puppy ADD because of dem. Dey runs in circles all da time after der hoo's play dat game wid dem. Pwease be berry careful ...
Agent Bouncer out

[lotsadox]

Dis is AIT Speckled Teckel portin in. I'm gwad we don have wed dots here. I gets in nuff twouble wifout ADD! We haf a nu pwoblem. Der are spies in de yard runnin the yard dragons. Hoodad used to do it, but now der's spies out der and hoomom won let us out to get wid of dem! Also AIT Fluffer Pup wen out yesserday and got de poison drops on him! I tol him not to but he don lissen to me. I don go out in the poison drops. I know dey can melt a dachsie! Gonna work on gettin rid of de spies in de yard.

Yesserday was AIT Colonel's birfday and hoomom baked a cake for him. We hadda wear hats to get some but it wass good! Hoodad took pictures of us in hats, how embawassin!

AIT Speckled Teckel over and under de covers. It's nap time!

Da sun is hot - repeat - Da sun is hot.

[blazeman]

Hewwo Agents and AIT's! Dis is Agent In Twaining AC (I am starting to like da name now... I guess I is a wittle bossy).

I has been doin agent twaining tings with Agent Lil-Turd! He is a good teacher! He has towd me bouts the poison drwops... but dey don't hurt him... Just me... wonders hwo he does dat?

Dis weekend I was almost captured by the carpet drwagon! Hu daddy was fighting wif it... Lil-Turd was trwying to attack it... me... I's just hidin the bathwoom. I doesn't like carpet dragons!

Oder parts of twaining... I is learning how to chase Agent Lil_turd real good now! I is using my meanest voice... but he doesn't seem scareded...

I is also learnin to sneak up on the BIMS! Da Hudday doesn't let me get to close... how is I supposed to learn if he keeps stoppin me? huh? Huh?

OK... I has been standin on back feeties to long types dis... I thinks I needs a nappy now.

The treatman is my fwiend... I wepeat... the treatman is my fwiend...

[MARTHA]

per struction frum Agent Bugs and SM. Dey iz twyin to talk our BOY out of goin on sum twip to West VA. I don'tz kno where dat iz but he iz goin dere. We jus wantz to make shure dat da DWD watches him if he comez neer yer area... We wantz him safe an we twust our feller agentz to hep us watch our fer him.

Wid da BOY gone we willz do lotz of secret mishunz durin da day while Mom is werkin. Will reeporertz any developin situashuns *** we find dem

AIT AC I knowz how you feelz wid dat Agent Lil Turd schollin you allz da time. Jus magine howz I feel with AGents Bugs and SM. Dey iz bof girlz an talkies way too much when twing to teach me da wayz ob DWD butz I lubz dem anieway. Oh...an I likie yer name !

Gotz to go, my turn to sit in da suitcase... dis is a well planneded mission at our house!

AIT Boo ober an up in da bed...

wemember - da suitcase is empty...da suitcase is empty

[juliette]

Hedo AITs and Agents - dis is Agent 3pawz portin' in. Iz went to da room of doom dis week! Hoomom lweft me dere awowne - otay, she did leve me dere wit my favrits booda toy so I wasnnt all awowne. De Blue coats shavd my belly!! Da last time dat happned i had da puppers - didnt tink I was havin pupper agwain do. Den dey stuck me wit da jabbers - and den I went to sweepies.

Den I wokie up - and my belly was vwery sore again - dere wer no puppers dis time. I waz at da room all nighties - no Hoomom and Hoodad to snugglies wit!!! Den da Hoomom cames and gotz me and da booda - wz I gwads to see her!!

Im still a bit sorz in da belly - butz its much bwetter todaz! Iz don likes da room of doom!!

Times to go on da mwissns agains wit Agent Scratcher!!

Agent 3pawz portin out!

[Heidismom]

Agent Sleepy 'portin' in, Well, we hadda major sightin' of BIMS today! Dey were makin' so much racket dat I hadda go out an' tell 'em to hush, 'cause we agents wuz twyin' to sleep! We are gonna be bizzy tomowwow - Hoomom will be goin' to her Auntie's house and run her around town - we are not sure, but it souns wike Hoomom will be vewwy tired frum all dat runnin'! Oh, and I wanna report dat AGent Bluebonnet sneaked outta da house when our Auntie came ober - it weally skared Hoomom, cuz Agent Bluebonnet iz not da best at cumin wen she's called. But I stepped in an howled to her dat it wuz almos dinner time, an' den she came right to Hoomom! Agent Sleepy over an' out! Da BIMS are sleepin'! Repeat: da BIMS are sleepin'.

[blazeman]

Hewwo ebewy one. Dis is Agent Lil-Turd and AIT AC porting in from the Northern Ohio Field Office. It's been a fun few days here at da office. Hudaddy has been home and we is workin on getting him to serve us without questwion. He is pwetty easy to twain. Hudaddy is on vacation... whateber dat is... but we ain't compwainin... he is home all day wif us :D

So... on to why he and AIT AC are NOT happy...

Da hudaddy thought the time machine was dirty so he gave it a baff. It wooks all shiney now... exept where me and AC put our nose pwints on the window :D :D :D

Afters hudaddy is done wiff the time machine... he mumbles sumphin about giving someone else a baff. He has neber told us he was giving himself a baff before... so I was confused... until I wealized... he was gibing US baffs! He put me and AiT AC in the baff tub at da same time! I got washed first... and den he made me stand der all wet while he washed AiT AC. I didn't twy and get out... I was to embawassed. It is not nice to leab an Agent of the DWD went in da TUB! I think I am gonna chew sumphin while he ain't wookin...

After hudaddy dwied us off a wittle... we RAN AND RAN... and finished dwying ourselves... now we look good... but we will get dirty again! HAHAHA..

OK... all da running made me and AIT AC tired... times to takes a napp...

Da Boom Booms are coming... I wepeat... the Boom Booms are comin!!

[Dolly's Mom]

Hey Agent Lil-Turd and AIT AC, we bet ya'll do smell PURDY. Agent Squeek and Grub 'portin' in. Chant after us. WE DON'T WIKE BAFFS! WE DON'T WIKE BAFFS! Our mommy gives us baffs only if we've been stinky wollin'. And we get our baffs in the kitchen sink. You can bet that as soon as our little frito paws hit the floor, we're off doin' the woll woll ting on the cawpet to dwy off. Squeek here. Gwub is da biggest BABY and dwama kween when it comes to wollin. Mommy washes us wiff dis wavendar stuff so we weely smell foo foo afterwards.

The hoomans still have part of our yard fenced off so dat we can't pway in da mud. Papa tooked us for a walk da udder night and dis one wittle dawg snapped and snarled at us. Doesn't he know that's Grub's job? Grub is vewwy pwotective on walkies. Papa sez she can act like a real hooligan sometimes......whatever DAT means.

Well, da sun is going away from our side of da fence. Better make a last check on our pewimeter. Agents Grub and Squeek out. Fritos for lunch! repeat Fritos for lunch. :bounce:

[TessieMom]

Dis is da Bouncer 'portin in. I has jus come from da bedience school, so I is berry tired. Four suppers ago, da HooMom tooked me to pick up a wire girl dat is as big as I is. She came from a Hooperson called a "collector" an she weally needed a Baff. She had not been gwoomed or baffed for more dan 2 years an she was only 3 years. She lived outside, so she was full of muddy mats. She originally came from a place called Germany. I tinks dat is a long way away. Anyways she weally needs a new home now dat she has been groomed.

I recommend to all agents dat dey go outside an roll in smelly stuff following baffs so dat de hoopeoples can not pick up da scent from da baff. Agent Missy and Hugger and two fosters has had to make twips to da room, but dey has been berry bwave an has not revealed any secrets. Agent Missy had da butt squeeze and da oders got pokes, but dey is all very good agents.

We had not had any poison dwops in da last 7 meals, but I jus heard a big Boom so I thinks dey is falling. Da Poison Dwops is falling... Bouncer OUT.

[Heidismom]

Agent Bluebonnet 'portin' in! Wowee - wookit alla news! I wanna report dat Hoomom used da floor dragon an' de typhoon dragon (you new agents an' aits may hear yer hoomans call dem bacuum cweaners and carpet shampooers!), an' I made her quit! I am not skered ob dem an' I just stayed wif her until she stopped an' put 'em away! My sisters, er, I mean, girlie Agents here, sed "Bluebonnet's da girl!"
We hab conberted a hooaunt now, an she is gettin' an AIT soon! My sister/agent Sleepy an' I are goin' on bacation wif Hoomom, an' we getta pick up da baby AIT in Texas. We will be commencin' her twaining imedjutly after dat! Agent Bluebonnet over an' out! I ain't afwaid ob no boomers! Repeat: I ain't afwaid ob no boomers!

[Rupert's Mommy]

Agent Mini-Pooper portin in!! (My hooman wantz a Mini Cooper and somtimes callz me her mini pooper)...

Now listn up!! I have solved the carpet dragon infestation! This is wat I did. My hooman was baccuuming the stwairs and I have always tryed to sneak in and bite it on it's soft cloth-like bwody. But this last time I actually got ahold of the dreaded thing!!! I sunk my teef into it and would not let go!!!! When it stopped scremin, I let go because I knew I had finally killed the beast. It turns out that I put a toof puncture in it and it is long gone!!!

Give me a high paw evweeone!!! We are one more step closer to WORLD DWOMINATION!!!!!!!!:D

[Dolly's Mom]

Exxowent wook Agent Mini Pooper! Dis is agent Squeek portin' in for myself and Agent Gwub. Agent Gwub is pweoccupied on a mission under the bwankie. The weeson I is portin' in is cuz I too have slayed a fwoor dwagon but it was a WOOOONG time ado. I did it by biting its tail off. Fwoor dwagons shur have WOOOONG tails! I tot I got it for dood but the hoomans sent it to the fwoor dwagon hostipital and it came back wiff a NEW tail. The mowal of da stowwy here is.......HOOMANS CAN BE SNEEEEEKY! Better watch out to see if that fwoor dwagon shows up again in your wiving woom.

ONE MORE TING! Mommy gave ME and ONLY ME a baff! Gwub didn't get one. It's not fair. She said that I was "thumpering" too much (scwatching) so she made me all lavendar smelling. Gwub hid for an hour tinking she'd be next but never was. What's up wiff dat?

Squeek out. The Squeek smells purdy. WEPEAT! The Squeek smells purdy!:flush:

[TessieMom]

Dis is Agent Bouncer. Congwatulations Agent Mini Pooper! I has taken on many enemies, but only Agent Missy bites da floor dwagon. She has not been able to get a good bite dough cuz our floor dwagons has hard bellies.

Agent Squeek, I remembers how you sent da floor dwagon to da closet. You should go an roll in sumthing veery smelly to make da HooMom know dat you is in charge of your smells.

I wents wif HooMom to pick up a potential agent. Dey calls him Top cuz he spins a lot. He is white wif red blotches an I does not tink he sees or hears berry well. Da boy fosters did not likes him.

Da red boy is scwatching a lot, I tinks he needs a baff too.

Bouncer out to gets some sleep

[Rupert's Mommy]

Agent Mini-Pooper portin in.....this is an unfwortunate repowrt....

My hooman bwought home a new carpet dwagon......it must be in some sort of armor becwase I can't get a good bite on it....

All I can do is just bark my brains out.....

But alas, perhaps his tail???

[TessieMom]

Dis iz Agent Missy. Watch your toofies on da hard bellied carpet dwagons. I iz an expert at dem. I bites at der foot an pulls dem around until HooMom gets out da water spray bottle, den I retreats for a new plan. Good luck,

Missy out to plan

[Kendora]

ok agents-dis iz agent Roni. I iz new, but i iz baaaaaaaaaad! dere iz a battle to be wun here and i need sum idvise! i com frum a dri place, yew mite be knowin it-iz callid arezona. Den my hoomom moved me to dis new place callid minniesoda. dere iz LOTS of poysin drops outsid here. But worser-dere is a biggest pool of poysin drops!! yeppers. i be tellin da truf. it has a trange kinda dirt around it, the little hoomons were diggin it dat. dat seems ok. but den!!! dey wented in the big posin pool. Well, it my job as agent to pertect dese little hoomons! so i tell dat big pool to gib dose little hoomons back! i telled it in my baddest bark, i useed all my powers, even my pecial spy decoder coller. yew know-the wun with the shiney decoder tags. I dont know. my hoomom said pep no bark at the yake. rake? Lake? I not know. all i iz knowing iz dat be bad stuff. i mite need help out here wif all dis poysin. what all yew ixperienced agents do bout dis stuff dey call water? (but...i luv my hoomom but i know she lye. water in my bol. not outside in a pool or fallin from da sky. dat poysin. )ober and out.

[lotsadox]

Dis is AIT Colonel reportin'. Hoomom taked Amanda an me in de zoom zoom to da place with da Room. I was taked to Da Room of Doom, but I wass berry bwave, I didn' say a ting, not a sound. Even Cindy wass impwessed. She tol' my hoomom that I didn' move or anyting. They took bwood out of my neck. Said my wegs were too short. Hmmph! My wegs are jus wight! Dey touch de groun an I can walk anywhere!

Had de big poison dwops here today. I stayed in de big chair wif mom til dey stopped don' want to be wet.

Iz wate. Time to go under cober! AIT Colonel ober and under and everyting.

[Kendora]

well alls yew agents out dere, i mite hafta turn in my agent Roni badge. I done a bad fing. My hoomom taked me in da zoom zoom to her hoomon friend house. She say "Pep, be good boy." Agents, i tryed my bestest. I wanted to be a good doxy, but her friend have a yittle hoomon. An he come and do the 'scared of da doogie' dance in front of me. He yell and screem and den I started barkin an barkin. den he dance an run. I chased. den...i bite. i be so sad and sorry dat i pee on da wug. but my hoomom cryed and the boy cryed and my hoomom's friend cryed. den my hoomom put me in da zoom zoom, and we go home. I like home. but I kin tell my hoomom is sad. i bark and try to say i iz sorry but she say "Pep no bark" in a low way. so i layz qwiet. ober an out.

[willsana]

Gweetings to all Agents and AIT's. My 'port is sorta wengthy. Muchly has bween happenin' here.

But fwirstly, to Agent Roni. 'Dis is bad news. But we do's not abwandon our own! I bein only a AIT. Butten I tinks you be a goodly Agent. Yous must undwerstwand dat wittle tiny pewrsons are por kissin', not bitin'. Dey giggle and a-wiggle when you kissin' der ears! I be hopin' yous learn 'dis someday.

Now for my 'ports: Number 1 'port:
I gotten bery impowtant duties here. My Hoograndaddy has been not at his home since the outside was cold and da frozen poison drops falleded. He bin at a pwace Hoomommy calls da VA. It be big 'n' old. Buttin, I ain't afwaid to go der and do my duty! My duty bein to make Hoograndaddy laughy 'n' be happy. Der are many sad Hoograndaddies at da VA. I try to make dem all happy 'n' laughy.

Hoograndaddy be at his home por a few days! I did my duty ober 'n' ober 'n' ober! Hoograndaddy laughyed 'n' laughyed 'n' bein bery bery happy wit me!
http://photo.starblvd.net/~Willsana/4-4-1.jpg

Number 2 'port:
My cousins 'n' me finded a new creature! It bein like a mousie, but it bein under da dirt! I, a brave AIT, digged the varmit outta da dirt 'n' was gonna kwill it! Dat bein my duty. But Hoomommy 'n' Auntie M would not let me! Dey held me back 'n' let da creature go back into da dirt! Hoograndaddy sed I be right 'n' dey be wrong! He sed I shoulda ben let to kwillin da creature 'n' protectin da green green grasses.

Dis bein da end of my 'portin' por now...

AIT Little Bird, ober 'n' out.

Da Cocker dos play! Repeat: Da Cocker dos play!

[juliette]

Dis is Agent Scratcher 'portin in..(mez upset dat Agent 3pawz and I are still listed as dem AIT's on da sticky!! Wez been da full agentz since wez didz da mwissns 'gainst da greeses!)

Anyz-ways - mez gettin worried. I went back to da room AGAIN today! Dis time da white coat was talkin to da hoomom and hoodad fer most of da time - i was doin da spying andz listenin in to dem. Da White coat was tellin dem all aboutz dems jabs! Den dey GAVE me a jab! Froms what I herd - hoomom is gonna give dems jabs at home radder den da room. Dat's okay, buts me thinks I heard da white coat sey I had to get da jabs every weeks! Dat cant be write - doze any odder agents gets da jabs everwy weeks????????

Alzo, we'ze beens recrwitin! We'ze found a pretty (but kinda plump) dachsie who livez in dez house around dez corners. Her namez is Ginger. We talks to herz thrus da fence and we'ze convinces her to be a parts of da DWD!!

Dwats all - worriedz aboutz dems jabs..but it's almost supper timez!!

[willsana]

My many sorrys to AGENTS Scratcher and AGENT 3pawz! Da Code Book has bwen updated. Pwease, doble check por any more c'rections or 'ditions to da Code Book.

AIT Little Bird, ober 'n' out.

[Heidismom]

portin' in. We hab bin in an upheaval for about 22 dinners! Sum guys cam in an' took da rug in our bedroom, and den dey put hard stuff onna floor. Hoomom's furnchure is in da woom for da time machine. Da time machine wuz outside on da launch pad for about 2 weeks! Four dinners ago, sum udder guys came an' spwayed stuff on da hard floor, and dat nite, Hoomom put our (she calls it hers!) bed back in dere. We still got stuff outta pwace an' we hab bin able to smell all kindsa stuff dat is onna floor. Hoomom sez more guys'll cum to paint da oldest hard floors, an' wen dat dries, all furnchure will be back in pwace, an da time machine will be back in its room. Den we can get out agent stuff back on skedjul! Hoomom iz goin' back to skool now an we are home alone to pwot our pwans! Agents Blinkin', Nod, Sleepy, and Bluebonnet ober an out! Da new gwass iz gween! Repeat: da new gwass iz gween!

[maryanne]

Dis is AIT Manolo porting in. How's you all doing? Yeah,yeah,yeah y'all think I'm bein' lazy round here doing nutting but dat's not true! I sleeps and I snooze and I siesta, OK? It's HOT here, OK? But also I spread the message here overseas.
http://mediaservice.photoisland.com/auction/Aug/20038236279237795443611.jpg
This is me with Fitipaldi, dis guy from de park. I tell 'im all about DWD and he's interested, but then the hoomans got suspicious we was talking so long, so to cover up he growled at me, I growled back, he bit my ear, I lunged for his but then the hoomans separated us, they weally tort we was fighting ha ha, sometimes dere so dumb!!!:dog:
Well on anudder post I got to tell you 'bout de holidays. Dere's dis water, yeah? But it's ALL water, you know, and it MOVES up and down. Hoomommy says she has to dewelop de pics onto see-dee, or summat and dat takes time. Don't know what she's going on about.

[lotsadox]

Dis is AIT Fluffer Pup 'portin in. Mom's been hoggin the puter so I haven't been able to report. Today Mom put me and Amanda in da zoom zoom and took us to dat place. Dey took me in da Room of Doom and even poked me wif needles but I didn't talk. I wass a good agent.

Mom bwought a roll of somefin (pwastic bags, she said) into da house. I think it was a camwa to spy on our secwets! I neutwalized it by peeing on it. Mom was not happy, but I gave her da look and she tol' me it was okay. Da camwa got washed off and put in the pantwy. Can't see much there! DWD twiumfs again!

Agent Fluffer Pup signing off. Watch out for the poison dwops. Repeat watch out for the poison dwops.

[lotsadox]

Pssst! Hey, guys, it's AIT Speckled Teckel 'portin in. I found sumpin on the puter today. I think dey're on to us! Look at this

http://www.sworab.com/spi/

Dey're keepin twack of us! Oh, no! Mayday, Mayday! What should we do? Help!

[Mark]

I, Agent LoneWolf, have this matter well in hand. ;) We at Control have *LET* ;) the hoomans see these Agents. (Insert maniacal laughter here)

Meanwhile while the hoomans are filming these *plants* . . . our senior Agents are carrying out one of our most secret and dangerous missions. :)

The fish swim on the lawn while singing . . .

I repeat . . .

The fish swim on the lawn while singing! :cool:

(BTW, we LOVED the link)

[lotsadox]

Boy, dat's a rewief! I was weal worried. Hoomom took me and AIT Colonel in the zoom zoom to a big office building this mornin'. We went up in 'vator weal high! It wass scawy! Den we went in dis room and chiropwactow put us on a desk and 'justed us. Den we got to go back down and saw some rotties. Had to woof em just so dey know we're here. Uh, oh, here comes hoomom, gotta go.

Da ducks is swimmin'! Repeat, da ducks is swimmin'!

[blazeman]

Hewwo Agents and AITs It's AIT AC porting in from the Northern Ohio Fields Office.

I thinks I dids a few missions to get me bumppied up to full Agent status...

My First mission was yesterday... I went to da woom of doom and SURVIVED! They tried to give me some druggies to gets me to talk... but wouldn't budge! I went sleepie for a bit... and whens I woke up... they tooks my bing bongs!!! Is that what happens when you don't talk?


My next mission was just this mornin. Huhdaddy me and Agent Lil-Turd went to something called daBank. Daddy put somefin in a clear tube thinggie... and it went into this place... when it came back... it had green and white paper in it... and TREATS! I thinks I likes this place called daBank. So after daBank we went to dis place to get daddy some foods... I think it was called Donut Land... I didn't know a Donut was... but I do now (keeps readdin).

So hudaddy is out of da zoom zoom for a few minutes and comes back with a small bag... I WEALLY wanted to know what was in the baggs. OK... on wif da stowy.... we was getting closer to home... daddy said he had no milks.... to it was one more stop.. and dis was when I made my move!!!

Da bag with da donut thingies was in the back seat. Daddys went in to gets the milks... and I sprung into action. I ffound da baggie (behind daddys lapytop bag) and opened it up... it was den I learned dat donuts are YUMMY! I didn't really eat any of one.. but I tried licking out the fluffy chocolate stuff dat was inside! But... since I couldn't reach it to well... I wasn't able to get much of da yummy stuff.. but daddy yelled at me anyway...

So der is my stowy... and my missions from da past 24 hours.. .can I be a full agent now??

[TessieMom]

I tinks you is a full agent, Agent AC. You did well on da Donut Caper... just be sure to score some of dem next time!

Agent Bouncer out to find supper

[Heidismom]

Agents Blinkin', Nod, Sleepy, and Bluebonnet 'portin' in! Tonite we are puppysittin' Agent Sleepy's niece! We hab twied to tell her bout da DWD - but ya know dese 16-week ole puppies jus wanna pway, pway, pway! We are gettin' a big workout here! We twy to tell her bout da glowious mission an' she dus bites sumbody's ear! Sigh! Puppies - gotta luv 'em - dey do gwow up to be Agents sum day! Agents Blinkin', Nod, Sleepy, and Bluebonnet ober an' out! Iz it nap time yet? Repeat: iz it naptime yet?
P.S. We agwee wif Agent Bouncer - you iz a full agent now, Agent AC! (PPS - duz dat hab anyting to do wif da Hoomom's A/C? It went out on Fryday - da wepairman sed itz da compwessor!) B., N., S., and B.

[willsana]

AIT Little Bird, Records Officer, here.

It is noted dat AIT AC is now bein a full bwown Agent! Congwatulawions to AGENT AC!

The officwial change will be loggeded in da Top Secret Code Book.

AIT Little Bird, ober n out.

Da nightime be dwark, repeat, Da nightime be dwark!

[juliette]

heyz dere new Agent AC - dis is Agent Scratcher portin' in. Mez and Agent 3pawz wants to tellz ya dat ya'll bez a grewts full Agent fer da DWD.

We'ze beenz busy here in da grwet northern office - dems Greases are all over da bay rites now - so's wez been doinz our duty and clearnin dem outta here!

Hoomom sez we're goinz on anoder vacaton wits her and HooDad. Dez been goinz places withouts us to protect dem lately - dez were in da Washintons Dee-Cee, butz wez gotz to stay wit da sittwers. Wez almost catch da sqirmy hairless TRIM dats waz in dis cage - but da sittwer found us befors we could compwete da mission. Anywayz..Hoomom sez we goin on vacaton to a Beez & Beez dat take da agentws. Itz gonna wait tils Hoomom gets homez from da travelin roundz da world. Any agents in Miami'z or Londonz can look after da Hoomom??????

Timez for da naps!

[willsana]

AIT Little Bird here,

I is bery involved in whats they calls a "Xtweme Spwort". It be "German Shepard Baiting". Dis be a bery dangerous spwort! Yous must be bery bery fast, bery bery brave, and bery bery cwever. I bes all dos tings! I pways dis game within my German Shepard cousin, Kessie. She be bery bery big, bery bery stwong.

Da objwect of da spwort be to run as fast as yous can and twying not to bein squisheded by da Shepard! In dis piktur yous can see da Shepard flying tru da air. I havin just runned under dem hooman feetsies in da piktur. Kessie landses right behind me ebery time. If'n I stop or turn at da wrong time I will be squisheded!
http://photo.starblvd.net/~Willsana/4-1-2.jpg

Da udder part of da game be teefer clashin! It be bery fun. When I perfowm dis dangerous spwort da hoomans all gaspy n holden der breathin. Dey be bery impwessed by da cwever fast bwave Agent in Training! By da by. Havin I doned good nuff to bein a full bwown Agent yet? I be bery bwave. I keepin da records, I huntin da critters, keepin the Hoogranddaddy laughy and smiley, and I doin da Xtweme Spworts! What doin yous all tink?

[juliette]

Dis is Agent 3 pawz portin in. Mez on Hoodad's puter as Hoomom's puter is in da Fworida wit her.

Iz tinks dat Little Bird is a full Agent of da DWD nowz. De Xtweme Spwortz is goodz and her bwavery meens shez is a fullz Agents. Doez da odder Agents agwees??

[blazeman]

Dis is Agents Lil-Turd and AC portin in from da HuGransmas... we seconds the nomi-nation of AIT Lil-Bird too full agents status...

Must has been a little scary wif dat big dog after ya!

[TessieMom]

We, Agents Bouncer, Hugger, Missy and Lover thirds da nomination of Little Bird to full Agent status. We tinks she is very brave indeed.

Da sun iz shining! We iz out.

[willsana]

AGENT Little Bird, Records Officer, here.

I is bein' bery happy dat yous all nominates me to full Agentdom! I will make yous all bery bery pwoud - PWOMISE!

Agent Little Bird, ober n out!

[TessieMom]

Welcome new AITs!!! We is berry pwoud dat you iz joining us here. Dis is agent Bouncer (my pic is to da left) an I has sum sissy agents an a foster guy here in Texas. We looks forwardz to hearing of your misshuns to help our cause.

Bouncer out to sniff da green stuff in da yard

[Mark]

Agent Lone Wolf here.

Welcome new AITs! We look forward to hearing of your exploits and seeing you complete your first DWD mission that will give you full Agent status.

Pray tell, what sort of DWD enemies are you up against in the far northwest regions?

Here in Istanbul we have secured the perimeter, but a terrorist Tree Rodent infiltrates from time to time.

Keep in touch and be sure to encrypt all messages to this Com Center to avoid leaking information to the hoomans.

Agent Lone Wolf . . . out!

Squealing pigs can't fly until the dawn . . . I repeat, sqealing pigs can't fly until the dawn.

[willsana]

Agent Little Bird, Records Officer, 'portin' in to welcome new recwutes.

Agent in Training snuggle pup and Agent in Training Squirell girl have officwally ben added to da DWD Records 'n Code Book.

Da DWD continwes to grow in nummers and stwength! Domination will be ours!

Agent Little Bird, Records Officer, ober 'n out

[becca]

This is Sharky Mc Boom Boom (aka Buddy but you can jus caww me sharky) portin in to see if i can be an ait. I wead the hand book agwee ta all it sez. My sister, Porky McBeagle (aka Heidi, Porky for showt) also would like ta join. We has been pwacticing da look ta perfection and I tink we bof got it down weal good. We pwomis to be good AITs!!! Pwease, give us a chance. Tank you for your time.


Sharky Mc Boom Boom portin out...i smell some tweats!!!

[TessieMom]

Dis iz da Bouncer port'n back. To be new AITs you needs to read an take da Oath -- should be found in an early thread and reposted later. Den you needs to work for da cause and do special deeds of merit. Da code book by little bird will helps you... cuz I needs my beauty rest tonights... iz you can find da oath and takes it, you iz an AIT!

Agent Bouncer looking for bed :asleep:

[willsana]

Welcome new AIT's!

Agent Little Bird, Records Officer, 'portin' in to welcome new recwutes.

Agent in Training Sharky Mc Boom Boom and Agent in Training Porky McBeagle have officwally ben added to da DWD Records 'n Code Book.

Da Look bes a bery 'portant ting to master. Bery Bery good dat yous all are gettin so goodly at it!

Agent Little Bird, Records Officer, ober 'n out

[Kim H.]

Me an’ my sister see that you got a LOT of new AITs and we want to know if we could join too!!

We pretty young but already done lots of ‘portant things. Mostly, we trying to help Hoo-mama an’ hoo-daddy. They say they wanna redo the kitchen, so we helping. Here’s how –

We took some wallpaper down
We pulled up some of da floor stuff
We took some of da paint off da walls
We put our teeth-marks on da chairs
We removed some of da living room carpet

Mama an’ daddy said NO they don’t wanna redo the kitchen NOW, but we say, that’s okay, we happy to help!! Why wait?? Gotta take stuff down before you can put da new stuff in!!

We also dug a hole in da floor stuff under our pen. We done that five times! See, we TRYIN’ to dig a hole to China thru da floor. Mama an’ daddy finally bought us a new house, that we can’t dig thru. That’s ok, we dig to China later.

We read da Oath and all da ‘speriences of you brave agents and we think we would be good an’ honorable AITs.

My name’s Angel an I’m in charge aroun’ here (ok, ‘cept when Daddy is). My sister Cassie wants to be an AIT too. She’s kinda a silly sister, but she can run real fast an’ she’s pretty smart (don’t tell her I said so). I’m real good at climbin’ on stuff an’ I have defeated all da pillow-monsters in da house AN’ I’m REAL smart. We both real good at da L@@K.

I would be AIT “Gypsy” cause mama says I got those gypsy-eyes when I give her da L@@K, also I good at pilferin’ stuff an’ hidin’ it – I think that’s what gypsies do…

Cassie wants to be AIT “Dora,” after some fish in a movie mama told her she’s like. She says it’s some REALLY brave fish, but I don’t know. I could be as brave as Cassie if I wanted… but sometimes ya gotta be careful!!!

We gotta go… mama might catch us!! We solemnly swear to abide by da Oath an do our best to further da Mission. Is it ok if we be AITs?

A and C

[TessieMom]

Dis is da Agent Bouncer!!! I is soooo happy dat we gots more AITs! You sound like very energetic agents and I am sure will be a great asset to our cause. Little Bird??? Can we add dem??? OK??? I thinks dat dey be verrrrry good.

I is also pweased to report dat I did a "Garage sale" today with HooMom. Don't know why dey called it dat... dat was de only thing dat was not for sale. Der were foods of all kinds, eben special liver treats for doglets. HooMom tried to get me to show off agility, but I stole dat bait before she could get me to go through de hoop! Der were lots of potential agents der and I worked on recruiting. I is also berry tired. So are all de oder agents here.

Off to sleep, den we catches de flies dat Agent Lover let in da doggie door today

[willsana]

Yes 'em, Agent Bouncer! We surely dos welcome dese new AIT's!

Agent Little Bird, Records Officer, 'portin' in.

Agent in Training Gypsy and Agent in Training Dora have officwally ben added to da DWD Records 'n Code Book.

Yous bein bery young recwutes for sure. But yous ben doin' a goodly job! We bein bery bery proud to welcome yous as new Agents in Training!

Agent Little Bird, Records Officer, ober 'n out

[juliette]

Dis is Agent Scratcher 'portin in. Wez beez busy ups here in das gweats north (itz not da gweats whitz north anyzmore - been gween here for lots and lots of suppers).

Agent 3pawz and mez did a gweat protectin mwissn two suppers agoz. Hoomom waz playin with da puter and da phone at home, and shez was talkin on swomthin calls a "confrwence calls" - its looks like da regulars phone, but she sayz it mores importwants.

Wellz, da LAWN DRAGONS came outsidez wits da evil force of Landstealing people (hoomom sez dey are Landscraping, but we tinks day are Landstealing!). Agent 3pawz and I dids our duty! We'ze protects da house from da Lawn Dragons and the Landstealers by bwarking and bwarking and bwarking untilz dey left. Hoomom's shouted at us. She must have been happy that we werez protectings da house and hers confrwence calls! Shez saids all da people rounds the world on the confrwence calls were laughing and cheerwing for us to beats da lawn dragons!

We'ze glads to see all dez new AITs. We newds more AITs and Agents to makes swure we dominate! Alswo, need Agents to protects da Hoomom whenze she goes places withouts us.

We're offs to snugglez in da big beds now! Agent Scratcher 'portin out.

Da covers makes good stealin...repeat...da covers makes good stealin..

[TessieMom]

Agents Scratcher and 2pawz, you did a very good job against the Landstealing peoples and the conference call peoples too! Keep up the excellent work for the cause.

Bouncer out to check the yard for landstealers!

[Kim H.]

Daddy go out of town (prob’ly to buy us toys) so Mama take us OUTSIDE. She say we can’t go alone so she put da ropes around our necks. Then she open da door and AIT Sister and me GO – only we not coord’nate da plan first so Sister go right and I go left an’ we get tangled around a table. Then Sister try to RUN!! Table movin’, little pots o’ growin’ things is flyin’ around, Sister’s foot falls in da ocean!!! (mama say it a “pool”, but we think it must be da ocean!!) Mama untangle an’ try again an’ I run OUT but Sister a chicken and she stay INSIDE ‘an not move!! So ropes tangle ‘round Mama and nobody get anywhere!!

Mama not look happy. She scoop up Sister and we all go out. THEN we get da mission done. We sniff!! We run!! We eat bugs!! We taste da ocean!! We tell da lizards in da yard WE in charge now. We has taken over da back yard, an’ da ocean. Coulda done it faster if sister not a chicken! She -

This is AIT Gypsy reportin’ in to say I NOT a chicken. I just not READY to go yet when da door open. AIT Dora not know it ‘portant to be slow an’ stealthy sometimes. I MEANT to put my foot in da ocean – I just testin’ it.

AIT Gypsy signin’ out to go chase my sister.

[blazeman]

Hewwwo Agent and AIT's It's Agents Lil-Turn and Alpha Cow Porting in from the Northern Ohio Field office...

WE been bewwy busy here is da norf... Hudaddy's had to go outta towns so we's been stay with the hugrandma... we has her fooooled. She things wes like angels :devil: I'll write bout out recwuiting missions laters...

WE wanted to tells AIT's Sister and Gypsy... sounds like you is on your way to great tings in the DWD... keep porting back your missiowns.

Dat twee's are shedding... I wepeat... the twee's are shedding!!

[becca]

Tis is AIT Sharky Mc Boom Boom portin' in. Me an my sis AIT Porky took our Humommy out for her walk today. We started off like any other walk but dis one was different. We was running awound like we alwayz do and then I saw the neighbor kidz coming up the walk. I wan over to say hewwo to them and smelled something stwange on the girlz weg and paw. It smelt like anover dawgie so I had to mark my turff!! I got her good all over her weg!! Humommy wasn't so happy wit me but da girl tought it was funnee. Porky bawkt at me and made me feel bad so I gave the girl a kiss to say I sowwy. Sometimez I fowget dat I can't mark EVEWYTHING. But, I's learnin!! AIT Porky looks bowed so I's gonna go bug hew now.

AIT Sharky Mc Boom Boom over and out

do not pee on da girlz weg i wepeat do NOT pee on da girlz weg!!

[juliette]

Dis is Agent Scratcher callin Agent Monolo....

Wez under-standz dats youz is healinz up afters da attack of da zoom zoom...butz we have a needs for your DWD helpz.

Hoodad has tolds us dats ours hoomoms is gonna go to Spainz...youz ares in Spainz rights? Can you tellz da Spainz networks to watchs outs furs herz whenz shes in da Bark-cell-onz-ahs??

Agents Scratcher out!

[lotsadox]

Dis is AIT Fluffer Pup 'portin in. I'ze been bery active here in da sout'. Last night I killedz a TRIM. Hoomom saw me in da yard wit' it and wasn't happy. Hoodad came and tooked it away. He saidz it wath weally a baby pothum? Wat is dat? I don' know, but I hunted it. I'm alwayth on the alert fo' intwuders in my tewwitowy. Spying on the DWD!

Wat ith a Pothum? Repeat Wat ith a Pothum?

[TessieMom]

Dis is da Agent Bouncer port'n in. I is berry pwoud of all da misshuns dat all da agents has been on. Congwatulations to Fluffer Pup. I tink dat a pothum kill is certainly worthy of making you a full Agent. Agent Missy spotted one once when she had da heartwormies, but she couldn't chase it cause hoomom had a strap on her necklace to keep hers from running. Agent Lil Bird, can we makes Fluffer Pup a full agent pwease???

I had ta go to da room today and got two pokes, but I made da white coat guy work to look at my teeths. I is berry tired, I tinks dat dey gave me sweepy stuff.

Bouncer out to bed.

[Heidismom]

Dese are Agents Blinkin', Nod, Sleepy, and Bluebonnet 'portin in. We need to weport dat Hoomom killed a TRIM yestiddy when she wuz comin' home in her time machine! We know dis cuz Agent Bluebonnet smelleded it on da tires! Dat's one less - even dough we dint get it - sigh! We have lotsa trims around now, dough, an we neber useta see any! Not much to 'port - our cuzn and Agent Sleepy's niece izn't old enuf to unnerstand about our mission, but she's maturin' fast! Agents B., N., S., and B. ober an' out! Da gwass is still gween. Repeat: da gwass is still gween!

[willsana]

Agent Little Bird, Records Officer, 'portin' in.

Yes 'em, Agent Bouncer! Fluffer Pup showed da tru DWD spiwit wit da kill. Agent in Training Fluffer Pup has ben officwially recorded as AGENT Fluffer Pup!

Agent Little Bird, ober n' out.

Wimper-fy!

[lotsadox]

Agent Little Bird,

Tanks so much for making me a weal agent! I'se so pwoud! I pwomise to work weal hard at my duties. I'se aways patwolling da pewimeter and I bark weal woud at da goff zoom zooms and keep dem fwom steawing our secwets. And, a course, I always try to get da TRIMS!

AGENT Fluffer Pup ober and under cober. It been a wong day. Hoomom and dad took us to Meetup and we spwead da word about DWD.

[willsana]

Agent Little Bird, Records Officer, 'portin' in.

Hays all yous experienced agents! I was out doin' mys pottys and patwollin' dis sunrise. Tings seemeded mostly normal. But it was a kinda chilly. Da air smelled "frozen" like. Buts din, when hoomommy got home in da before dark time der was dat white stuff all ober my yard! I 'member it did dat lots when I was a youngin' (I is almost 2 years old now!) Da white stuff is kinda fun...but it covers da good smells, and bese COLD! Da hopper bugs and crickies don't come when the white stuff is here.

Is dis some kinda plwot or somepin? Don't dey knows mys little tushie bese bery bery close to da white stuff????

Agent Little Bird, ober n out.

Da tushie be chillin', repeat, DA TUSHIE BE CHILLIN'!

[juliette]

Dis is Agent Scratcher 'portin in...

We'ze 'members da white stuff two Agent Little Bird - butz we'z gots no white stuffs here! We'ze gotz da poison drops every dayz insteads!

It's gotz to be da plot - maybe dem bad TRIMS or the Greases. Both of the evil campz has been buzy for many suppers. Agent 3pawz is commoflaging herself in da leafies on da grownds to see if shes can spies on dem. Shez is da same colours as da leafies on da grownds - butz she keeps gettins exciteds and twying to chase da TRIMS before shez can do da spyings. I keeps tellin hers, butz she never listens so goodz. Darn sissies.

Any odder Agents or AITs heards abouts dese plots? Must stop da poison drops and da whitez stuff!

Agent Scratcher out

Da leafies are wetz, da leafies are wetz

[juliette]

'dis is Agent 3pawz portin in...(Anybody's wanna rub my belly?)

mez gots a questions. Agent Scratchers been tellin me dats dis is da time of da years whens he gots to goes to da newfie-lands and sees de odder grannie and granps (me never mets dem). Whens hes was in da newfie-lands last years - da swanta paws cames ands browts da chewies, and da buddas, and da bones, an da rawhidies, and da piggie ears. (Please rub my belly?)

Hoomom sez we not goin to da newfie-lands dis year..but mes was wonderins...Does da swanta paws comes here as well as da newfie-lands?? If he does come here - will he rub my belly?


Dis is Agent 3paws portin out

somebody rub my belly...repeat...somebody rub my belly..

[willsana]

Dis is Agent Little Bird, Records Officer, 'portin' in.

I'z 'member da Swanta Pawz dude too! Dis bein' myz 2nd Holidaz Time. Hoomommy tellz me dat da Swanta Pawz comez por all goodly lil Doxies! Dat meens ALL Agents 'n' AITs. 'Cause youz be knowin' der is no suchin ting az a baddy Doxie!

I'z don't be knowin' 'bout dis Newfie-lands. Dey sound far 'n' away to mez. If'n Swanta can find da Agent Scratcher der....WELLZIE! He must bein' a magical dude!

Agent Little Bird, ober 'n' out.

Da Reindeers fly by da pale moonz lite....repeat...Da Reindeers fly by da pale moonz lite!

[Dachshundrsq]

wequest to be New AIT's.....doe we beweeve we could be agents wiff all of our kills.
AIT Mr Wow (Mr. Low, I tant say my "L's" AKA: Milo)
AIT Ms Peed Da4 (AKA: Missy Ann)
AIT Ms Walks Wiff Momma, Ms WWM (AKA: Cinny)
AIT Ms Barksalot (AKA: Miss Rella, Cinder, Cinderella HA!!)
and udders as identifwied by der DWD worvy duties.
AIT Mr WOW Speaking:
Furst I wood wike to say we have suksesfulwy kept TRIMS out of our yard, but Houston we haff a probwem!! It is the Meeses. Da are takin ober. Da outside is cowld, today de white stuff awived, four 45 suppers now da meeses incwease in numburs. Deez Meeses r sneaky, an small. Day can fit in da pwaces DWD's can't. Day are stealwing da tweats and da doggie food. Da are very smart. We have killed numerous Meeses, only to find more dat takes der pwace. Da sitchiation is berry gwim.
Udder stuff which bwings us pluses to be DWD's. JAIT (Junior AIT) Twisted Sis bizzited da Woom of Doom. It was not pwitty. She was a mess win she returned. She hads her innereds whipped open den sewed shut. What kinna twisted hooman dus dis to da DWD's and hoo mus PAY! Well JAIT TS gots her day. Momma Hooman put her on da futon, on a soff fwuffy piwwow, wike dat is gonna make her feel bettur for der sick tweatment. Well JAIT TS wanted down, but Hoomom told her to stay becaws da baby DWD's were on da fwoor and she said TS would be hurt, yeah WIGHT! Well TS peed on da futon, hoomom felt bad and told her it was okay, so Hoomom got cwean sheetz and changed da futon. She put da Baby DWD's up and win hoomom wasn't wooking, TS peed on da futon agin, YES TS, don't take der cwap. Hoomom was MAD, I could tell, but she got cwean sheetz and changed da futon agin. We all quietly waughed at her, she mumbled stuff wike she couldt git nuffin dun, Oh Well! Hurtz da DWD's and seez whats ya git!
AIT Peed Da4 did exacktwy dat! She peed da fwoor, Da white stuff was on da gwound and da QUEEN don't do no white stuff. Ex-twa plus was dat Peed da4 gave hoomom da w@@k and did it anywayz. GO AIT Peed da4. Hoomom put da papers on da fwoor and told Peed da4 she better use dem. HA, goodwuck!
AIT Walkswiffmomma, will pwobabwy always be a AIT cuz she has da snoot up hoomoms, well I fink you know.WWM has pwuses doe. She gives hoomom w@@ks dat gits us food fwom her pwate. She chases Meeses but one Meese bit her wip and now she dint kill anudder one. WWM do guawd da food doe. WWM goes on da twips wiff hoomomma and she spweads da word and keeps watchouts on da outside world.
Ms Barksalot is working on Hoomoms insanity, curwentwy, she is Barking for no weasons, barks to da air, barks all da time.. Hoomom is consentwy yelwing at her. Ms Barks duz da Mees hunting, dwives hoomom insane.
Some missions under our belts wood incwoode, munchin Sloogies dat have dwied on da sidewalkie, wolwing in da Sloogies in da dirt. Killing Meeses and der bigger accomplices da Ratz. Barking at da neighbors, weaves on the gwound, da wind if it bwows wight, barkin at da mailman, fed-ex an ups. coaxin da kitty to da fence, attacking wawn dwagonz out of da yard, Bwaving da poison dwops to bark at intwuders and wots of time machine twavels, even bitty home machine twavels, hoomom calls it an RV but we tinks da beds r on da wheels.
Pwease consider us for Agents, Agents In Twaining and Junior Agents in Twaining.
Tanks, Ober' N out AIT poetencial Mr. Wow and da womancrew

[Mark]

I, Agent LoneWolf, hereby decree (as a founding member) that AIT's Mr Wow (Mr. Low, I tant say my "L's" AKA: Milo)
AIT Ms Peed Da4 (AKA: Missy Ann)
AIT Ms Walks Wiff Momma, Ms WWM (AKA: Cinny)
AIT Ms Barksalot (AKA: Miss Rella, Cinder, Cinderella HA!!)
and udders as identifwied by der DWD worvy duties.

are full fledged Agents . . . anyone who disagrees will have to deal with me!!!!!!!!!!! ;)

[blazeman]

Hewwo from da Northern Ohio fields office. Diz is Agent AC porting in wif Agent Lil-Turd. I herd we haz new Agentz... 1 of dem is MY DADDY. I becames and agent before da dadz :D

Welcome all of da new Agents in da suthern Indian Fields office. Now I haz a better way to talks to Agent Mr Wow (I mizzez my daddy... but am learning so much with Agent Lil-Turd!)

Sowwy so short... but I needs to go play in the frozen poison drops... they ain't as poisony now :D

[TessieMom]

Oh boy! Oh boy! We has new agents!!! Dis is Bouncer portn in. We had dis strange looking potential agent bizit. She wuz 11 years old an had neber libbed inside, so we lets her stay da night and she iz gonna lib with da T Bear now.
http://www.hpphoto.com/servlet/LinkPhoto?GUID=64e999e8-126c-6d86-6262-20b7b0561323&size=lg
Bouncer out to check -- da grass iz still green

[willsana]

Dis is Agent Little Bird, Records Officer, 'portin' in.

I'z not bein' able to get da 'puter from Hoomom! I'z usin' dis teeny winder of 'pertunity ta tell yous all dat I will git da new Agents 'ported ASAP!

Gotta go! Hoodaddy bein' home today too!

Agent Little Bird, ober 'n' out!

Da spotty dwag gots da big nose! Repeat! Da spotty dwag gots da big nose!

[blazeman]

Diz iz Jake... and I iz not happy... hudad took me to da room of doom!

I hadz to get 4 count them... 1...2...4 pokies... AND the twimed my nails! I am I going to live without them nail parts???

They did givez me tweets... so I don't know if it was all bad or not... I did hear the white coat say I didn't haz to come back for a whole year now!

OK... timez to go chew on da bonez hudad is using to bribe me...

[juliette]

Hey dear Agent LT - whatcha doin identwifings yaself by yer real name??? We no dat dis is encwipted and all...but heck...da hoomans might crack da code!

Dis is Agent Scratcher portin in.....Hoomom is NOT happy with Agent 3 paws and mes. We'z hadz a snacks in da big green bags..now shes all fussin and talkins abouts a nights trips to da room of doom. Whats dats abouts?

[blazeman]

oopz... yer right... I toldz ya... I ain't in a good mood... only thing that is makin it better... my bone!

[lotsadox]

Dis is Agent Fluffer Pup 'portin' in on our lades' mission. Me and AIT Speckled Teckel been checkin' dis new stuff dat Hoomom is puttin' in da hous. Der's a twee and gween stuff all ober! What is dis? We gots in big twouble de night o' de big pawty. Hoomom and Hoodad hads fwiends coming ober. Right befor' dey gots here me and Speckeled Teckel (we won't tells which) pees on de corner of de white cwoff on the table wid dos Chwistmas stuffs. Hoomom's was reawwy upsets. She scolds us and puts us in the back woom! She doesn't unnerstan, we hads to lets the enemies know not to comes here! We in twoubles now!

Agent Fluffer Pup ober and outs. De cwoff is yellow . . . repeat de cwoff is yellow!

[lotsadox]

Dis is AIT Speckled Teckel 'portin in. I'se in twoubles with Hoomom. She broughts dis twee in de house and I don'ts do anytin'. Den dese gwifts, agin I dont's do anyting. Next Hoodad puts dis pwesent under da twee and it needs to be cwaimed so I pees on it. Boy was Hoomom mad. She sez "First you pees on de cwoff and now de pwesent. What I gonna do wif you!" I tink she should gib me lots o tweats, but I doan tink I'm gonna gets em! Gotta go, twying to stay outs of twouble!

Twees are in de hous, repeat twees are in de hous!

[Heidismom]

Agents Nod, Sleepy, an' Bluebonnet 'portin' in frum not-so-sunny CA. We hab a sad fing to 'port when Agent Blinkin' crossed ober da Wainbow Brij seben dinners ago. We got many fings in valuable twaining frum her, an' dis loss is a small setback for our cause. We got in trubbo today, too! Our Hoomom got a package frum anudder Hoomom in faraway pwaces, an' dis package ob gweenies waz jus sittin' dere, waitin' to be liberated! Agent Sleepy got up onna chair and den onna table, pulled out da sack ob greenies, an' frew it down. Agent Nod tored a hole inna package, an' we shared - but Hoomom wuz mad anyway! We guess she tought dey weren't ripe enuf for liberation! Sigh!

Agents Nod, Sleepy, and Bluebonnet ober an' out!
Da gweenies wuz good! Repeat: da gweenies wuz good!:fierce:

[TessieMom]

Dis is da Bouncer port'n in. I iz berry sorry to hears about Agent Blinkin'. I misses Agent Lover very much as do our uder agents... I did not get in twouble, but I hads to go with Agent Hugger to da room today, and it wuz not nice. First, I tries to make an escape soon as we enters da door. I scoots like a wabbit into a tunnel in da dry food bags dey had on display... but HooMom mades me come out -- agent Hugger tried to hide too, but it did not work. Den, I goes in da room and dey tells me dat I am a bit too heavy -- okay, I has been have'n too many groceries, but dey wuz good. Den on da silver table and the vet lady brings out a towel and puts it ober my head... wuz dis??? Next thing I know she squirts dat nose shot in... I hates dat. Agent Hugger didn't has to have a towel. She just stood dere. I tink dere iz favorites dere.

Gots to go--- hoo has been workn on cards all night.

Bouncer out.

[willsana]

Dis is Agent Little Bird, Records Officer, 'portin' in.

I'z dun 'corded da new agents. Pweeze check'n make sur I'z got dem ok. Tank yous all bery much.

Youz have all ben habin' bery 'xcitin' mishuns! I'z not ben doin' much of anythin. I'z do da zooms, doe. I'z do da growlz and I'z run bery bery fast! Like da lightenin'.

It bein' bery cold heres now. I'z sleepin' under da blankies and keepin' my agenty self cozy-warm. Da white stuff bein' in my yard all da time now. Itz not so bad. But sumtimez it bein' so cold my footsies hurtses! Din da Hoomom puts down da "shavin'z". Deese bein' lit'l bits of trees. Din I'z can walks on dem and my footsies don't be hurtin'.

Agent Little Bird, ober 'n' out.

Da snood looks dorky, but bein bery cozy. ... Repeat. ...Da snood looks dorky, but bein bery cozy

[TessieMom]

Agent Little Bird, dis is da Bouncer port'n back. I wants som of dat white stuff! I likes it! We wire girls likes white stuff on our feathers. Da feeties could be a pwoblem dough. I heard dat you iz a wire too -- maybe part wire? We wires has to zoom zoom and talk a lot. Gots to go cuz it is late agin.

Bouncer out look'n for white stuff. It iz cold here. It IZ cold here.

[Lovemydachsies]

Dis is Agent Longnose portin in. S'ben a wong time since I could get at da puter. Hoomom keeps turnin it off wif some funny switch someres.

We had some reawwy funny white stuff fallin last week. And, sides that it is vewy vewy cold. Big Poop, Devil Dog and I have decided we prefer to poop in da house. Big Poop and Devil Dog says deys seen dis white stuff afore, but not me. I pwayed in it a bit but deen decided I pwefered to be in hoomom's bed.

We'se been vewy busy keepin tings safe round here. All dese people kept bwinging packages to de door. We barked and barked and barked. Den dey put dis twee in da house. Big poop and I just wanted to check it out and pee on it, but hoodad got weally mad. Dey wocked to woom up wif a gate! :confused:

Oops! Hewe comes hoomom - gotta go.

[TessieMom]

Agent Longnose, it is good to hear dat you iz out der fighting the fluffy white stuff. Good job on claiming da secret tree and da packages for DWD. Hoo people does not understand dat when we marks dem, dey is ours. Dis is da Agent Bouncer and it is berry cold here tonights... an I does not bounce berry well. I hads to go to da Room today cuz I bit HooMom when she touched my paw. I tolds her dat it hurtz and she touched it anysway. Da white coats tried to touch it an eben wid a muzzle thing, I got berry upsets, so dey gaves me a shot an I gots berry sweepy. I wokes up wid my paw all rapped up an I is spicous dat something iz missing... not hungrey... just wants to sweep, sweep ... night....:asleep: :asleep: :asleep:

[juliette]

Dis is Agent Scratcher 'portin in...

Agent Bouncer...mez has da sores paws too! I'z been to da room of doom twice in four suppers, but I didn't gets sleepies...just more of the pill-lumps dat hoomom gives me with da suppers. My paw is startins to feels betters now...maybe your hoomom will give you some of da pill-lumps whenz you wakes up.

Whenz we went to da Room of Doom..da white coats touched my sore pawz..but they give Agent 3paws a sharp jab! Hoomom saids someting abouts dat Agent 3paws won't needs to see da white coats for 3 years!! Dats a lot of suppers..I sees da white coats about every 30 suppers. How comes da sissies gets to be so luckies???????

Times for da nappies...Agent Scratcher 'portin out..

[onebigmickeyfan]

portin in. We'z ben scoutin us a new plaz to liv. Da homom and hodad tooks us in da duv (dachshund utility vehicle) to da plaz wid many twees. We'z is likin dis new plaz lots cause ders lotz of stuf ta smelz. Homom sayz we'z gonna be livin der soon and we'z happy, she sayz itz our husee. Da odder livin plaz is small and we'z like runnin too much to be in da small plaz.

[TessieMom]

Hi der fosser bro Agent Mickey. I iz happy to hear of your new digs!!! Can I come to your house to live? HooMom tooked me to da room and my paw iz all wrapped in red tape. I has tried to remove it and I iz mad!!! I needs a vacation from da fosser dogs too. Bouncer out and still not bouncing...

[onebigmickeyfan]

Mes and Agent Minnie Mouse bin thinkn dat medals of valor need ta be pawed out for da agents whose gots an ouchy in the linez of dudies. Bouncer yuz can come ta r new plaz anytime yuz likes.

[Deb S]

http://mediaservice.photoisland.com/auction/Jan/2004166593802483859386.jpg

incognito - betta don noz whoz dis iz

whens Iz iz all betters Iz iz plying fer da agentz in twainin pawzition - Iz awredy knowz how tu hidez weal gooood!

[Rupert's Mommy]

Mini-Pooper portin in!!!!!!!!!

I has been berrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyy berrrrrrrrryyy busee!!!!! I have much to update....

I wecently moved into a new house so for the pwast fue months I have been busee helping my hoomommy orgwanize and pwack things. This is a bery big jwob!! That is why I have not been able to port in until now......hoomommy had awot to do and needed my hewlp!!! But now me, hoomommy, hoodaddy and my brwother Itchy are all moved in and swettled!!

I weally wike my new pwace!! I have so much woom to wun awound and so many windows to spy out. I have been working out and bwuilding my muscles to get in shape for any upcoming mishon....

Today there was a stworm of those fwrozen poyson drops!! It is so cold outswide. Thwankfully my hoomommy puts one of my sweaters on befwore we go outswide. That stuff makes my wittle paws hurt and I can onwy be out in it for a few minutes before I stwart limping awound. :afraid:

Also, with the holidogs, thewre has been much happenwing. My hoomans were too busee this year to even get a twee!! So instwead they got some stupid branch and put it in a vwase, AND then put that stupid branch in a vwase up on the counter where I couldn't mwark it!! I was bery upset until I realized that hoomommy was going to throw that stupid branch out later. I am already prwacticing my tawget prwactice so I can mwark the twee next year.

I better go...I have many twings to catch up on in the DWD land.

You can make the frozed poyson drops yewllow to neutalize the poyson - - repeat - - you can make the frozen poyson dops yewllow to neutralize the poyson!!!!!!! :circle:

[ShewShew]

Good affernoon couwncel. I am Piper, new to de wowld at onwy 9 weeks owd. I would wike to appwy to DWD as an agent in twaining. My hoomommy tewls me dat we will be doing wots and wots of twavelling in my wifetime. She sez we will be going to de beech, but I downt know what dat is yet. She awso sez we will be going to see my hoogrammy wots, too. My hoodaddy sez I'm aweady an undew weaw gnome, but I don't get it. My main objectives wight now include scoping out my new command powst, finding out mow abowt my bwoffer, Dred. He doesn't seem to be a dachshund, but rather some sowt of largew dog, though not qwite as smart as me.

Hoomommy has cweated some type of fence awound our pway awea. She sez it's so we will stay put whiwe she's gone. I figuwed out how to get out of her "fences" too many times aweady, so now she has de fence. I don't wike it much. My bwoffer, Dwed, ain't much fun. He just laze on his big bed all day, hoomommy calls it a couch. I tink it's fun to pee on it, cuz it makes Dwed mad. I'm still devising a pwan to escape from dis fence. It is swow going. My uffer objective has been to see what's under de big bed. It's bery intewesting unda der. I'm gathewing infowmation on dis "puppy pad" and "howse twaining" de hoomans are constantwy tawking abouwt.

I have been weading about uffer missions of the agents. I have fouwnd dat the big bad pwace is called de room of doom. I now know to watch fow signs of hoomommy saying we are going der. I will wepowt dose signs when I find dem. Hoomommy sez I have to go owften, cuz I'm just a wee pup. She sez it will make me healfy and stwong. I'm not sure abowt dat, but I will be bwave, for de sake of de DWD.

I have discovewed someting called a bafftub, and bafftime. I don't wike it at all! I whine and yell at Hoomomy when she's in der. It's going to huwt her wike it does me. But she won't wisten. I'm scawed for her. She sez we awe going to baff tonight, too, cause I smell wike a dog. What's she tink I'm s'possed to smell wike? She sez aftew my baff I smell wike a hoomon, cause she uses baby sampoo. It's howwible, and I am not going to wike it a bit.

I have seen de stuff cawd gwass, but I haven't been fowced to go onto it yet. Hoomommy sez it's too cold and wet for me just now. Wait till spwing she sez. I'm curious, but have no desiwe to go out onto it jest yet.
I have a wot to offew de DWD. Pwease let me join, I want to be an agent when I gwow up!

Sincerely,

Piper,
Secret Undew Weaw Gnome

[Mark]

Pssst . . . Agent LoneWolf here . . . shhhh . . . someone may be listening. :caffeine:

Welcome AIT (Agent In Training) Piper. Once you have taken the DWD oath (check the archives) and completed your first mission for DWD . . . you will be a full Agent. :)

We here in the Istanbul sector have things well in paw. The 5 of 6 rule!!!! ;)

Beware the pedals of fury . . . I repeat . . . beware the pedals of fury.

LoneWolf out!!!

[blazeman]

Agents AC and LT here... AIT Piper... you needs to picks an Agent Name... you aren't alloweded to yous yur reel nAme

Frito Feet smell good... I repeat Frito Feet Smellz good

[juliette]

Dis is Agent Scratcher 'portin in. Me'z gotz da DWD satellite dish on mez head...cans everybodys reads me?

I was back ats da Room of Doom AGAINS yesterdways. Mez startins to worries - mes wokes up da same ways Agent Bouncer dids! My paws is rapped ups, its be sores and Iz was very sweepy yesterdays. Worst of all, dere was no bwekfast yesterday!!!!!!! Is dis a conpwiricy with da white coats to rap da paws of all agents? Mez cants walks vewy well, and da frozen poison drops are everwhere! Hoomoms puttins dis bag overs da rapping and carryin me to da twee for da smells and da pees. Mes likes da hoomom limo service, buts dis paw rap-sore ting is not funs!

Mes has a question for da odder Agents - mes go to da Room of Doom abouts once evewy 7 suppers, buts da odder agents don't have to go dat often. Hows comes???? Hooomom mutters sometwing abouts odder puppers going to da Room only once a year - dats a LOT of suppers without seein da white coats! Is dis anoder conpwiricy?

Agent Scratcher ober and out

Da dish gets da DWD signals weel goods - donts needs da computer!

[ShewShew]

I, Agent in Trianing, Apple Pi swear to follow the following DWD rules. *raises paw*

1) Never volunteer any information and never ever give in willingly to the hoomans demands.

2) Prior to each communication, try to roll in something that smells really bad, no reason needed.

3)Stash as much yummies as possible.

4) Practice the LOOK to perfection.

5)When you are really Frito like, stick your paws in front of your hoomans nose, they love it.

6)When a car or person go by your home, bark like crazy, " mailman, come to kill us all" hoomans find this endearing.

7) As a DWD Agent, always practice Dachsie etiquette. Be stubborn, very adorable, and get as much food as possible.

8)Be sure to sniff fellow Agents butts to make sure they are legit, very important!

9)Make sure you get the best spot on the bed, world domination will be tiring, push the male hooman as far as you can over to the edge of the bed. Then tell him "stay"

10)Last but not least, keep all kitty tootsie rolls under the bed in case you need extra energy.

*paw down*




Agent Apple Pi rewpowting in.

I began my fiwst mission wast night. The hoomons tink it's funny when I chew on someting dey call a pig ear. I hope dey aren't weally fwom weal piggies. Hoomom kept gibbing it to me wast night, so I tooked it fwom her, and nibbled it for a bit.

I den began a jouwney down, down, down undew de cibbers. It was weawy, weawy dawk unda dere. I was a bit scawed, but I was a bwave giwl. I stayed unda de cibbers, and made hoomommy and hoodaddy tinks i waz sleepin. Den, when dey weast expected it, I pops me head outta de cibbers and bites dem on de hands! Just to wet den knows I waz still der. Dey waz tawkin bout someone commin to see me tomorrow, after de sun ball goes down, I tink dey caws it night. Dey sed de hoolady would be coming biziting me when de sun comes up and goes down again, and again, dey called dem dayz. The new hoolady is going to pway wiff me while my hoomom and hoodad are gone to work (still working on what "work" is, dey weave for a wong time, den dey comes back). Dey sez work time is too wong for me to be by meseff. So she is s'posed to pway wiff me, and feed me so dat bwoffer doesn't dit my food. I will keep me eyes peeled and wepowt me findings after de new hoolady comes to see it. It seems I will have a new hoomon to twain and be my sewvant!

I will have de new communication debise installed today before ,de hoomons retuwn home fwom wowk. It will be in me food bow.

Agent in Twaining Apple Pi, signing off.

[willsana]

Agent Little Bird, Records Officer, 'portin' in.

AIT Apple Pi has officwally ben added to da DWD Records 'n' Secwet Code Book. Welcomes aboard, AIT Apple Pi.
It sounds likes yous a bery bwave AIT. We's pwoud to be havin' yous in our ranks.

I's bery worried 'bout our bwave Agent Scratcher! Man, yous ben to da Room of Doom way to manys times! Da white coats be gangin' up on yous too much! Da dish thingy does make da 'ception bery bery good dough.

A specwal message to da potential AIT hidin' in da jail. Yous bein' bery bery cwafty! We will bein' bery pwoud to have you joinin' when yous feelin' up to DWD duties.

Agent Mini-Pooper, tanks for da yellow poison dwops info! Da northern agents will benefwit muchly from your estwoot obswervatins.

Nows for my pwersonal 'port. I's ben layin' low in da frozen times. I did compwete a mishon ober at da VA couple a suppers ago. I bisited wit da Hoogranddaddy. I makes him happy 'n' smilie. Der is a nudder hoogranddaddy der dat never is happy or smilie. I ben tryin' for a longest time to make him smilie. He asked Hoomommy to lift me up to his chair on wheelies so he could feel my soft smooth hairs! His face did not smilie, but I felt da happies in his fingers. I feel bery pwoud 'n' glad.

Hoomommy is weepy 'n' scared dis after supper time. She sez Hoogranddaddy is bein not happy 'n' smilie. She is not happy 'n' smilie. I feel scared too. Hoomommy sez "Don't yous be worrin'. It will be a-o-k." Duz any agents be knowin' how to send da healin' rayz? Hoogranddaddy needs many of dese tingies now.

Agent Little Bird, ober 'n' out.

Hoogranddaddies be special...repeat...Hoogranddaddies be special.

[Kim H.]

dis is AITs Gypsy and Dora 'portin in. We sorry to hear 'bout da hoograndaddy.

We can send rayz...
:bounce:
no, that not it...
:facelick:
no, that not right either!!!

:rayz: :rayz: :rayz: :rayz: :rayz: :rayz: dere we go!!

We loves our hoograndpa too. Maybe if you licks da mama, dat will help.

[TessieMom]

Dis iz Agent Bouncer 'portn in. I wants to welcome all da new AITs and offer my sympathizing for Agent Scratcher and his satellite dish. Can you get Animal Planet? Dats my favorite.

Agent Little Bird, I wants to sends lots and lots of healing rays to your Hoogranddaddy! I knows he loves you and your family berry much and l wants him to get better soon. In the mean time, you will haf to take care of him and your Hoomommy. Give him the special DWD kiss and dat should help. I gots to go and check da poison drops now cause it is sleepy time, Bouncer out/.

[ShewShew]

AIT Apple Pi wepowtin fow duty.

I went to a room of doom today, but not de one wiff de white coats. It was what hoomom calls da baffwoom. She tooked de noisey snake wiff her in der. It made so much noise, and it stunked up de baffwoom when she put it to my bwoffer's nails. I didn't wike it much, neiver did my bwoffer.

When he was dun, hoomom put me on her wap and made me way on me back. She put the snake to my feet! Oh, it was horrible! I am ashamed to admit, I cwied wike a baby! It was the wowst ting I've ever had done to me, even in da room of doom when de do that ting wiff me back side! I was as bwave as a 10 week owd could be! Do any uffer agent know how offen dis will happen? I don't wike de snake at all!

Will keep my eyes open for da snake fwom now on, udder agents be on de wookout for the noisy snake! Be caweful, bery caweful! I will be wowking out a pwan to find de snake's weakness, will wepowt when I finds it!

Agent Apple Pi, ober and out.

[juliette]

dis is Agent Scratcher 'portin in. Tanks Agent Little Bird...me tinks dat da white coats are gangin up on me...Hoomom mutter someting abouts going backs todays....

Little Bird...me Hoomom was watchin someting called "Da West Wing" (hmm..wonder if it's abouts da birdies??). She said dat dere was info on dis VA place. She said dat only da bwavest and da special hoogranpas go to a VA place. Youz should trys lickies da hoomom really really wells. Youz already do da greats works ats da VA.

We'ze sends da rayz too....:rayz: :rayz: :rayz:

[Jake's Sally]

hye, dis id Agent-In-Training Hopalong Cassidy. I's did somting yeserday dat i tink would hep me be introduwed to dis here finee orgwanizashion.

My hoomom came home from wok an den after she fed me dos yummy toast crusties, she put my sweater on me, but dis time she put me in the time machine!!!! it wuz fun, and when she lett me outta da machine, she put the tie onna my back and we went to this cooooool plawce - it smeelled of all sortza fun doggies. Hoomans kept petting me, but then whyle my Hoomom was pawing through a big tall box, i taught i taw summting udder da shelve. I worked and worked and worked to get to da wee wittle mousie, but my Hoomom kept pullin at me, sawying NO. I gnored her doh. Den, I CATCHED the wittle mousie, an gave him a big crunch! My Hoomom was shouting, NOT FOR Y . . . Lord, tell me that isn't a tail hanging out of your mouth! Oh Lord, is that a Foot!! DROP IT!!!! An den she stwicked her fingie inna my mout and made me dropped my mousie! But he were deded den da doornail, and I were so happie!! An of course, I made surse to check carewfully under each and ewery shelf in the rest of de store. Then de hoomans gaved me a tweat for sawving dem from da mousies! It were da bestest ting id done in da wole year!

Is dat what it takes to be in dis here organwazshion?

AIT Hopalong Cassidy, over and out.

[lotsadox]

Dis is Agent Fluffer Pup. I'se just reads AIT Hopalong Cassidy's post. I tinks dis qwalifies him for a full agent. Dat wath vewy bwave! Hoomom's don't wikes mousie dough. I bwoughts one to my Hoomommy and she yelled, too. I don't get it. What's de oder agents tink. Should AIT Hopalong Cassidy be a full agent now?

De mousies are waiting, repeat de mousies are waiting!

[juliette]

Dis is Agent Scratcher ...'portin in from hoodad's 'puter (hoomom is in da Engwend pwace...do weze have any agents dere?)

Mes also tinks dat AIT Cassidy has made da full agent status!

[TessieMom]

Dis is Agent Bouncer! I vote for full agent status for da gweat hunter known as AIT Hopalong Cassidy! Agent Scratcher, it has been a long time, but der iz at least one agent in London, England dat we used to hear from... I remembers her cuz she wuz a wirey girl named Agent Bowler (her hoomomie posted under Shelbie) but we has not heard from her for ober a year now. Maybe you hoomom coulds find her ober der.

Bouncer out to find some foods. Hoomom had me on dis diet!

[ShewShew]

Dis is AIT Apple Pi wepowtin in. Dis pass week was berry stwessful for me. My hoomom has stawted stickin me in a box when she weaves de house. I's not in der berry wong, but it dwives me cwazy to be in der awone. Broffer gets to stay on de couchbed, why can'ts I too?? Momma says its soz I don't potty aw ober de pwace when she's gone. And I'm gettin back at her by pottyin on my bed, and sweepin on dat pee pad. Datt er show hew. I'll teach her a wesson.

I tink AIT Cassidy is berry berry bwave. I haven't seen one of dose mousie tings yet, but I's on de wook out for dem. Will wepowt in if'n I seez any.

Agent Apple Pi ober and out.

[willsana]

Agent Little Bird, Records Officer, 'portin' in.

It bein' an unpwesidwented move, a newbie member has joined the DWD at the wevel of FULL AGENT! Du to Agent Hopalong Cassidy's bwavery in da dispatchment of a mousie we are pweased to extwend dis gweat honor.

Da DWD records have bin updwated with dis happy happy news.

Agent Little Bird, ober 'n' out.

[TessieMom]

Congratulations to da bwave new full agent Hopalong Cassidy!

AIT Apple Pi, I tinks you needs to be berry careful about pottying on your bed. It is softer dan a pee pad and you does not want to sleep in da potty. Pwease reconsider your decision. You are not getting back at you HooMom, and this will come back to haunt you. Agent Bouncer out to check the grass!

[blazeman]

Hewwo from da Frozen Northern Ohio Field Office... dis is Agents LT and AC. We have to compwain bout sumphin.

We (me... Agent Lil-Turd and him... Agent Alpha-Cow) are pwetty tough agents. Poison Drops... don't hurt us! Even when da Poison Dwops are fwozen... and white... that doesn't scawe us! But today... we has to dwaw da line!

Today when we went outside to "do da business" EVERYTHING was FWOZEN! As far as we could see... was FWOZEN! Diz haz to end! What are FWOZEN Agents to do? No matter how much we piddle on it... it down's unfweze! HELP! Send Wamn stuff.... like FOOOD! That will helps in two wayz! OK... huhdad is commin... must sign off...

Da WORLD is FWOZEN i wepeat... Da WORLD is FWOZEN!

[juliette]

Dis is Agent 3pawz 'portin in...mes in da Canuck offices andz weze havin da sames frwozen problems as da Ohio office - cepts weze has da frowzen worlds...ands da frowzen poisen drops are HIGH! Mez has to jumps and jumps and jumps. Evens Agent Scratcher who is TALL has to jump and jump threw da whites stuffs!

Pwease..hows do we makes da high frowzen poisen drops gos aways?? Homommy gets upsets whens we make potty in da house, buts its hards to makes potty outside whens you gotta jumps and jumps..

[TessieMom]

Dis is Agent Bouncer port'n in. It is COLD here today too, but no froze stuff. I likes da white fluffy kind dat you can push wid your nose! I gets it all ober me an comes inside an shakes. Agree dat it is hard to go pee outside if da white stuff is touching da part you goes pee width. Maybe your hoo could set up an indoor potty for yous? Bouncer gotta go!

[Lovemydachsies]

Dis is Agent Longnose portin in. AIT Apple Pi - I use to dwive hoomom and hoodad nutz by peein on da big bed. Hoomom would yelw at me all da time bout it. I twied to tewl her I toudn't hewp it, but her yewled at me anyways, sos I would grumble and growl all da way down da stairs and outside. When I gets eben, I just wift my weg on a table weg or sometin wike dat. Den, dese bring tings in and put dem on da fwoor. I always hab to mark it to be sure it's safe.

Hoomom tooked me to da woom of doom one day. Dey poked me and wet me go home. Den a couple days watere dey tarted gibbing me sum funny piwls. Nows I only peepee whens I wants to, and hoomom onwy yewls when wese poopies in da house. Maybe yur hoomom can check out da piwlly tings ifn you weally aren't doin it on purpus.

Agent BigPoop had to go to da woom yesterday. Him's got lumpies. Dez say dese not dangrus, but we's not too sure.

Got's to go now; hoodaddy is gonna take a nappie and I gotz to get my pwace in da big bed!!

[Pearl]

Okay. I took da oat to be a Secret Agent. Dey call me Agent Tuff Cookie. When do I get my badge? Will it have my picture on it? I been on a ruff mission and I'm all tuckered out. See, I moved in wis dis familee and I did some snoopin around. They got these three bathrooms where everyone goes to do der stuff, you know, der do . But ...... they spect me to take my butt outide to do my stuff, you know, my do. Well, let me tell ya about outide. It's dirty, der are bugs and birds and other critters. Sometimes it's raining, I'm talking bucket loads, and sometimes it's white and you can't tell one spot from the next. So I's decides if da hoomans can go where they want den I can go where I want. I like da carpet da best because it sinks in. Dey got dees wood floors but everyting just splashes so I don't like to use dem. To make a long story short I got all da hoomans yelling at each other whenever I want. Der faces get all red and screwed up and then dey chase me all over da house :bounce: . Poor hoomans, dey are sooooooo big dey can't get under da chinese cabinet or da sit down thing so I got dat space all to meself. :blue: Yup, I got dem dominated awright. Dat's why I am one tuff cookie. Signing out, rover, 10-4 and all dat stuff.

[ShewShew]

Hewwo? Hewwo?? Anybody der? AIT Apple Pi wepowtin in...wepeat...AIT Apple wepowtin in...Is dis ting on? Hewwo?

If'n yew can heaw me...dis is AIT Apple Pi...de hoomans have moved my communication debice to my torwturw box and I'b not been able to gain good communication since. De bow seems to stay wet all de time now. Maybe it's cuz I spiw my water aw ober de pwace.

I saw someting ober de dayz when de hoomom is home fwom wowk, de weekend she calls em. She calls it a bwoom, I sez it's annoyin. It sweeps past me, teasin me, beggin me to chase it. I tooked it, and tooked it, till I couldn't stands it no wonger. I had to get it. I chased and chased, but it was bwavew den me, and kept comin at me! It finawwly rested in de cowner beside de fwidge. When de hoomom wasn't wookin, I puwwed it outta der, and was gonna show it a tang or two. Hoomom caughts me and yewws at me "no!". I don't wike dat wowd. Hoomom face gets aw funny and her finger fwies out at me.

I's doin bettew on de pee pad. Hoomom seems so excited when I do, and I's twying weawwy, weawwy hawd to get it wight for her. I have discovewed sompin new doe. I have attemptin to ewase all evidence of my existance when I go away by eatin my do. Hoomom is berry, berry upset wiff me, and takes it away befow I can. I tink dis is a very good idea, lease no twace of me since I'm unda da cober. I's attemptin to cober aww me twacks.

I've awso discobered de "backyawd". Berry stwange tings in dat pwace. Will wepowt when I finds more bout it.

Dis is AIT Apple Pi, ober and out....

gosh I hopes dis gits few.....

bark...bark...bar....

[Pearl]

:circle: Agt Tuff Cookie wepowtin in. AIT Apple Pi, do you wead me? I wepeat do you wead me? Der's hidin evidence and den der's hidin evidence. I figered out if dou eat da evidence den dou don't have no woom for tweats. Is der any place in da house where dou dan wiggle under and hide from da hoomans? Dan dou get unda da place where dey sweep at night? Hide da evidence under der. I wepeat hide da evidence under der. Can dou get behind da sit down tings? Where I live der are lotsa dees little dark wooms all over where da hoomans stash all der clothes and udder stuff in da house. See if you can hide da evidence der under sumting. I gotta mission for you if you're willilng to accept it. After da hoomans eat der meal at dark time and everyone is doing whatever da hoomans do after the dark time meal, I want you to climb up on one of da sit down things next to da table. When no one is looking den hop up on da table. Der is always extra food crumbs der to lick up and iffin dou are lucky der might be extra food on a pate and sumpin to drink. But....iffin dou hear da hoomans coming run for your life.:bounce: Run, run, as fast as you can! After dou compete your mission wepowt back in. Good luck. Over and out, 10-4, and rover roger. :angel:

[TessieMom]

Hewwo fewwo AIT's I is new here. I has taken da oath under da eyes of Agent Bouncer and I woulds like to be known as AIT Whiskers. I is berry tired tonights cause I was at da Room all day. Da white coats welly liked me... dey sed I can come back in 3 meals to have something removed... I don't tink is likes dat. AIT Whiskers out... cuz I am almost dere.

[ShewShew]

Dis is AIT Apple Pi powtin in!

I have succeeded in my mission. I managed to cunbinse me mom dat I needed down fwom de bed. When she puts me down to go to de baffroom to make da powwty, I sneaked unda de bed while she's not wookin. I managed to peepee and poopoo unda der befow she finds me! I was also hidin de ebidense by eatin in. Hoomom was horrified of me den! Wouldn't wet me kiss her or nuffin! Den she stucks me in de box! I showed her dow, I didn't cwy or nuffin! Her face was all wed and she was bweaffin hawd and sayin how means I wuz to her to make her cwean da cawpets when her kneez hurts! Wha's kneez?

I been patwollin da backyawd dis week. I weally wike it back der! Hoomom wants me to comes back inside, but I won't do it till I'm shiverin fwom da cowd! I've seen many stwang creatures back der! But I guawds da yawd against em!

Oh! Almost ferdot! Whens I woked up dis mownin, I wooked outside in da backyawd and somepin amazin was happenin! Hoomom managed to take her showa outside! I was pouwin water from da sky just wike mommy's bafftub tingy! It spwashed in ma face, and I didn't wike it one bit! So I chewed up a how woll of papertowels instead!

Ooff...gots ta go! Der's sumpin in da yawd I gots to scawe oof!

AIT Apple Pi, ober and out!

[Lovemydachsies]

Dis is Agent Longnose portin in agin. Tings have been bewwy stwange wound here wately. Big Poop has been going to da room lots in da wast cuppa weeks. He's been rewl rewl sickie. Da oder nite he had a tewwible feber sos hoomom and hoodad tooked him to da room again and he hasn't come back. What did dey do wif him? When hoomom dot home today, I could smell Big Poop on her so's I nose he's somewhere. I hope dey arn't towtuing him for DWD secwets. He be a good agent, doe, he won't talk. Hoomom said somthin bout auto moon disese. Any body no what dat is? Dev (Devil Dog) and I miss poor ole Big Poop.

Ober and out for now. I'm gonna go pester hoomom sum more bout where dey stashed our brudder.

[COLOR=skyblue]:sad:

[Pearl]

Dis is Agent Tuff Cookie weapowtin in. I wepeat ... Agt Tuff Cookie is weapowtin in. Anybody out dere?? Agt Longnose, have you heard back from Big Poop yet? If dey are torchering him we might haf to make plans to break him outta der. If you smelled him on the Hoomom after he's been gone an he ain't back yet then I suggest we start with the Hoomom. We might haf to tie her up to get da dirt on Big Poop outta her. Before we go to extremes I gotta a better plan. When da Hoomom is sweepin in da bed ya gotta question her in her sweep. When she starts her snorin then you know she's really under and ya can question her. My Hoomom talks in her sweep. I tink dey all do. We gotta find Big Poop and make sure he's okay. It sounds awfuly fishy to me. Keep us posted on what you find out from the Hoomom.
:dog: AIT Apple Pi ... job done very well. :flower: A good agent never breaks down in da box. We is proud of you. You is very very lucky to have your own backyawd. We spossed to be badger dogs. That means we spossed to dig as many holes as we can in da yawd to find da badgers so let da mud fly!:circle: Didja make it up on the hoomans eatin table yet? Be tareful cuz it's swippery up der. An dey taut tables were only for da cats! :raz: I ben on a mission. I had it all figgered out. I just had to wait my chance to make my moves. Da hoomans have a safe dat dey keep locked up all da time in da kitchen wit all da pates and dups and knives. After dey eat dey put all da stuff in da safe and den turn da dial and lock it up. Sometimes it makes an awful awful noise and hot steam comes outta its ears and everywhere. Last night da hoomans left it open. I climbed up in dere to see what I tould see. Da pates and da knives all had food on dem!!!:eek: Da hoomans didn't even lick their bowls clean! Dey was messy as could be. It was my wesponsibility to clean up after dem so I started licking everyting I could weach. Nex think I know I hear da hoomans coming up da stairs and dey went wild :crying: when dey sees me. I had to jump out and run weally weally fast and hide under da chinese cabinet. Dey are too big to get under der so it's a safe pace to be. When we are in control we gotta teach does hoomans better manners. What do dey tink tounges are for anyway?! Gotta go I smell someting in da kitchen dat I gotta ilnvestigate. Over and out, roger rover, 10 - 4 an all dat utter stuff.

[TessieMom]

Dis is Agent Bouncer, I is glad to hear from all da agents out dere. Da wedder has been very strange here... we had did fluffy white stuff and nows it has been berry wet with da poison dwops. AIT Whiskers is a berry difficult agent to twain. Agent Hugger and I has been twying dough. I twains him to gib me food and tweets. Agent Hugger snips at him when he gets in HooMom's lap. Den he goes and chews on carpet an he twied to chew da computer wire. HooMom gets unhappy about dat, but she lets him pee and poop in da house. What is up wid dat? NO FAIR. Agent Bouncer out to find a place to hide from da Whiskers.

[Jake's Sally]

Dis id Agent Hopalong Cassidy wepowting in . . . the white stuf id almos gon from da gownd, and der are lots of great smells to check out dat been hidin for such a loooon time, but my hooma be yelpin at me when i dig up the spots dem ewil squirrels were hidin stuf in. I not liswenin to her tho.
The sniffin is good, wepet, the sniffin is good.

[Lovemydachsies]

:( Dis be Agent Longnose portin in adain. Well, I pestewed da Hoomom bout what dey did wif Big Poop. Dey took Dev and me wif dem to da Room were dey were hodin him. I gwouled at da white coat. I wuz makin suwe dey didn't keep me and Dev too. We gots to bwing him home wast nite, but he had to go back dis mownin. What's up wif dat? Hoomom says he can tum back tonite. He had to go back for more meddies, she sed.

Por Big Poop rewwy don wook so dood. He wudn't eat nofin! I mean NOFIN! Awl he wud do is dwink watta. Den he jus swept and swept. Wudn't pway eder. He sed he dint give em any DWD secwets, even doh dey poked im and jabbed im and awl sowts of icky tings. He be a gud, bwave agent.

Dotta doh now - hoodad's doin for a nappy. I tant wet him tink he tan hab da beddie awl to hisselfy.

Longnose portin out!

[Lovemydachsies]

:birthday: P.S. Today is Agent Devil Dog's birfday. She be 5 dey sez (don no mysef cuz I wuznt borned yet). I hope Big Poop fewls dood enuf to have sum birfday cake.

[TessieMom]

Agent Longnose, what is going on with Agent Big Poop that he is so sick. If you lets us know, we kan send him rays!!! Happy B-day to Agent D Dog, I hopes you gets lots of stuff and foods... Come to think of it, I is hungry cuz Hoo has me on a diet!

Bouncer out to look for food.

[Lovemydachsies]

Dis is Longnose agin portin in wif an update. Big Poop dot to come home agin tonite. He seems to be fewlin much betta. He started out wif a lumpie on his back. Den it went to lumpies all over. Da hoopawents kept takin him to da Room, and dey poked him and took his bwood and all dat stuff. Da white coat tot he had somfin called pancwetitis or somfin like dat. Den he just dot rewl sicky. I mean REWL sicky. He had da high feber and wudnt eat and wudnt dwink and cudnt walk nor nofin. Da hoopawents tooked him back to da room and he dint come home for two days. Den dey wet him come home yestaday and he had to go back today. Now he's back home for tonite. Hoodad sez he has to go back tomowwow. Dey sez hes got somfin called Auto Moon disese. Does anyone know what dat is? Da white coat said he was probly predisposed to it, whatever dat means. Hoomom and Hoodad wescued Big Poop when he was bout 2. He's awmost 6 now. Dey sed dis is when dis stuff starts to happen. Agent Dev and me has been weal worried. Agent Big Poop just idn't hisself.

Sides dat, Hoomom and Hoodad are mooshin all over Big Poop and Dev and I only gets a wittle. Since I be da baby, all dat tention is sposed to be mine.

Anyways, dats da newz. Pwease send rays for Big Poop sos he can get well and I can get my lovies and smoochies back.

[TessieMom]

We iz sending da Big Poop all da healing rayz we can send cuz bodth of doz iz not so good. Da Pancreatitus stuff happens we u eats stuff dat you shouldn't... I knows dat an it makes you weally sick! Dat auto immune stuff iz also bad... some agents has gotten it from shots like da ProHeart 6 one or odder vaccinations. Alz we can do from here iz send lots of rayz to him and hope he gets bedder soon. Bouncer and da Waco crew out to looks for more rayz to send.

[dutchman]

Agents Longtail and Silver Fox plus yet to be named agent reproting in. I know it's been soom time since we last checked in. We managed to break the latch on our cate but dad didn't take long finding a new way to secure it. Darn we enjoyes or little scouting trip when that gate was broken. Some how our noses told us it was time to check back in and now we know it's cuz agent Big Poop needs our support.

[Mark]

shhhhhh . . . the hoomans might be listening.

Update . . . once again the Istanbul sector is secure for the DWD thanks to the efforts of senior agents 6pack.

We have received the communication about Big Poop and are sending (very discreetly) many, many DWD Healing RAYZ :rayz: :rayz: :rayz: :rayz: :rayz: :rayz: . . . please do keep us informed . . . without blowing your cover, of course.

Not much else to report . . .

Our cookies have expired . . . I repeat . . . our cookies have expired.

[Lovemydachsies]

Dis be Agent Big Poop. I'se neber used da puter afore so's you gots to bear wif me. Oh boy, has I ben sicky! I tot I was gonna die. Den hoomom and hoodad tooked me to da Room and I hadda stay dere. Dint like dat. Not onwy dat, but dey kept pokin me and jabbin me and made me sweep in a cage. I tot mebee hoomom and hoodad was dittin rid ob me. I been given away a bunch of times. Den dey showed up and bisited wif me for a while and weft agin. Den dey came back waiter and tooked me home. I tot I was gonna get to stay dere, but I had to go back in da mornin. 3 daz now. Tonite, I cud hear hoomom out dere in da oder woom. Dey opened my cage and I wan for it. Dey caught me and put a weash on me. I tept movin towawd da door. Finawy, hoomom put me in da zoom zoom and we came home.

My tummy still feels mushy, but da white coat gave me some bagel yestiddy and I wiked dat. Today, she brot me a whole one for myself. Hoodad gave me ice cream wast nite. If I pways my cards right, mebee I can get all da tweats I want and don haf to eat da crunchies. Dey say I wost 3 1/2 pounds. I weally does look kinda studly now. I's neber been petted or cuddewed so much afore.

But, I neber gave up any DWD secwets, no matter how many times dey stabbed me. I just kept dem to mysewf wike a good agent shuld.

I's tiwed now - needs to go find hoodad's wap.

:bounce:

[Lovemydachsies]

P.S. Tanks awl you guys out dere for all da healin rayz. I'm sure dats why I dot so much better. I preciate it. Big Poop

[Heidismom]

Agents Nod and Sleepy 'portin' in! We hab bin berry busy an' dat's da truf! We saw our sissie, Blinkin', off to the Bridge many dinners ago - Hoomom sez it happened in Desember. Den we sended Agent Bluebonnet off to a pwace Hoomom sez iz called Ida-hoe! She gots a new brudder up dere, and a hoosister, too! Bluebonnet iz busy tellin' her new brudder about da DWD. We got our new Hoodad on Febrewary 7, and he gibs us lotsa belly rubs and tweets - when Hoomom's not wookin'! Our Hoodad went up to Oregone to bisit our new step hoobrudder, an' we are bein' starved here = Mom dudn't gib us so many as Hoodad! We doan hab much else to weport- da twees are gettin' new clothes, da flowers are bloomin' and da poison dwops are fallin' wike cwazy - Hoomom sez CA weather iz changin! We alwaedy had enuf poison dwops for da hole year, an' dis is only March da furst! Agents Nod and Sleepy, over an'out! Da Trims are wunnin'! Repeat: Da trims are wunnin'!

[TessieMom]

Dis iz AIT Whiskers an I dided someting last nights dat I needs to know if it wuz a good ting dat would make me an agent.

I waited until HooMom an all the other agents wuz asleep in da big bed and den I sneaked down to da floor verry carefully so as not to wake dem. Den, I decided to rip da carpet off da floor in da bedroom. I got a 4" by one foot long strip ripped up and shredded before HooMom got specious and yelled for me to come back to bed. She wuz not verry pleased dis morning, said she knew that da carpet had to be replaced but she wuz waiting until I wuz potty twained. Wuz dat a good mishun or did I mess up? My sisters aren't speaking to me right now. She had been talking about new carpet... so I just forced her to think harder. This old stuff smells of odder dogs anyway.

Whiskers out to find more stuff to do.

[Kim H.]

we think ya done very good.

We has done that also to help da mama... only not as much a BIG piece like that... 'cept I am workin on' pullin' da whole thing up from one corner. Mama keeps on catchin' me do it. She say NO! but I think she secretly thinks I doin' a good job.

It not like we eatin' da FURNITURE or nothin' - just baseboards, carpet, linoleum, wood trim, little kitchen cart, 2 stools, one bookshelf, and lotsa wallpaper. It be pretty when we get all new stuff!!

Keep up da good work! We better post more of OUR missions if WE ever wants to be full agents. Mama she always on da 'puter so we can't sneak in a message.

AITs Gypsy and Dora

[Mark]

You are hereby promoted to a full Agent status in keeping with the DWD oath. :) We have heard of your victories and achievments . . . even here in Istanbul. ;)

Signed,

Senior Agent LoneWolf

Who is him . . . the BIMS or TRIMS? I repeat, who is him . . . the BIMS or TRIMS?

Someone needs to open a new Com Center (thread) . . . I think the hoomans may be getting wise to us.

[willsana]

Agent Little Bird, Records Officer, 'portin' in.

Da promottin of AIT Whiskers to Full Agent status has ben 'corded in da records. Congwaduwashuns, Agent Whiskers!

I gotsta 'pologize por my wousy DWDin' duties lately. Tings have ben rough wit my hoomom. I gotsta spend muchly time huggin' 'n' kissin' her. Ifin' I be missin' anyfin da is important por da records, pwease be helpin' me by 'portin' in on it.

Tanks muchly.


Senior Agent Lone Wolf, I wills open da new Com Center 'n' be 'portin' back quickly.

Agent Little Bird, ober 'n' out.

[willsana]

Attention all Agents 'n' AITs. Da Com Center be movin'....repeat....da Com Center be movin'. Da hooman spyin' eyes bein' ebwywhere!

Com Center 17..repeat....17 bein' da next secwet communicwashuns center.


sssshhhh.